Christina Aguilera Knows That Drinking Is Bad For The Baby, Right?

October 1st, 2012 // 50 Comments

Oh, I see how it is. I take a break from the dick jokes to try and save a two-year-old fetus and suddenly I’m the bad guy here. Well, excuuuse me, Princess.

[Ed. Note: I’m trying this new thing where I randomly reference old 80s shows in the hopes I’ll start getting laid by chicks way out of my league like Seth MacFarlane. A dragon-woman hasn’t touched my penis yet, but it’s still early. It’s still early. – SW]

Photos: Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    anon
    Commented on this photo:

    Ursula has left the building

  2. XGL

    I love women with curves as much as the next person, but this is getting out of hand. She looks like the world’s first 300 pound meth head.

  3. rican

    Wait, you think Seth McFarlane is a chick that is out of your league and you want to have sex with her?

    • XGL

      Thats kind of how I read it. First, seth mcfarlane gets hot chicks, now fish wants to fuck him? What the hell does that guy do, bathe in the blood of virgins?

    • Sliver

      OMG, I thought that too. (But don’t worry, Seth McFarlane is hardly out of your league, Fish. )

  4. Deacon Jones

    She’s on pills, probably a cocktail of them. That’s why she’s blowing up.

  5. Rooster Cockburn

    Snooki should sue for trademark and likeness infringement.

  6. XGL

    Here’s the thing… I’m all about girls being healthy and not stick-thin. Someone like minka kelly, or a bit bigger, is perfect. Key word being HEALTHY. It’s dangerous for this woman to say “I love my body, I love my curves, all women should eat whatever the fuck they want and love their body like me!” It’s dangerous. Heart disease is the most common killer of women, and her weight right now is dangerously coming close to causing high blood pressure, clogging of arteries, and type 2 diabetes. She is shortening her life and her quality of life, and it’s irresponsible to act like she is doing that because she “Loves her body!” If she loved her body, she would treat it well.

    • That Bastard Tony

      Not making excuses for her, but she’s likely suffering from depression (anyone who kept up on her during the Stripped years knows she got issues). Hope this isn’t Lady Gaga in 10 years.

  7. That Bastard Tony

    Humor, lots of money, power in the world of film and TV and being reasonably decent-looking are the reasons why Seth is knee-deep in women with loose morals. Yeah, I’m jealous of him too (mainly because of the likelihood of him plowing Mila), but with great power over hot women comes a great case of crabs.

    Nice with the Zelda reference.

  8. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Lil Benny Waffle
    Commented on this photo:

    If all chicks were as “fat” as Christina Aguilera and Jessica Simpson, I’m pretty sure the world would be a much happier place.

  9. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Imoss
    Commented on this photo:

    I got the 200lbs of flour, so I’m ready when she is.

  10. More like a 24-month old food baby. Twins on the chest, and triplets in her belly.

  11. Fish, she was out celebrating the success of her new video, which I honestly expected would get its own post. Instead you post this shit. Lame.

  12. Where was the “old ’80s show” reference? If it was excuuuuse me, that was a Steve Martin comedy act from the ’70s.

  13. Cock Dr

    When the Dr told her to drink red wine for health benefits they didn’t understand that she’d use that as an excuse to pour down 2 or 3 bottles a day.
    She’s done one thing right…she hasn’t gotten married again.

  14. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh oh, Snookie fell into the same vat of acid the Joker did after Jersey Shore was cancelled. Gotham will never be safe!

  15. Cher X

    Nice Legend of Zelda cartoon reference.

    It had to be called out there somehow.

  16. argleblargle

    Hey I can’t fault anyone for making a Legend of Zelda reference.

  17. She’s not that fat, ya’ll. To be fair, she got famous when she was a teenager and she was friggin TINY. She honestly had the body of a 12 year old, a thin one at that. She’s not obese, she’s simply bigger and since she’s short, its all the more obvious. Now, her sense of fashion is beyond hideous. I know the whole “tranny/80s whore” jokes have been tossed around for awhile but its true-she’s a pretty lady but the over bleached hair, fake eyelashes and tan, and atrocious clothes do her no good. Perhaps this is her healthly body weight (and if it is, good for her and eff the haters) but she really needs to stop dressing like she’s still 100 pounds.

  18. cc

    Never mind the drinking, I can’t imagine the all butter milk diet is good for her either.

  19. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    popwilleatitself
    Commented on this photo:

    The left hand says ‘please god help me stay upright’ while the right hand says ‘this tea is simply delightful.’

  20. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    amir
    Commented on this photo:

    Well HE looks pleased as punch to be with a drunk…

  21. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon, Christina, let’s get you home, undressed, and into bed…”

  22. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Yup, I don’t know what happened to my career either…have you seen it?

  23. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Need…help…walking. Too…drunk..to function

  24. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    *She’s got a lot of money, she’s got a lot of money, she’s got a lot of money, she’s got a lot of money, she’s got a lot of money*

  25. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    After all, since Britney is a hasbeen herself, it’s no wonder those who were riding her coattails are even worse off.

  26. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    THIS is who I’m paying to date me? I must REALLY be drunk!

  27. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Every drink is so wonderful
    And suddenly it’s hard to breathe
    Now and then I get insecure
    From all the pain, feel so ashamed

  28. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    I found my genie in the bottle
    And he rocked me the right way!

  29. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Happy_Evil_Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh hey guy I’m paying to be my boyfriend? Guess what you’re doing tonight? You get to remove my blackheads, oh yes you do!

  30. Remember when Britney, Christina, and Jessica were at their prime, and people talked shit about how they gave girls an unreasonable body image to follow? I bet you those are the same people who are now criticizing them for being heavy, ’cause at one point all three have been overweight. You can’t win, honestly.

  31. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    Commented on this photo:

    Those spanx are working overtime. She used to be skinny, some would say too skinny, not me btw, now she’s fat. Looks like she’s never heard of a happy medium. Nobody saying she should starve herself, but put some effort into it ffs.

    Looks like she and Britney are the types of people who project a certain image as long as it’s beneficial and as soon as they have enough money and influence to not give a shit anymore, they just let themselves go.

  32. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    nelle
    Commented on this photo:

    Snooki dyed her hair? And is knocked up again? Who knew?

  33. Thornton Melon

    Can’t it be both?

  34. Christina Aguilera Drunk Pregnant Matthew Rutler
    swe
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks great to me, drunk or not.

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