Chris Rock will not host the Oscars

tn_chris_rock_oscars_cr.jpgYour only reason for watching the Oscars is gone. The Academy has decided to find a new host for the upcoming awards show. It turns out Chris Rock pissed off the wrong people by pointing out the obvious during last year’s event.

Word is, Rock alienated some academy members when he hosted the award show because he mocked the very thesphood of such thespians as Tobey Maguire and Jude Law. An enraged Sean Penn stood up to defend Law, saying the Brit was “one of our finest actors.”

Great, now I’ll probably have to marvel at 3 and a half hours of Whoopi Goldberg’s comedic prowess. Or even better, Billy Crystal. It’s clear that they’re trying to kill off an already dwindling audience, so why not just bring in Gallagher and get it over with?