Chris Brown: How lightly will his wrist get slapped?

March 5th, 2009 // 107 Comments

Chris Brown could be formally charged when he appears in court today after his Feb. 8 arrest for allegedly/definitely beating Rihanna. A FOX affiliate has acquired police notes from the scene that detail the attack which was initiated after Rihanna read “a three-page text message from another woman” on Chris’ phone. TMZ reports:

Brown then allegedly shoved Rihanna’s head against the passenger window. When Rihanna turned to face him, Brown punched her, then continued punching her while driving, according to the detective’s notes.
Blood spattered all over Rihanna’s clothing and in the interior of the car. Her mouth was filled with blood.
Brown allegedly told Rihanna, “I’m going to beat the **** out of you when we get home. You wait and see.”
Rihanna called her assistant and left a message saying, “I am on my way home. Make sure the cops are there when I get there.”
Brown then replied, “You just did the stupidest thing ever. I’m going to kill you.”
According to the report, Brown continued to punch Rihanna, bit her on her ear, her fingers and put her in a headlock — she almost lost consciousness.

But if that’s not adorable enough, E! News reports Chris’ lawyers are hashing out a plea deal and his reunion with Rihanna has seriously hampered the prosecution’s case. Whee:

Sources close to the negotiations tell E! News that the R&B star’s attorneys are in talks with the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office about a possible plea deal that would see Brown wind up with probation–rather than jail time–for allegedly assaulting his girlfriend Rihanna on Feb. 8.
Although the D.A. just received the case from the Los Angeles Police Department today, Brown’s A-list defense attorney Mark Geragos began powwowing with prosecutors earlier in the week.
“They have a victim who’s back together with her alleged attacker, and some conflicting statements from each side,” says the source. “It’s not the slam dunk they hoped it would be.”

So for beating the living crap out of his girlfriend, Chris Brown has had the following happen to him:

1. Had sex on a diamond bed in P. Diddy’s mansion after she took him back.
2. Probably ducked any jail time whatsoever.
3. Got to ride a jet ski.

I don’t want to say the wrong message has been sent here, but I heard next time he’s hoping to fly a jet. You know, because he loves Rihanna so much.

Photo: Getty

  1. Roshaa

    This woman is a fucking idiot……

  2. Jeezy

    Just awful. These two are the biggest idiots in the music industry right now.

    Chris Brown is a little piece of shit whiny bitch with no talent and should rot in jail.

    Rihanna is a dumb bitch for even going out with this waste in the first place. Taking him back just proves how stupid she is.

    Both careers are OVER.

  3. sigh. say hello to the new ike and tina/bobby and whitney combo. i have a feeling we’re going to be hearing about this stuff sporadically for a long time.

  4. lisa

    chris brown needs to pay for this. bigtime.

  5. Stefanie

    they are both fucktards and deserve eachother, what they don’t deserve is all that ca$h and publicity that they /have/will/continue to get about this. He’s a punk bitch and she obviously is a doormat, fuck em both. I hope he gets the book thrown at them, and i hope she looks like a loser pinning for him in jail.

  6. Rihanna, dump him

    Not to state the obvious, but if the above is true, and she goes back to him, she’s crazy. Both verbal threats AND physical violence? She needs a councellor or someone to tell her that even if she loves him, she shouldn’t be with him.

  7. missywissy

    the saddest part of all, is the people that are going to keep paying this dude to listen to his “music”. Same kind of people that support Britney.

  8. Dya


    That’s fucking ridiculous. If that Piece of shit DOES go to jail i hope someone makes him their bitch. And as for Rihanna: GIRL ARE YOU FUCKING OUT OF YOUR MIND? I don’t get it.. I dont care how “blinded by love” or whatever lame ass excuse there is.. you dont go back with someone who hurts you and threatens to kill you, not to mention says you did the “stupidest” thing by calling the cops. I’m surpised her family even let that happen. I know damn well my parents wouldn’t care whether i was 21 or 51 they’d do everything possible to keep me away from anyone that beat me so bad blood splattered all over my shit.

  9. Randal

    Although it is hard to forgive the actions of Brown, I think we should look in our hearts to forgive this man. As we have already seen, he as apologised and appears to be sincere. Lets hope he has learnt a valuable lesson, at that he and Rihanna will lead a full and happy live together. – Randal.

  10. tim

    When will women learn to listen?

  11. Shep

    I always love a happy ending, lol

  12. She can always join TLC, you know, as the new Left Eye…

  13. debagger

    So let me get this straight: if a guy down on his luck decides to sell a minimal amount of drugs in order to get by will probably get 3 years in state prison. All the while a horrendously violent act can’t be upheld in court? Love this country’s priorities…

  14. wtf

    Is there no justice system for hollywood in america? are all the americans on this site not embarressed about how famous people get off free for all sorts of shit??? WTF

    If anything, you should be punished more severely for such disgusting and ILLEGAL behaviour in the public eye. shame america, shame for you!!!!

  15. J-Dizzle


    Randal – You’re an asshat
    That is all

  16. debagger

    Hey Randal,
    I once kicked a baby in the face. I said was sorry… NO BIG DEAL!

  17. Mdiz

    I love stupid girls! I just want to know where JayZ is in all this? You know Jigga is assembling a crew as we speak….

  18. urworstnitemare

    She can always join TLC, you know, as the new Left Eye…
    -RichPort’s Ghost

    that was SO funny :) [and cruel at the same time....just had to throw that out there]

  19. Aja

    If his lips were any bigger, the lower half of his face wouldn’t exist.

  20. BaccusVoexDrosera

    It’s pretty common for a girl to go back to a guy who beats her, it’s pretty retarded her family didn’t stop her from doing it… oh and they could have. It’s not that hard to haave someone declared legally retarded so you can stop them from screwing their own lifes up beyound undertanding. they shoulda called Papa Spears.

    Chris Brown is ugly, and talentless. I’m sure a lot of his frustraition and anger stems from the fact he can’t justify taking up air on this planet. Rihanna is far froma beakon of talent but she does have fans. It’s the classic case of aguy abusing his woman because she has a carreer. RETARDED. If my Gf started rolling in scads of dough I wouldn’t beat her, I’d freakin celebrate. I def wouldn’t bite her… at least not in a violent way. I hope someone just beats this dudes head into the ground.

  21. ChrisB

    This no talent asshole deserves to get ass raped in jail. I hope his career is over because this douchebag does not deserve fame and fortune. She’s a real idiot for taking him back and I hope that her career goes in the shitter too. What wondeful rolemodels for young kids…..fucking wastes of space!! Please don’t support either one of these clowns……let em get married and kill each other

  22. Deacon Jones


    In all seriousness, he looks like that chimp that ate that women’s face in New England a couple weeks ago. Certainly acts like one. I wonder if he made chimp noises as he was punching her, Planet of the Apes style

  23. billabong021

    #9 hey Randal,

    That may have worked when u were assraped in prison but in the real world that kinda abuse is a BAD thing… BAD

    *hits Randal on head with newspaper*


  24. Sauron

    Hello babe! Look which giant walking greek statue is back:)

  25. This bubble lip jack ass should be spending time in the pokey….I thought it was sexy shes showing interest even though its annoying when people go through your stuff…

  26. awesome M

    LMAO@ 22…..He DOES look like the crazy chimp that ate the woman’s face in CT!!! Fucking Curious Brown. He’s an animal….I’m sure he made ape sounds while he punched her in the face. ” Ungowa!!! Ungowa!!! me no like nosey woman!!!” When I first heard the story, I actually felt bad for Rihanna. But now that I know she’s dumb enough to take this woman beater back, I think he didn’t hit her hard enough!! Maybe if he put her head through the glass, it would have knocked some sense into her dumb ass. Losers!!!

  27. sammywhy

    he is my hero,and certainly the best player of all time
    Many young girls and hot models on ___T a l l m i n g l e Co m___ wanna marry a man like him. I did see some supermodels there. I know many guys tired of dating the ordinary, maybe u can meet your special at this superb club :-)

  28. Anexio

    I for one am sicks of tired of this man being vilified by you poeople.

    He never convicted!!!

    Try to look at this from his prespective cause he never did notthing wrong ever.

    Grow you people that hate.

  29. Sauron

    I’m not going to kick you in the nuts Chris Brown,i’m not that low.I’m sure 4 knuckle prints on your forehead will do.

  30. Ads

    WTF? Rihanna needs sectioning under the mental health act, and this fuckface needs his skin peeled off. Slowly.

  31. Marfar

    “I’ll take ‘Ways to bring not one, but two, careers to a screeching halt’ for $800, Alex.”

    Jesus. Come on, RiRi.

  32. The White Urkel

    Ever since Obama took office the negro’s have been getting a free pass on everything.

    Too bad OJ couldn’t have had his trial delayed. He would be a free man again.

  33. If she’s going to let him beat her, at least do it in private. By making this all public and then returning to him, she’s sending a message to young fans that it doesn’t matter how badly you are treated, you should stay together. Sad/

  34. Darth

    We haven’t heard anything from Rihanna herself since her abuse.What’s up with her?

  35. That is one stupid fucking watch.

  36. Gando

    Can somebody tell me what time it is? I lost my watch some time ago.

  37. guess what?rihanna is stupid.and her music sucks.stupid et

  38. Cap'n Jokey

    I find this very disturbing, particularly because there don’t seem to be any umbrella/domestic violence jokes by any of the commentors here.

    I’d appreciate it if we could step it up a bit.

  39. lol @ him probably not beating her up that bad if she’s going back to him. dude cuffs his woman up for mouthing off a little, and people are acting like this is the worst thing in the world.

  40. Ed Castillo

    Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

    So he messed up? Who hasn’t? I bet most dudes on here have hit or wanted to hit a bitch at some point (even though you shouldn’t). The important thing is he’s asked for forgiveness and they are in love. Give the guy another chance.

  41. I hate Randal

    I would love to know what this faggot’s problem it. As long as a person is a celebrity Randal the dick slayer is happy to sniff an ass.
    Hey ass pirate, how do you feel about non-famous people like scientists and engineers and doctors? You know, the ones that keep this world functioning ir R E A L I T Y.

  42. marketingwiz

    If she doesn’t stand up to him then she deserves to be hit repeatedly. Maybe they’ll end up being the black version of Sid and Nancy. I just hope he remembers to kill himself.

  43. timmy the dying boy

    Chris Brown is clearly the last of the great romantics.

  44. justifiable

    You can see why he’s been trying sooo hard to get her back and get back into her good graces with going to the pastor, etc- if she won’t testify they can prosecute him but it won’t go far. And every fucker who’s put pressure on her indirectly by claiming how much he loves her, he’s young, young people make mistakes and are just “passionate”, we should “give him a break” and a second chance, should hang his fucking head in shame, because you aided and abetted the act just as much if you’d held her for him to punch.
    That’s YOU, Kanye West, Mekhi Pfifer, Terence Howard. Oh yeah, and YOU, Randal, you fucking douchebag – not even remotely funny. See that face looking at you in the mirror, you guys? That’s not what a real man looks like.

    Oh, and Anexio #28? As long as you’re using the internet translator for your “english” stop the fuck posting – it ain’t working. And stop posting anyway, you’re a douchebag just like Randal.

  45. etr

    Eh, if he went to jail, it would be for about 30 seconds anyway. Probation is better. When he violates, he gets serious time….like at least a day.

  46. Jen

    He made death threats.

    But I suppose that counts for nothing.

    I don’t get all the shaming of Rihanna. She is clearly completely abused — to the point where she has been brainwashed by his bullshit and doesn’t even realise she doesn’t deserve this kind of treatment. She needs therapy — not MORE abuse.

    Why don’t more people have the same harsh words for Chris Brown? It seems all we’re getting is victim-bashing. HE is the guilty party here.

  47. Valerie

    Who wants to bet that one of Rhianna’s “fans” is gonna go vigilante on his ass?

  48. Erwin X

    The courts will be lucky to hand out a small fine for the inconvenience. If this stupid cunt Rihanna turns up dead later on, get ready for the deluge of candlelight vigils put on by groups of equally stupid cunt women representing the anti-domestic violence agenda. This stupid cunt Rihanna has no doubt been told already that she’s in a dangerous situation with this no-talent asshole, and that she (unlike other women) has the financial means necessary to be able to leave this asshole, but instead takes him back and all is well. This pisses me off because my own sister was a victim of domestic violence and it was a struggle for her to break free of the motherfucker because he wore a federal badge.

  49. Jrz

    Landing effective punches AND drivingn a Lambourghini? At the same time? That takes special skills. Is that a new Olympic event? Indy Car Boxing?

  50. Black Dragon

    Don’t white people have they own lives to worry about? What go on between a man and his girl is they busness and not nobody else. The girl love the man what more need be said?

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