Charlize Theron’s Big Fat Gay Wedding

Superficial | November 23, 2005 - 12:30 pm

charlize_stuart_thumb1.jpgIf you’ve been waiting to find out when Charlize Theron and Stuart Townsend are getting married, you’ll have to wait a little longer – maybe. The two are planning to wed the day it becomes legal for gays and lesbians to wed in America. Theron told Extra, “We came up with a new idea that we said that we would get married the day that gays and lesbians can get married – when that right is given to them. We’ve decided that we’re gonna use that in a positive way, so the day that law gets passed then we’ll get married.”

Unless I’m mistaken, isn’t marriage regulated by the states? If that’s the case, they could end up getting married fifty different times. Which is all well and good, but I don’t know what kind of honeymoon they’re gonna have when Alabama finally gets around to legalizing gay marriage in 2060 or so. If you ask me, she’s just stalling. My hunch is that the real reason they’re waiting until gay marriage is legal is that Stuart Townsend is secretly a woman. And I base this on absolutely nothing.