Despite this being her first major acting role, Christina Aguilera waltzed out to her car with an attitude last night while the rest of the cast of Burlesque made nice with the fans and signed autographs. (Except for, of course, Cher who was permitted to fly a helicopter through the ceiling.) Although, in Christina’s defense, there are plenty of legitimate reasons for her shitty mood including racy photos being leaked online and standing next to prehistoric nipples. Obviously, I’m going to ignore them both and stick to my story about Matthew Rutler knocking her up because I ejaculate journalistic integrity. On that note, anyone notice Matthew’s morphing into Jordan Bratman? No, really, look at him. He’s already got the mole beard going on, and if you checked under his nails, you’ll probably find a soil that can only be found miles beneath the Earth’s crust. This is getting almost as bad as Jennifer Aniston making John Mayer age in reverse.
JOHN: There? I’m a dancing baby. Are you happy now?
JENNIFER: I will be in a minute. *pounces*
JOHN: I need an adult!
Photos: Splash News