Hate politics? Let the pretty pictures of girls making out carry you away.
A little over seven years ago, I was renting an apartment from a stingy, old investment banker who at the time I should’ve pegged as, of course, deeply conservative and religious but the place was conveniently across the street from a bar, so it’s a miracle I’m remembering any of this. Anyway, I start a relationship with a girl and decide to have her move in which I figure is no big deal, it’s 2004, the town elders aren’t going to peg us both as witches. So I ask my landlord to put her on the lease, he asks me to come down to his office and what follows is a completely true story. As I enter the room, I notice he’s seated at the table with a Bible in front of him. He then asks me to sit down, condemns my living in sin and proceeds to literally read scripture at me. I take about a minute of this before informing him my dad’s a pastor, so he’s really not bringing any new information to the table and then point blank ask him if he’s going to keep taking my money or not. The next day he adds my girlfriend to the lease, and not a word of this is spoken again which is exactly what this reminds me of. Via Gawker:
In a letter addressed to Alderman Moreno and signed by Chick-fil-A’s Senior Director of Real Estate, it states, “The WinShape Foundations is now taking a much closer look at the organizations it considers helping, and in that process will remain true to its stated philosophy of not supporting organizations with political agendas.” In meetings the company executives clarified that they will no longer give to anti-gay organizations, such as Focus on the Family and the National Organization for Marriage.
Additionally, they have sent an internal memo to franchisees and stakeholders that stated that, as a company, they will “treat every person with honor, dignity and respect-regardless of their beliefs, race, creed, sexual orientation and gender,” and that their “intent is not to engage in political or social debates.” This statement was placed into an official company document called “Chick-fil-A: Who We Are.”
You see, despite the amount of bigots who showed up last month to hate faggots, I mean “Derfend f’eedom a speech!” Chick-fil-A found itself in the position to lose a ton of lucrative college dining contracts and so, like a Godly man of principle that he is, Dan Cathy immediately bent over and said, “I’ll be good.” Via The Huffington Post:
Reliable sources who do not wish to be identified at this time tell the HuffPost Gay Voices team that Dan Cathy, the fast food chain’s president, “welcomed campus leaders to a private luncheon in Atlanta on Thursday to discuss diversity, hospitality and the opportunity to find common ground.”
Of course, the most amazing part of this story has yet to come, and that’s when the blubbering evangelical masses cry “Censorship!” while completely oblivious to the fact that absolutely no one was censored here, and it’s free market capitalism who plunged the fried pickle straight into a willing Chick-fil-A’s bun. And, yes, John Travolta did teach me economics. How could you tell?
UPDATE: Turns out Chick-fil-A was pulling the age-old Christian move of lying for Jesus. Of course.