Charlie Sheen is Trying to Trademark His Catchphrases Now

April 6th, 2011 // 32 Comments

Continuing his quest to scrape together as much cash as possible so he can afford to pay his live-in hookers “goddesses” $30,000 a beeje, Charlie Sheen is trying to trademark 22 of the phrases he probably doesn’t even remember saying on account of all the coke and mangled va-pooter on his brain. E! News reports:

A California company called Hyro-gliff, which formed last month in the wake of Sheen’s odd metamorphosis and lists the address of the offices of Sheen’s attorney, Martin Singer, as its mailing info, is hoping to get its hands on, to name a bunch, “Adonis DNA,” “Tiger Blood,” “Defeat Is Not an Option,” “Violent Torpedo of Truth,” “Sober Valley Lodge,” “Sheen’s Goddesses, and “Duh, Winning.”
The paperwork was filed in batches between March 19 and March 22.
Sheen, who got in the merchandise business with event promoter Live Nation immediately after being fired from Two and a Half Men, has already had his various mantras and ad hoc catch-phrases printed on mugs, T-shirts and other ephemera—a fact that could give him a legal leg up when Hyro-gliff’s applications are considered.

I constantly hear arguments that Charlie Sheen has a net worth of $85 million and made tons of smart investments, but the guy himself openly admits he’s broke because he pays out (and up) the nose for sex on top of $100,000+ in monthly spousal support. Christ, his goddesses probably make more than he does right now and with less whoring. At this point, they probably throw crumpled up bills in his face then make jokes about rolling him up in a shower curtain. “Why don’t you get out on your stage corner and say ‘Tiger Blood’ again, you feckin’ slut? Yeah, that’s right, get outta my face. Oh, wait, can you sign my paycheck?”

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. me

    Desperate!

  2. RasputinsLiver

    *

    Damn!

    Time is not on Charlie’s side. He looks older than his dad. Worn out and ragged looking, man.

    Can he survive. Is he his generation’s Keef? Very few can live like Keef and live to talk about it.

  3. MarkM

    I’ve already copywritten one of his future phrases: “Oh my God…what have I done? I had it all. Goodbye cruel world. click. click. BANG!”

  4. Charlie’s security guy in the back is saying “I’ve got the yakuza assassin in sight…he’s closing in on TigerBlood”

  5. kerri

    The goddesses are so ugly – he KNOWS that right??

  6. mandy

    oh my god. probably the best comments ever written.

    “Christ, his goddesses probably make more than he does right now and with less whoring. At this point, they probably throw crumpled up bills in his face then make jokes about rolling him up in a shower curtain. “Why don’t you get out on your stage corner and say ‘Tiger Blood’ again, you feckin’ slut? Yeah, that’s right, get outta my face. Oh, wait, can you sign my paycheck?””

    you are genius. please marry me.

  7. The baseball cap states it all,”Loser Arsehole Fucken Douche!” Fuck me He looks old.P.S. whos that on his left? Bart Simpson- “What part of Giddy Mao! don’t you understand?”

  8. Roberta

    BTW, Charlie called out Miley Cyrus at last night’s show, but she wasn’t there…. LOL

  9. cc

    Oh, I like the next scene where the guy falls on the Cobra and 007 starts chasing the bad guy.

  10. Snooki's Taint

    Hunter Thomson is looking good for a man his age.

  11. zomgbie

    im copyrighting “2mil an episode to zerotown. lmao.”

  12. zomgbie

    im also copyrighting
    “LAFD = LOSER ASS FUCKED DUD”.

  13. Mandi

    That… security guy……. is my new best friend.

  14. sasha

    Please, somebody make him go away.

  15. lils

    He looks same age than Lohan…

  16. Your Mum

    You can’t get more chinese than that face and is that Sheldon Cooper as security in the back….”Penny,Penny,Penny!”…..or on this case ….”Charlie,Charlie,Charlie!”

  17. Charlie Sheen Trademark Catchphrase
    Bangbang
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh god… he aged so much x_x
    Saggy skin

    I used to think he was good looking :S

    • dude

      My thoughts exactly. I just went to the wikipedia article about him to find out how old he actually was and there’s a picture of him from 2009 and it looks like it’s from 15 years ago.

      Drugs are really a wonderful thing…

  18. Charlie Sheen Trademark Catchphrase
    Bangbang
    Commented on this photo:

    That guy with the earphone thing is HOT

  19. You know, if the Chinese want to stop being referred to as “inscrutable”, they need to knock it off with those facial expressions.

  20. That dude in the back has the sexiest ear-ache ever.

  21. I created “Duh, Winning”. What did you ever do? Not jack-shit probably.

  22. puddleduck

    Hope the HIV virus isn’t in that tiger blood….

  23. the captain

    I know charlie: LIFE IS HARD!!

  24. Vice Magnet

    He looks like the smoking man in the X-files. Christ he looks old.

  25. Shana

    He needs to sloooow down. He looks old!

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