Haha! Chris Brown Had A Seizure

August 9th, 2013 // 69 Comments

The headline covers it. We’re good here.

Source: TMZ / Photos: Getty


  1. i hope he dies soon.

  2. Ball Sack Kicker

    He needs to be beaten to oblivion with black mamba dildos by woman.

  3. Deacon Jones

    Bet’cha is was da syzzzzurp!

    Nuttin’ does a body good yall like dat!

  4. urmomhasaweewee

    i love you all!

  5. You sure he wasn`t just twerking?

  6. Smapdi

    Does FTD have a “Thanks for causing a seizure!” bouquet I can send?

  7. That’s just how black people dance.

    buncha fukin’ racists ’round here.

  8. I would have loved to been there and holding people back while I say “Let’s see how this plays out..”

  9. Hugh Jass

    Was it the kind of seizure that makes his fist swing uncontrollably?

  10. Cock Dr

    Given his “normal” behavior I’m mystified at how anyone would be able to determine that a seizure was in fact taking place.

    • Seriously. Let’s look up the symptoms here:

      - convulsion
      - difficulty talking
      - drooling
      - falling down
      - foot stomping
      - hand waving
      - incontinence
      - lip smacking
      - shaking
      - stiffening
      - swallowing (ha!)
      - sweating

      Yep, it’s a miracle.

    • Maybe he said something that showed self-reflection, emotional maturity, and modesty. That woulda spooked ‘em.

  11. Rihanna Nipples See Through Dress Chris BrownGrammys
    Commented on this photo:

    Are we sure this isn’t just a new excuse? “I’m not beating Rihanna, I’m just seizing. On top of her. With my fists.”

  12. wow i sincerely hope that his face slammed into his fist several times on the way down.

  13. Maybe it is time to rethink the whole there is no God thing Fish. ha ha ha

    I am trying to find some sort of decency and sympathy for this turd, but I just can’t. Oh well.

  14. This is worse than it sounds, guys–he appears to be all right.

  15. Batu Khan

    I’m no doctor but how did he have a seizure without a brain?

  16. Cock Dr

    Tell ya what though, I wouldnt mind sucking on his big pecker

  17. alex

    You guys are waaaaay off….

    “Hey, Chris Brown is seizing, quick, shove some sort of long phallic shaped item down his throat, ‘so he doesn’t choke on his tongue.’ Whatever’s handy….any old nearby, large cock-shaped thing at all….”

  18. How could he have a seizure in a recording studio?

    Isn’t he retired?

  19. cc

    Of COURSE he thinks his farts are hilarious. Ms. Menendez is about to offer a contrary opinion.

  20. You people are horrible. There isn’t anything to laugh about here. Chris Brown, had a seizure and he could have died. How can you laugh and make fun when he didn’t actually die? There was a chance for the world not to have to deal with this asshole ever again, and somehow he survived. How any of you can find humour in such an atrocity is beyond me!

    The King of the Assholes lived, people. We should NOT be laughing about it. We should be asking ourselves, “Why?” and trying to figure out if there’s any way we can prevent this from happening in the future.

    • cc

      I have to admit being crestfallen when I didn’t see ‘fatal’ in the headline, but you know, sometimes to you just have to laugh in the face of adversity.

  21. SM

    I actually am not celebrating this since I have experienced the pain of a seizure disorder and it is NOT fun. Don’t get me wrong, I hate the little douchebag, but this can be serious- especially when operating a motor vehicle. He will most likely have his license temporarily revoked.

    • Well, now that I know he might have his *license* revoked, I take it all back and wish him a speedy r– HAHAHAHA I CAN’T DO IT!


    • sorry about your seizure probs, but you’re a human. Chris Brown is not. Therefore, he deserves all of our vitriol. Thanks for playing.

    • They’ll have to find his Lamborghini first in order to get him off the road – and with that astounding camouflage job, it will be nigh on impossible. Drive carefully, people – it could be coming straight for you.

  22. I was praying for an aneurysm, but it’s a start.

  23. ChaCha

    Justin Beiber next, please!

  24. kieshanna

    I on’t understand why this is funny…like y’all mad childish. Never wish death or bad things to happen to not even your worst.

  25. Dick Johnson

    Just when I was signing off religion, God has to come and show he does exist.

  26. Jenn

    I have a seizure disorder. For days after, I feel like complete and total hell.

    Maybe they implanted a V-chip in Chris Brown’s head when he was sleeping. Hit em again, Shakey!

  27. Oh please let him have one while flying a helicopter with Ri-Ri, Lindsay, and Miley.

  28. Poor bastard had a seizure, huh? I sure hope it was nothing trivial.

  29. metal_gear

    I’m not gonna be so heartless and wish him dead, but if he keels over tomorrow.. I ain’t gonna cry.

  30. JungleRed

    I blame the pissed off looking Indian woman sitting behind him. She’s giving him the stink eye.

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