Charlize Theron’s Seen Michael Fassbender’s Penis

March 19th, 2012 // 35 Comments

During last night’s Human Rights campaign gala, Michael Fassbender presented Charlize Theron with the Ally for Equality Award which is apparently the proper venue for her to talk about how huge his cock is and her insatiable hunger for it. Suck it, intolerance! Via E! News:

Referencing Fassbender’s full-frontal work in Shame, Theron quipped, “I have to say that I was truly impressed that you chose to play it big. Most other actors would have gone small, trust me. No, I know because I’ve worked with them.”
The Oscar-winner didn’t stop there. “Your penis was a revelation,” she said to the howling audience. “I’m available to work with it any time.”

So I was tempted to suggest one of those small penises Charlize Theron worked with was Mark Wahlberg in The Italian Job, but then I remembered I sometimes fly places and who would save me from terrorism? Some pussy air marshal with no kids to look in the eye and say “Daddy’s got this?” Ha! Wait, is he a southie? Because maybe if he’s a southie.

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    Commented on this photo:

    Clearly we need Mr. F to come put a stop to this.

  2. H Albutt

    Will Smith, she’s talking about Will’s tiny willy.

  3. I don’t know if it gets any better than this.

  4. Deacon Jones

    Oh yeah????

    Well……., eh, i got nothing. He’s a movie star with a giant c0ck. This guy could throw kittens into a blender for fun and no one would take issue with it.

  5. Da Cheese

    So his X-men power was a big cock?

  6. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    Weirdo
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d eat her ass!

  7. merciful percival

    A post NOT having to do with the kartrashians, jersey whores, lilo, or rhianna?? Nice start…let’s see if you can make it ONE FULL DAY.

    • I don’t post comments on those wastoids anymore. No responses then maybe BUZZMEDIA will stop forcing Fish to expose us to those wastes of oxygen.

    • Of course, you, who bitches about it, bring it up instead of letting sleeping dogs lie (no pun intended). So now there IS a post about the Kardashians and the Jersey girls. Couldn’t leave well enough alone, huh?

  8. Oh Boy. Another site redo.

    BUZZMEDIA LEAVE THIS SITE ALONE. You can to what you want to the Kuntrashian, Kendra Slutkinson and websites such as those but leave The Superficial alone!

  9. Rapsutin's Evil Twin

    So she’s seen his equipment. May we see the resulting semi-pro sex tape? Please?

  10. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Heil Theron!

  11. Crabby Old Guy

    The way she licking her lips and holding that microphone, it appears he’s in for the hummer of his life. I hate him so much right now – unless he posts pix on twitter. Then I love him. Balls in his court – and her mouth (see how I tied it back together).

  12. Michael is the hottest man in Hollywood right now. Amazing actor, stunning, hot accent with a huge package. Charlize may have to keep trying; he seems to only date black women. Lucky :(

  13. Realistic Dude

    Meh, next to tiny dicks an average size one seems huge.

  14. Omg STOP changing the comments sections on your websites. The number of Geekolgie posts went down significantly when you changed the comment section there, just stop fiddling with them :P

  15. Cleavus Merryweather Eunitus Johnston Picklefinger III

    Little too much aryan

  16. El Jefe

    She is 36, single and just adopted a baby, a sure sign of desperation. Despite being a huge star, she would probably jump on anyone’s cock if they asked her at this point. That is the sad reality of being an aging woman. Thirstiness.

    She might want to give Ashton a call, he is one of the few that likes the older ladies.

  17. great looking woman

  18. turd da third

    I’d put the salami between those tities for some target practice. Maybe she should start a celebrity hard core porn company and legitimize all the f’in around.

    • turd da third

      Here are some of the new celeb pornos that could be released:

      Lindsay Goes Long
      Brittany Gets Speared
      Katy Does a Pair eh?
      Coco Plays With Her Nono
      Kardi, Life of the Party

  19. turd da third

    Wonder what she thinks of Eddie Murphy :)

  20. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    When it comes to Ms Theron I’m an Afri-can not an Afri-cunt

  21. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    I'm Fassbent
    Commented on this photo:

    Fassbender revealing his German heritage

    • W.C. Fields

      They have to make special extra small condoms for Germany because normal ones are too big so what are you driving at?

  22. Johnny P!

    We need more full frontal male nudity in movies.
    Why?
    Because every man and woman who likes films and puts their idols on a pedestal needs to see that some of the handsomest and most talented ones have tiny peens (when they’re not hard), aaaaaannnnnnndddd who gives a shit?
    Fassbender happens to have 7 (8?) inches when he’s not erect. Cool for him! He takes on challenging roles (and he’s a very good actor) that at times require full frontal nudity. Because he’s got a big cock (and is self-confident) he accepts the roles and takes it all off.
    Other actors who may be just as talented and self-confident as him but have all of 3-4 inches when they’re not erect (hell, they could be massive when they get hard… “I’m a grower not a shower” is a fact of life for a lot of dudes) will never drop the trousers on celluloid.
    So, this dude acts (very well apparently) in a movie (that’s very good apparently) and every review I’ve read alludes in some way to the guy’s peen.
    ???

    • kirby

      curious if we applied the same attitudes towards women’s breasts. ultimately for a man, a woman’s breast size does not matter, except to the very broken ones.

  23. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    Commented on this photo:

    Fake. Gay. Ice Cream Cone.
    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/19/charlize-theron-michael-fassbender-icecream-340_255.jpg[/img]

  24. Charlize Theron Michael Fassbender WonderCon
    hhh
    Commented on this photo:

    uh oh, that’s the Katie Holmes teeth-tongue fake smile.
    Look at that tongue. It knows what’s going on. It’s trying to escape.

  25. W.C. Fields

    She’s so over-hyped. Nothing special.

  26. Veronica

    Sex tape please. Can someone hack their phones already?

  27. Bull Run

    She’s a lesbian. She’s always been too tomboyish. Her boyfriends were all pussies. She just adopted a baby so she doesn’t have to deal with men. Her joking about Mike’s junk is obvious overcompensation and hiding in plain sight. Nothing wrong if she is a lesbian, she should just admit it to herself.

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