Catherine Zeta-Jones still hot but married to that old guy


Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas attended the benefit for the Motion Picture and Television Fund at Sony Studios over the weekend. It should be a crime for a woman that good looking to date a dude that old. I mean, yeah, he’ll probably die soon. (Keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow.) But Grandpa here should let young bucks like me have a chance. Maybe, instead of feeding you oatmeal and watching the History channel, Catherine would like to feel pecs that were chiseled from marble by Zeus himself. Sure, maybe he was a bit overzealous and gave me an extra nipple or four, but just feel those pectoral muscles. You can’t? Too many nips? Goddammit, Zeus.

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