BREAKING: Catwoman is a Stripper

August 8th, 2011 // 53 Comments

“Just a few more shifts, Selena, and then you can finally afford cat college. Granted, you’ve had the money for a while, let’s just do a few more, for at least another year. — Two more years, two more years and we’re out.”

Via Batman-News.com and by breaking I, of course, mean Friday:

Catwoman is apparently one of the most well written characters we’ve seen in these movies so far and she could potentially steal the show the way Heath Ledger did last time. She does some cool stuff in the movie like jumping out of windows and stealing the Batpod. Her back story is that she has a history of abuse and works as a stripper and is also a pickpocket.

I like how they felt the need to mention a history of abuse and pickpocket while mentioning she’s a stripper. Has anyone met a stripper who’s not both of those things plus not secretly a hooker? It’s like trying to find a unicorn.

NOTE: Included two set videos after the jump that cross the line of what I want to see as far as spoilers, so judging entirely by the screencaps, it looks like Bane and Batman go to a football game together and find the music of each other’s hearts. That’s what I’m going with.

Photo: INFdaily, Splash News

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  1. what?

    i can’t imagine anne hathaway as a stripper…. but i couldn’t imagine natalie portman as a stripper either and she did that.

    • Anonymous

      I agree show tits or it didn’t happened. At least with Portman, she showed tits in the movie.

    • Facebook Me

      Anne Hathaway doesn’t have enough anger issues to be a stripper.

      After all her last 27 movies were about being the frumpy, dumpy girl, turns glam and everything is dreamy in the end. *Sigh.*

    • Just a California Guy

      She fails as Catwomen. She would not get $1 out on most men, we like Curves.
      Now based on the next post down Lacey Schwimmer would make a GREAT Catwomen, and stripper.
      Fish, it was not fair (but funny to but a Bland Anne right after Lacey Schwimmer. Anne never had a chance.

  2. Frank Burns

    I thought “she has a history of abuse and works as a stripper and is also a pickpocket” was the plot-line of Mtv’s “Teen Mom”.

  3. Anonymous

    What the hell happened to Anne Hathaway. At one point she used to be smoking and had a great set of tits.

    Now she looks plain as hell, her tits all but disappeared, her nose seems to get bigger every year and her lipstick keeps getting darker while her skin keeps getting paler.

    Bitch is a vampire.

  4. Vivian

    her catwoman outfit is hideous, it doesn’t show any skin, if she were wearing halle berry’s outfit maybe I’d buy her being a stripper, otherwise no, I just can’t see it.

  5. Karl Walden

    I would like her doggy – style and often

  6. SIN

    Anne Hathaay just isn’t cut out to play either Catwoman or a stripper. It’s just not her, plus she doesn’t have that type of a body to pull it off. Need Jessica Beil or Charlize Theron to play that part.

    • Shyt

      I agree but it’s not just her body–it’s also her face. She just has a nerdy, dorky face that is not sexy.

    • Gray

      Jessica Biel would be a better Catwoman, she has that inherit sex appeal that all Catwomen before exuded. Anne lacks it even when she does nudity like she did in Havoc. She was a bad girl but was so unconvincing as a bad girl because she didn’t do anything in it like the other chick did. She was the “nice” bad girl, if there is such a thing. This part looks like Anne is just playing dress up for Halloween. She looks like she’s just going through the motions. I’m not convinced nor interested in seeing her in this role. Bad choice and she may be the George Clooney of Catwomen.

  7. this mean she’ll get naked in the picture? can’t think of any other reason to watch one more remake than at least a naked ass. and i don’t mean body double, bitch

    • TomFrank

      No way in hell this movie risks an R rating. No way.

    • Johnny Cage

      It’s just a back story to make it look more relative to real life. It’s one thing Nolan is known for in his trilogy, just like dracula overtones were in Tim Burton’s version, and cartoon camp was in Schumaker’s movies.

  8. Edgar Gascoyne

    She would never need to use tubular vegetables again if I was in her life . I can easily replace the cucumbers with my enormous manhood

  9. Carl Spackler

    Man Overboard ! I would give her my special monkey love !

  10. Anne Hathaway Dark Knight Rises Catwoman Stripper
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Look at those spindly legs. She just doesn’t have that sexy figure to play this part.

  11. Richard McBeef

    BREAKING: Anne Hathaway is a cunt

  12. See Alice

    Anne Hathaway is so average looking .
    Kelly Brook would have been a better choice .

  13. Cock Dr

    Catwoman appears to have left off at least some of her undergarments. Hey, it’s summer & she doesn’t really NEED a bra.
    Wonderful squash blossom necklace. Very nice indeed. If you’re gonna wear enormous native American jewelry then do it one piece at a time.
    Some other celebs could benefit from that lesson (Cher & pumpkinhead Cyrus come to mind).

  14. Elihu Smails

    I would get her so wet we could remake the “Poseidin Adventure”

  15. I don’t know about all this movie stuff, but I do know that Anne Hathaway would be in deep shit if she needed $20 from me for a dance.

  16. Anne Hathaway Dark Knight Rises Catwoman Stripper
    Gray
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, just don’t see her being a bad ass Miss Disney princess. She wasn’t that convincing as the bad girl in Havoc, even with the nudity.

  17. Objac

    I don’t want to sound like a butt hurt comic book nerd (but essentially I am), but go fuck yourselves for posting a spoiler in a headline. It’s one thing to post spoilers in an article, because people can avoid them. Stick with what you’re good at like getting somebody trying to stick a camera up Selena Gomez’s skirt or repost some images of fat-shit-Coco trying to make people think she’s “sexy”.

    • Objac

      I guess I should clarify that it’s not the info itself that is the problem. But the lack of discretion in what goes in the headlines & front pages. Now to people who know comics, yeah it’s nothing they didn’t already know, but to the tons of people who don’t know anything more about Catwoman other than “bitch steals things in tight leather outfits” it’s more of a problem. That being said, I am glad they kept the videos in the article hidden. So it’s one of those “you did this right, but fucked up here” situations.

  18. Anne Hathaway is apparently the Mr T of turquoise

  19. Chupacabra

    She’s wearing like an $8000 squash blossom Navajo necklace. I guess she stole that, too.

  20. Frank Burns

    Maybe there is a typo in the script and they thought the character was “Flatwoman”, because bitch ain’t got no curves!

    Ha! ‘Flatwoman’! That moniker will be quoted everywhere . . .

  21. comic nerd dweeb

    Well, it makes sense that Catwoman is a stripper since that’s what she was in the comics starting out, it’s not exactly Nolan’s complete choice just for the sake of being realistic. You people are so ignorant when it comes to comics.

  22. the one

    with that size of breasts?
    ……….SHE WAS A BOY FIRST?

  23. I happen to llike Anne Hathaway very much, which is odd because I’m usually drawn to women who are more “zaftig” and buxom. As far as her performance and whether or not she is able to do the character justice (this may sound really stupid), but I think I’ll wait until I see the movie before I judge.

  24. Bee Bee

    Firstly, anyone calling this woman plain or ugly is asinine and needs their head checked. Sheesh. Half you ugly monkies can only dream of looking as beautiful as her or of dating someone like her. Secondly, you have haven’t watched the movie yet so stop being dumb and judging too early.

    • butt juice

      A) I enjoy my life-like skin color, and wouldn’t possibly trade it for a complexion of that…hue.
      B) The only reason I would have sex with her is because of her paycheck.
      C) Said paycheck is the only reason I would be “jealous” of her.

      Questions?

      I want to trust Christopher Nolen on this one but I just can’t with this bitch. Just can’t. Too cotton-candy for Catwoman.

  25. Said what

    Catwoman doesn’t have a solid background. This one background is frank millers version in year one.

    Wiki her and you’ll see all of her different version backgrounds.

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