Charlize Theron and Stuart Townsend are currently on vacation in Belize, and staying at the $2,500 a night Blancaneaux Hotel. And I know she’s frolicking around in a stream, but it wouldn’t kill her to put a little makeup on. She looks like her character from Monster. She could be going into surgery and she should be wearing makeup. Bikini pictures are supposed to make me smile and remove my pants, not wet myself and hide in the closet in shame. And by “wet myself and hide in the closet in shame”, I mean rip my shirt when I flex. These damn muscles are always getting in the way.
Ronda | August 7, 2007 at 4:06 pm
first fuckas!
jbomb | August 7, 2007 at 4:07 pm
first?
first | August 7, 2007 at 4:07 pm
First
Penis Mightier | August 7, 2007 at 4:08 pm
If a pasty dough boy like that guy can land Charlize, then it is scertain that I will soon be in the arms of my beloved Jessica Biel. I’m on my way my love!
Duchess of Dork | August 7, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Eh. She’s alright.
IMOA | August 7, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Picture 12-
Today’s post are brought to you by the number 1.
TVBrain | August 7, 2007 at 4:09 pm
“Fuck you for taking a picture of my backne!”
lisa | August 7, 2007 at 4:09 pm
She is swimming you idiot……..makeup comes off in water. Men don’t have a clue!!!!!!!!!!!
fa | August 7, 2007 at 4:09 pm
first not to say first?
i’d still hit it.
Penis Mightier | August 7, 2007 at 4:09 pm
By the way you first 3 posters are fucking pathetic wastes of flesh and space. Bo die. Now. Thanks.
Shallow Val | August 7, 2007 at 4:11 pm
I like her, she’s great, but she’s thin for a reason. She has a weird body, but she’s got an ass (thank Goodness). Bodies like that should never, ever gain weight.
lambman | August 7, 2007 at 4:11 pm
That’s one sexy African!
Texas Tranny | August 7, 2007 at 4:11 pm
I think that’s a cute bikini.
Annie Rexia | August 7, 2007 at 4:13 pm
I see seaworld finally got around to teaching shamu how to flip the bird.
Tim | August 7, 2007 at 4:13 pm
Wow, there’s something here for everybody! She’s not looking too…uh…glamorous; he looks like the ugly pasty paunchy mom’s-basement-dweller that all the female commenters describe when the guys are criticizing female bodies; and together, they’re unattractive washed out whiteys, in case anybody ever comes around to comment in a racial way. Howsabout we start with calling her “fat”?
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:14 pm
That’s so funny, I was going to say she loooks like that chick from Monster…but then I read the post and the Fish had beat me to it :(
Lovely | August 7, 2007 at 4:16 pm
Nice jobs # 12 and # 15- you clever fuckers you
Meggz | August 7, 2007 at 4:16 pm
Oh my god, Stuart Townsend has put on so much weight! He used to be really hot… ew….. I’m going to have nightmares about these pictures……
Italian Stallion | August 7, 2007 at 4:17 pm
I didn’t know the dead went on vacation or could swim for that matter. Her boyfriend must have on SPF 100 or some shit, or he thought this bitch was a ghost. Christ, get out in the sun a little more……………………………
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:17 pm
I think that guy with Charlize is number one too. Damn she looks ugly here and no boobs. Her little boy toy has more boobs than she does.
HEY FRIST WTC!!!!!
Stephanie | August 7, 2007 at 4:18 pm
people honestly think her face looks like it did in the movie Monster? christ.
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:19 pm
I’ve never been a fan. She’s hideous. Plus I heard she eats children and hates kittens……or is it the other way around? Wait, that’s right, she throws kittens at children. She eats bald eagles.
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:20 pm
Hello, Bite Me, didja miss me?
El Ces | August 7, 2007 at 4:22 pm
Heehaw!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARLIZE!
….I think;)
Walnuts | August 7, 2007 at 4:24 pm
man boobs
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:24 pm
@23 Yes, You never call me any more!!!! Did you get my e-mail?
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:25 pm
BITE ME!!! Where’d you go??? You know I only have 10 minute increments of time to surf fish!!!!!
WTC!!!
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:26 pm
@24 Yes she is 32 today
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:26 pm
Oh, there you are. I’m so impatient heh heh heh
bubba lubdubski | August 7, 2007 at 4:27 pm
really….this is hideous?
http://www.programtr.org/resim/program15/charlize_theron_black_dress_2001.jpg
too many transvestite loving gay men in the building….
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:28 pm
FRIST I am on my way to mow your yard!! Are you going to be in the pool again?
norton | August 7, 2007 at 4:31 pm
How low can a bikini bottom go before you actually see a womans’ clit. Seriously, look at that bottom….
Frick! | August 7, 2007 at 4:34 pm
Yeh she doesn’t look so great here, but then who wears makeup when they go swimming? Only vain or insecure chics. Anyways, forget about her…look at him! Yipes! I thought he was pretty fricken hot in that vampire movie. Now he looks like a pasty, doughy (angry) homosexual. And no, thats not a good thing.
p911gt10c | August 7, 2007 at 4:34 pm
meh, she’s already immortalized her hotness in Playboy. She don’t have to do anything to impress anyone 4 life. Though it wouldn’t have killed her to get waxed for that shoot.
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:37 pm
Yep I will be. See you then, and trust me it won’t be easy!!!
#30 When did I become a gay man?
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:37 pm
Hey Norton, how high up do you think a womens clit is? It is not the round hole on her stomach. I hope the is what you have been licking all these years. But that would explain why they never have a big O
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:38 pm
@35 I always have fun mowing your yard!!!
kellygirl57 | August 7, 2007 at 4:40 pm
When did Stuart Townsend get so pasty and doughy? Bleh! Didn’t he used to be cute?
FRIST!!! | August 7, 2007 at 4:41 pm
Awww…that’s so sweet!!!
And #36 was funny!!!
Lexoka | August 7, 2007 at 4:41 pm
There’s something wrong with you man, she’s beautiful. A little pale maybe, but that could be the light, or anything.
That guy, on the other hand… Well…
norton | August 7, 2007 at 4:42 pm
LOL @ bite me. Look at Pic 10. That’s pretty low… I mean, at that level she can’t have much of a hitler to speak of.
Truly | August 7, 2007 at 4:45 pm
Even in picture 10, if her pussy came up that high she would be having trouble keeping her guts in.
chimpy | August 7, 2007 at 4:47 pm
Agh she’s gone to the lions. Titless and fat. Not even a cute face. Maybe never had it, just make-up sheesh.
chimpy | August 7, 2007 at 4:50 pm
Whose the short fat guy fucking her?
norton | August 7, 2007 at 4:50 pm
Ahh, c’mon you guys use your imagination…. I WANT her to have an enormous twat, just because. Y’know with huge labia and everything…..
Bite Me! | August 7, 2007 at 4:54 pm
@41 Norton , yes the bikini bottoms are pretty low. Sorry, I just could not resist the cheep shot at you
Jabba | August 7, 2007 at 5:00 pm
For British eyes only!!!
mmmmm | August 7, 2007 at 5:08 pm
# 45. norton -
Maybe you’re right. Maybe behind that bikini it looks like a big muppet mouth turned sideways.
susan | August 7, 2007 at 5:13 pm
These pictures remind me of the no-makeup pictures of Heidi Klum awhile back. Same washed out look, same scary-angry eyes. “Monster” probably did give Charlize a chance to express her not-so-attractive side. There’s a reason why actresses and models plop down in a make-up chair in the morning and tell the flamer “make me beautiful!” Some don’t need the full treatment to look beautiful, for example Angelina back when she was fucking her brother and not adopting the world and dieting and turning into a brunette praying mantis. But somebody like Charlize probably looks fairly ordinary before the pros work on her. I do admire her refusal to get implants, even if it makes her boyfriend the hooterchick in the couple. And since there’s some question as to where her “landing strip” pubes are, I think they’re between his boobs.
Malffy Hernandes | August 7, 2007 at 5:13 pm
she’s ugly…