Archive for the ‘Photos’ Category

Courtney Stodden & Doug Hutchison Are Engaged Again Despite Never Getting Divorced

August 12th, 2014 // 30 Comments
BEST OF 2013
Courtney Stodden Topless Implants Bikini
Courtney's Topless Implants Read More »

Courtney Stodden has been rapidly fading from relevancy yet is remarkably determined to not just throw in the towel and do porn which makes her a better person than Farrah Abraham. Then again, so is this bagel. Anyway, in a successful (because I’m a cheap clickwhore) Hail Mary pass to get back in the press, she’s announced she’s engaged to Doug Hutchison again even though they never legally dissolved their marriage in the first place. The important thing is that her mom decided the best cover story instead of admitting every single move has been a calculated business move from the start is that her daughter just wanted to get banged a lot. FOX 411 reports:

[Krista] Keller says her daughter has had time to “experience other men” during their break and she now “want[s] to be with her original choice, her husband.”

Krista added, “Now that she’s no longer interested in sex, marriage is the perfect place for Courtney to be right now. Think of it as a sanctuary. A fuckless safe haven if you will.”

Photos: Coleman-Rayner

Kendall Jenner Threw Money In A Waitress’ Face For Not Serving Her Alcohol

August 12th, 2014 // 41 Comments
'But I'm A Kardashian!'
Kylie Jenner Daisy Dukes
Shut Up And Drink Your Shirley Temple Read More »

Before I start, if you’re wondering why you’re looking at bikini photos of Kendall Jenner and Hailey Baldwin, this post involves both of them, so my choice of pics couldn’t be more relevant if Robin Williams was dangling in the background. (He would’ve laughed. Maybe.) Anyway, following in the footsteps of her younger, equally-as-entitled sister, Kendall apparently threw a fistful of cash at a waitress after a restaurant wouldn’t serve her 18-year-old ass alcohol and she tried to leave without paying. Page Six reports:

“Kendall got up and left and didn’t pay for all the food . . . about $60 worth, and without a tip.”
Her server, Blaine Morris (Betty Nardone on MTV’s “Skins”) ran outside to ask the celebuspawn to pay her bill.
“Kendall and Hailey started laughing,” our witness said.
“Kendall took a couple of $20 bills out of her wallet, threw them at the server and walked away, not even counting if it was enough or if it included a tip.”

In the meantime, while Kendall Jenner literally attempted to break the law, a black man was probably choked out down the street for, eh, whatever because racism is dead in America. Back me up, Missouri.

Photos: AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News

Carmen Electra’s Breasts Are A Happy Post

August 12th, 2014 // 12 Comments

The last few posts have been about suicide, child molestation and sexual assault, but since the night is always darkest just before the dawn, here are Carmen Electra‘s breasts at The Expendables 3 premiere because I’ll never forsake you. Unless it’d be really funny then I won’t even hesitate. You’ll be like “Ah, shit!”

Photos: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

Good Morning, Lisa Opie & Ana Braga Bikini Photos, And Other News

August 12th, 2014 // 6 Comments

- James Franco is a blonde douchebag now. [Lainey Gossip]

- Which apparently is how Kanye prefers Kim. Penis, too, probably. [Dlisted]

- The Minx In The Red Wet Dress is Valeria Orsini [theCHIVE]

- Selena Gomez‘s Teen Choice Awards speech was a little weird. [Fishwrapper]

- Ariana Grande‘s brother is a shitbag. [The Frisky]

- Goddamn, Genevieve Morton. [Popoholic]

- Why do Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick keep briefcases full of cash in their house? [Starpulse]

- Is Christina Aguilera looking at the baby, or her breasts that will slowly degorge? [tooFab]

- Luci Ford is still crazy hot. [Hollywood Tuna]

- A drunk, naked Michelle Rodriguez running through the mud, anyone? [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Monday 8.11.14

August 11th, 2014 // 436 Comments

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed, coming at you from a three-day that didn’t start with me watching my childhood get CGI’d in the nuts, so it’s from a good place. That’s probably why I decided to fill it with uplifting images like Joe Jonas and Antonio Banderas both handling their failed relationships remarkably well albeit via completely different methods. There’s also Jennifer Nicole Lee using the “just tear the band-aid off fast approach” instead of what’s usually a shocking foreplay revelation as well as the collectible David Hasselhoff spoon, which yes, of course, is specifically designed to scoop burger off the floor.

*opens window, inhales fresh air, notices majestic, soaring hawk, looks over at Fish sitting in the corner rocking himself, muttering* “Her fucking pets…they made them her goddamn pets..”

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

Paris Hilton Makes $347,000/Hour To Press Play

August 11th, 2014 // 35 Comments
$85 Fucking Million
Stephen Colbert Kim Kardashian App
Stephen Colbert Destroys Kim Kardashian's App Read More »

In a world where Kim Kardashian‘s app makes $85 million and Michael Bay movies dominate the box office, it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that Paris Hilton makes over six times the median yearly salary in the US in just one hour for pressing play. Page Six reports:

The 33-year-old hotel heiress has been living it up in in the Mediterranean where she’s taken up residency at Ibiza’s club Amnesia. Paris has reportedly made $2.7 million in the short span of four days on her two-month DJ tour.
“She’s making $2.7 million from the four nights – $347,000 an hour,” a source told The Sun (via AZ Central). “The crowds do seem to enjoy it but most are too off their faces to care that she’s simply pressed play on a Beyoncé megamix.”

When reached for comment, God responded: “What? I get bored giving little kids cancer. Sue me.”

Photos: INFphoto

Michael Bay Should Only Do This, Nothing But This

August 11th, 2014 // 15 Comments

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles might be a childhood-raping CGI abortion that already made enough money to greenlight a sequel because you people are the fucking devil except here’s Michael Bay proving he still serves a purpose in this world and that purpose is Victoria’s Secret commercials. Sure, any idiot can point a camera at hot models, but it takes a visionary like Michael Bay to dump them in the desert to see if their bodies will explode from the heat. And if not, there’s C4 in the trunk. And under the seats. — Alright, you got him, the whole car’s made of it. “Let’s light matches and bang!”

Photos: Pacific Coast News

Miley Cyrus Stole Nicki Minaj’s Butt And Made It White (Yup)

August 11th, 2014 // 35 Comments
Miley Cyrus Nicki Minaj Butt Anaconda

A while back there was a quietly brushed under the rug shitstorm about Miley Cyrus appropriating black culture, so here she is stealing a black woman’s body and Photoshopping it white which should put all of that to bed. Because if there’s one way to truly a respect a race, it’s essentially saying it’d look better with your white face and skin. This is better than reparations.

Miley Cyrus Photoshopped Nicki Minaj’s Butt After The Jump