Charlie Sheen Accuses ‘Goddesses’ Of Taking His Money Which I Thought Was The Deal?

In an open letter to TMZ, of course, Charlie Sheen accuses two of his former “goddesses” of racking up his American Express bill behind his back. Which is amazing because I could’ve sworn these porn stars were sleeping with Charlie Sheen because of his looks, charms, and manic depressive bouts of violence. But all they wanted was his money? For shame:

In fact, when we reached out to Charlie about the situation — he fired-off one of the most Sheen-ish statements of all time … telling us, “I’ve observed more nobility and honor in the drifters I’ve run over and child molesters I spit on at Pelican Bay.”
It gets worse — and far more graphic — at one point he says they’re worse than “the cancer known as Brooke [Mueller].”

The best part of this story? I absolutely believe Charlie Sheen runs over drifters before hunting down pedophiles to spit on. Because he’s really in a position to judge. “Hey. Hey, you puke stain. I look down upon you with a right and true justice, pal. On the way over, I killed a drifter with my car. You know what a drifter is? Homeless scum. I kill homeless scum. Now get over here so I can spit on you for fucking kids. That’s your punishment. HOCK-TOO. At least I have the decency to hire porn stars, the thieving cunts. Now get outta here!”

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Splash News