Archive for the ‘Most Important People’ Category

The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.40

November 27th, 2013 // 57 Comments

So remember the other day when I said there wasn’t going to be a Most Important People on The Internet this week? Surprise! Apparently, you guys decided to goddamn bring it the two days we actually had a full set of posts, so here’s a robust sampling of commentical goodness to help you get through sitting at your parents’ house bored shitless. (On a tablet and hating the current layout? Here’s how to switch it to normal desktop view.) Think of me as the Ghost of Thanksgiving Eve who reminds your wife you probably had sex with your ex in the guest room you’re sleeping in now. You’re welcome.

- The Superficial

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Photo: Getty

The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.39

November 23rd, 2013 // 32 Comments

This pic doesn’t have a caption, but once you see why it’s here you’ll never be able to unsee it. Forever…

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People On The Internet which I want to sincerely thank you shitheads for making surprisingly robust because there’s not going to be one next week. In fact, we’ll probably mentally check out sometime after our AMAs coverage which I’ll assume involves an eyebrow-less Miley Cyrus eating the skin off papayas with her vagina detenta on stage. There’s no way I didn’t just nail that.

- The Superficial

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The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.38

November 16th, 2013 // 53 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet where at least half of these are of Lady GaGa so her label owes each of you a stipend for promoting her album vis-a-vis roofie and domestic violence jokes. You can’t buy that kind of publicity, but don’t let that stop you from taking hostages until you get a check. This is America. Harlan Ellison, bitches!

- The Superficial

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Photo: Splash News

The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.37

November 9th, 2013 // 44 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People On The Internet where quality is king, and quantity is but a Brazilian hooker Justin Bieber throws Pokemon cards at after he’s had his way with her. And by had his way I mean making her play said cards with him. Those bitches are Jigglypuff and they like it.

- The Superficial

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The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.36

November 2nd, 2013 // 27 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet coming at you with only seven shopping weeks left until Christmas, so more and more of you are probably standing in a mall right now convincing yourself prison can’t be worse than this. (It’s not, do God’s work, and yes, I’m specifically implying you burn down PacSun.) Fortunately, I shun society and all it’s Auntie Anne’s pretzel goods, so here’s a smattering of comments for those of you who’ve heard of Amazon and/or have also taken to pissing in jars because I honestly don’t why I didn’t do this sooner. They really capture the light.

- The Superficial

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The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.35

October 26th, 2013 // 43 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet featuring a cavalcade of shitamatazzery and, more importantly, an epic Paris Hilton visual gag that Deacon Jones nailed out of the park. Photo Boy served that low-hanging fruit up on a platter and you proceeded to have sex with it. That’s the kind of work I like to see here. (Adding… I love you, too, McFeely.)

- The Superficial

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Photo: Getty

The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.34

October 19th, 2013 // 34 Comments

Welcome to the return of The Most Important People on The Internet, our shit-tastic grab-bag of tomshittery you little shitters shit in the comments. You had to make do last week with Chrissy Teigen and Brooklyn Decker‘s Vagina Raspberry on account of a comment deficit – Thanks, Obama. – but this time I won’t make you watch two beautiful models make drunken queefing (queeving?) sounds because we’ve got a splendid bounty of ridiculous. On that note, special thanks to all the usual suspects: McFeely, Georgio, Crouton, etc., and to a surprising amount of newcomers who bravely stepped forward to make jokes about Justin Bieber living under LL Cool J‘s penis. You’re doing God’s work.

- The Superficial

Photo: FameFlynet

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 3.33

October 5th, 2013 // 38 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet which is a little lighter than usual but features the most brilliant comment I’ve seen since we started this feature in 2010. Whoever and wherever Gilberator is, I hope he’s/she’s being fellated/cunnilinged by beautiful islanders and worshiped as a god. Preferably one that’s not about to be thrown into a volcano, unless he/she’s into that. Yo-to-the-Lo.

- The Superficial

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Photo: Splash News