AdWeek has put together a list of the top ten celebrity endorsement deals, with Catherine Zeta Jones topping the list at $20 million from T-Mobile. The complete list is:
1. Catherine Zeta-Jones, T-Mobile: $20 million
2. Angelina Jolie, St. John: $12+ million
3. Nicole Kidman, Chanel No. 5: $12 million
4. Jessica Simpson, Guthy-Renker: $7.5 million
5. Gwyneth Paltrow, Estee Lauder: $6+ million
6. Charlize Theron, Dior: $6 million
7. Julia Roberts, Gianfranco Ferre: $5 million
8. Brad Pitt, Heineken: $4 million
9. Scarlett Johansson, L’Oreal: $4 million
10. Penelope Cruz, L’Oreal: $4 million
I’m just glad these sons of bitches can make more money talking about a cell phone plan for 30 seconds than I’ll ever make in my entire life.
thegabi | April 25, 2006 at 7:51 am
First!
I’ve never even seen or heard of any of these adverts..
jkough | April 25, 2006 at 7:51 am
that’s just sick
Vampyreska | April 25, 2006 at 7:54 am
Brad Pitt? Heineken? I am sure I would have remembered seeing that one.
Vampyreska | April 25, 2006 at 7:57 am
Here’s a link to the Brad-Heineken commercial if anyone is interested:
http://www.goyk.com/video.asp?path=1395
mamacita | April 25, 2006 at 7:58 am
Well, Catherine Zeta-Jones needs all the money she can get. She’s funneling most of it into some serious R and D for when Michael starts pissing himself, looking like a stroke victim, and begins suffering from impotence. Oh, wait. That’s now. Well, then, BITCH pony up!!!!!! Mama needs a new car.
reptilicus | April 25, 2006 at 8:00 am
Hmm. I’ve only see the T-Mobile ads on tv. I’m assuming the rest are either print ads or are shown in the European or Asian markets.
jkough | April 25, 2006 at 8:04 am
If that ad cost Heineken 4 mil on Brad’s paycheck alone, they got ripped. I’d've done it for 3 mil :)
biatcho | April 25, 2006 at 8:49 am
Have you ever noticed in the T-Mobile ads that the normal people aren’t even in the same room as CZJ when these ads are filmed? You can tell she films them on her own & then they add the regular folk and blend the two together in post production. God forbid she is touched by a peasant who is only making $25 for their part in the ad! “Michael, I think one of them looked at me and it made me feel ugly inside!!”
masekid | April 25, 2006 at 9:33 am
#8: I believe she stipulated in her contract that the ‘normal’ people must stay at least four feet away from her. But when has a celebrity ever really been demanding like that? Oh, wait..
—
http://www.betterthanyou.org
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 9:52 am
Del Taco once gave me five dollars to not tell anyone about the dirty condom I found in my burrito, which was pretty much the price of the burrito. I’m surprised my free burrito endorsement didn’t make it in the top ten – being that I’m incredibly hot and famous.
Jacq | April 25, 2006 at 10:10 am
Ugh! She bugs me. Congrats on the marriage to ol’ wrinkle ass. I’d spend all of that $20 million to get that image out of my head.
Jacq | April 25, 2006 at 10:14 am
For anyone who cares, the Este in Estee Lauder is spelled incorrectly as is Gianfranco Ferre. But, we can spell Heineken dead-on. God I love this place.
PapaHotNuts | April 25, 2006 at 10:23 am
Other celebrity endorsements:
Britney Spears, Natural Light: $200 per month, free weekly keg
Michael Jackson, Gap for Kids: One young small Latino boy per day
Star Jones, Buffet King: One free buffet every 6 minutes
Edna Bambrick, Fire & Brimstone Sales Inc.: One Wrath of God a month
Please help me out with more. Too stupid this morning to think.
sharkbite | April 25, 2006 at 10:31 am
Good god, that is some money.
I want to endorse T-Mobile. I’ll even endorse something I completely hate for $20M.
http://www.wehateeverybody.com
Italian Stallion | April 25, 2006 at 10:37 am
Rosie O’donnell: Hanes underwear with Dick Holes in em: Years supply
Tom Cruise: The Thunder stick: Lifetime supply
Whitney Houston: Mr Clean bathroom addition: Can’t give money to a crack whore
Barry Bonds: Hyperdermic needles: Steriods to fill them
Phoenix | April 25, 2006 at 10:42 am
Slightly off topic but when the fuck did Catherine Zeta Jones lose her Welsh accent. In films maybe but in real life too? WTF?
Feed_Me_Chocolate | April 25, 2006 at 10:43 am
Paris Hilton: Summer’s Eve Douche: lifetime supply, or until her snatch shrivels up and and dies.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 10:49 am
PapaHotNutz – Tigerbalm: $30,000 per minute and a lifetime supply to keep his nutzzz nice and hot.
MeganHarris – Radiohead: Free T-shirts and studded belts for roadie rim jobs and her famous “Chai Tea Beard” trick.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 10:57 am
Mariah Carey – Estee Lauder: 18 barrels of nacho cheese, 34 gallons of bronzing foundation, $17,050 worth of Nair products, and a big ol’ jar of pickles.
Dr.Rokter | April 25, 2006 at 11:02 am
Pet Doherty – Public Service Announcements: reduced sentence.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 11:07 am
Britney Spears – Wal-Mart: Free men’s sweatpants, unlimited supply of recalled baby furniture, and a big ol’ jar of pickles. Them fat sluts love them some pickles.
BigJim | April 25, 2006 at 11:12 am
Charlie Sheen — Everlast — free boxing gloves
David Spade — eHarmony.com — get’s to fuck Heather Locklear
Katie Holmes — Scientology — get’s to go on living
Janet Jackson — Wonderbra — Uh, I got nothin’
Sorry, those were all pretty lame. I suck.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 11:16 am
BigJim – Labatt’s Blue: Awesome bench press machine, every copy of South Park ever made, Matt Stone and Trey Parker inflatable love dolls, and a dartboard with George W.’s face on it so he can “stick it to the man”. Right on!
PapaHotNuts | April 25, 2006 at 11:29 am
Elton John, Anal Eaze Lubricants: One Case a day
Rosie O’Donnell, Anal Eaze Lubricants: One Case a day to spread on anus & cheeseburgers
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh,Anal Eaze Lubricants: One Case an Hour when I’m visiting
The State of Louisiana,Anal Eaze Lubricants: One Case per hurricane so we don’t get fucked so hard again
Slysaucy | April 25, 2006 at 11:29 am
can you hear me now?
Spindoc | April 25, 2006 at 11:37 am
Gwenyth Paltrow for Estee Lauder?! I can’t see her endorsing cologne, she looks like she smells like Boiled Cabbage.
I will defend the Zeta Jones on this one…All the other celebs I have never seen their ads, but her ads at least are running all the time.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 11:48 am
I must say it puts me at “Eaze” to know the good people at “Anal Eaze Lubricants” have got my back in case Papa Hot Nuts comes to Monroe with butthole on his mind and a song in his heart.
Gerald Tarrant | April 25, 2006 at 11:54 am
*makes note, Monroe, north part of my state*
gogoboots | April 25, 2006 at 11:55 am
Do they even use these products? NO, it’s for the us peons to idolize this shit because their name is attached to it…for like 30 seconds!
boredmilf | April 25, 2006 at 11:56 am
Edna’s on the brit page!
Ms Crackalackin | April 25, 2006 at 12:04 pm
Anyone who has T-mobile as a provider is a dumbass. What kind of company spends $20 million dollars to have the face and voice of a greedy, tacky biatch married to a wrinkled ass for his money?? What kind of company wants a litigious and shallow and aging actress to represent them? I can only imagine how their customer service is since they spend all their money on Catherine Skank-Jones.
UNWASHEDMASSES | April 25, 2006 at 12:15 pm
Used to think Zeta-Jones was hot, but the thought of her banging a guy a year older than her father kinda does it for me. The 20 mil is more action than Michael “Gray Pubes” Douglas can currently provide. As far a celebrity endorsements, how about Katie Holmes and Cameron Diaz as “beards” spokeswomen? Paris Hilton maybe have her own celebrity line of Valtrex? The Britney Spears Invisible Car Seat?
TaiTai | April 25, 2006 at 12:37 pm
How about Chris Martin/Coldplay: Sominex
Mr Furious | April 25, 2006 at 12:42 pm
Heineken is not getting their money’s worth if no one knows the Brad Pitt ad exists…
MeganHarris | April 25, 2006 at 1:42 pm
Where’s Paris? Doesn’t she make around 4 mil for her dumb fragrance or somthing?
Italian Stallion | April 25, 2006 at 1:57 pm
MeganHarris no likey Paris Fragrance, MeganHarris really likey Paris voice in “screwed” though, which make me no likey MeganHarris…….
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 2:28 pm
They’re coming out with a MeganHarris fragrance. Word on the street is it smells like seared flesh and teen angst.
Trotter | April 25, 2006 at 2:41 pm
@33
Chris Martin’s has added a new client
Colt Handguns: One 45 semi-automatic, box of shells and a copy of Final Exit.
@35 I’m happy to make arrangements for Colt to hire you next.
dirtypiratehooker | April 25, 2006 at 2:55 pm
Britney Spears, Cheetos: $oh, millions
andrewthezeppo | April 25, 2006 at 2:56 pm
I especially love that Catherine Zeta Jones isn’t even on set with the others in the comercials. She films her stuff on bluescreen and they super-impose the other in lol…it’s why she always looks too big or too small compared to the others.
Pearly | April 25, 2006 at 3:10 pm
Most of the ads listed are made in and played in Japan. The stars agree to do these ads because they won’t be shown here and make them look like the seel outs they are (aside from CZJ who is 70, actually older than MD but he just won’t drink of her blood..smart guy.)
Pearly | April 25, 2006 at 3:35 pm
*sell outs. sorry!
cat | April 25, 2006 at 3:59 pm
to make everyone in Louisiana feel better – fifth thumbnail down on the left.
http://www.georgerodrigue.com/currentsilkscreens5.htm
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | April 25, 2006 at 4:20 pm
Thanks, cat, but that picture of the fucking blue dog will only make me feel better if it’s made out of vicodin. Is it?
Seriously, is it?
Pez_D_Spencer | April 25, 2006 at 5:58 pm
More endorsements:
1. Kurt Cobain: Winchester firearms, Remington ammunition, Dutch Boy paint (It WON’T Stain!)
2. Michael Hutchence: Bed, Bath & (into the great) Beyond.
3. George Michael: Port-a Potty
4. Sid Vicious & Nancy Spungen: Ginsu Knives.
5. Mama Cass: Hormel Ham, Wonder Bread, French’s Mustard
6. Karen Carpenter: Slim-Fast, Dexatrim, Ex-lax
7. Stevie Ray Vaughn: Bell Helicopters
8. John Denver: Cessna
9. Peter O’Toole: Bushmills, Powers, Tullamore Dew
10. Russell Crowe: SBC/AT&T
11. Phil Hartman: Beretta Firearms, Federal Ammunition
biatcho | April 25, 2006 at 6:12 pm
43: Did something happen in Louisiana? Why are they so sad?
TrannyGranny | April 25, 2006 at 8:36 pm
Edna, $4.00 American, Jesus Chips by Nabisco
Jessica Alba….damn lost concentration thinking about her ass. mmmmm Alba-Ass
TrannyGranny | April 25, 2006 at 8:44 pm
PH Nuts, are you sure that’s not “Gaping Kids”
cat | April 25, 2006 at 9:08 pm
oshkosh – vicodin; no. LSD; yes.
Drunk Blogger | April 25, 2006 at 9:51 pm
And to think, the people who appear in these commercials with the stars only make good money if the commercial airs a lot, and they probably have to work other jobs. Suckers. haha. Oh wait, I’m one of them too. Shit.