We are all Kelly Osbourne now.
Despite being desperate for her boyfriend Matthew Rutler to make an honest woman out of her – Ignoring all that sex they had while she was still married, of course – Christina Aguilera won’t stop wearing the same pair of black tights everywhere she goes. Apparently, she’s one of those women who not only believes a man when he says something doesn’t make her ass look big, she breaks out the goddamn super glue. “These are staying FOREVER.” *squeeeeeeeeze*
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My Eyes!… Oh, God… MY EYES!!….
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO……breathes…..OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Cobblepot 2012
+1, Throw her a fish. It’s not like the smell is a problem.
“My name is Assymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
+1
That ass in those too tight stretch pants reminds me of the Contra Costa County Fair in the 80′s. White trash loves old stretch pants! They got more give!!
Hey, she can wear all the tights she wants. She just needs to pair them up with longer shirts and jackets.
and a smaller ass.
omg u did not just go there
Alright Walsh. Today’s the day so let’s get this over with.
Irving?
I’m sorry Irene.
Come on Walsh we don’t have all day. There’s 50 more houses to tear down after yours.
I’ve been meaning to ask your advice. My friend’s daughter is 17 now and has absolutely the ass kickingest body, especially from the waist down which is perfect. She gives me a total boner. Is it morally incumbent on me to stop going over there to visit my friend?
No, CC, not at all.
In fact, I think it’s time you took things to the next level. How close are you to your friend?
Well, I’ve known him for a long time, and we’ve been on some awesome fishing trips. And he lets me go out on his boat.
However, she’s 5’9″, is a rhythmic gymnast, and wears thongs and those form fitting yoga pants all the time.
I am on the horns of a dilemma.
Define perfect. Perfect like the picture above, or perfect perfect?
Perfect as in you could create a calendar with a different pic of her butt for every month and make a fortune.
I would like it if she shit on my chest.
Your a fucking freak. I bet your mom is real proud of you shit lover.
almost like getting dumped on by a great dane
It looks like there to little ugandan kids fighting over a chicken bone in there. That’s a lumpy butt fo sho ..
I like Big Butts,
and I can not lie…
She’s really let herself go this past year. Don’t get me wrong, I’d still hit it, but with the lights off.
I was wondering how many posts until the inevitable ‘I’d hit it’. I’ll be looking for you next time there’s a Kirstie Alley post, freak.
Actually, that’s her evil twin, Christina Ricotta.
She’s a pound or two away from ‘The People of Walmart’.
* she stars in one of those ‘people of walmart videos’
“And don’t forget, Max, if Mommy’s pants rip, you probably have between 3 and 5 seconds to get to higher ground.”
I’m gonna have nightmares for sure
Why are you on here looking at a chicks ass anyways? Lesbo bitch! and post your picture? White trash!
She’s got to be wearing the leggings because she can’t fit into her jeans and refuses to buy a bigger size.
This.
Good call!!
W.
T.
F.
If she is not careful she is going to choke to death on a Ham Sandwich.
I bet he fantasizes about Christina Aguilera whilst he´s having sex with her…..no,wait…..
Christina
whyyyyyyyyyyy
you can actually sing!…please shape up
we need you back and sexy!
In her defense, she can sing regardless of the size of her ass or lack of sex appeal
Another sexy woman has fallen to age depreciation and food temptation.
Get it together Fat Ass!!!!
Tubby Krueger
Yet another failed attempt at a “Vulcan Butt-Fat Meld”.
Matthew Rutler is impervious to her alien powers!
It’s just going to get worse as time goes by. Watch.
What she needs is a sombrero to balance out that ass.
Whoever thinks she’s still a size 4 after seeing this photo needs an eye doctor. Christina’s a good singer, but damn, she’s gotten huuuuggge! With all that money, she needs to seriously get a nutritional, personal trainer, and personal chef. With her past fashion sense, she deserves to look better than that.
she needs to stop boozing.
honestly, this is poor on Christina’s part. she popped out a kid and looked better than this.
She looks like a pale Snookie, only fatter.
what a mess.
those pants don’t make her ass look fat. All the ass fat is doing that just fine.
To quote Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: “Your ass looks like about 100lbs of chewed bubblegum”
Isn’t this the scene where Ace Ventura spews out naked,covered in slime? I love that scene.
I doubt that ass can move like jagger.
Been a long time since Genie in a Bottle
I don’t understand! Isn’t she required, by law, to wear an ‘Extra-Wide Load’ sign?
Go back through the timeline and watch her ass get smaller and her tits get bigger.
She should NEVER sing the national anthem again either. HORRIBLE…. HORRIBLE… HORRIBLE…
Raiders of the Lost Ass.
Literally all the teen sex symbols from the early 2000s have become fat shadows of their former selves desperately hanging on to fame thanks to loyal guys like me who’d still do them out of remembrance of that time they had a flat tummy and were on the cover of Maxim.
The only thing missing from this picture is that balloon-inflating-to-the-point-of-popping sound effect.
I’ll bet her ass has it’s own gravitional pull, first its penises..but eventually our Sun will be engulfed by its black hole.
There’s another Kardashian out there?
I like how his shirt looks like is says “Assus Clay”. Plus, there’s alwasy a black guy who’s look says it all.
Kevin Federline & Britney 2.0.
she looks fine, love woman witha curvy and a fit, big ass! jlo would be proud of it, but only christina has this beautiful butt!
that ass is NOT fit. That is MUSHY.
This is not the ass you’re looking for.
this ass is perfect! all of you saying her ass isn’t fit are only jealous because you don’t get a beautiful woman like christina maria aguilera!
she thanks G-d for delusional people like you.
If you like her ass that is one thing, but do NOT sit there and say that is a fit ass. Fit asses are high and round and FIRM. That ass is just the opposite.
so you know how she looks naked,ok…
that ass is the exact opposite of fit.
jealous because your ass is fat and ugly unlike christina’s? no problem every woman wants to be beautiful like christina aguilera
I’d love to have a voice like hers, and a bank account like hers, but I’ll keep my body, thankyouverymuch!
I happen to have a fabulous ass and legs! :)
Bitch got a ass like a bag of wet clothes.
lol
I don’t think you can call these tights. They look more like looses.
I’ll bet you can see butt ripples when she farts.
That reminds me, I need new tires before winter.