Archive for the ‘Most Important People’ Category

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 4.17

June 28th, 2014 // 15 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet that features yet another, remarkably robust showing and probably the best Tom Cruise joke I’ve ever seen in all my years of celebrity tit blogging. But enough about Midget Jesus The Levitating Space Prince, let’s get right into this week’s Long One™ which paints a scene so inspirational and heartwarming Christopher Reeve rose from the dead and kicked a horse in the face. I couldn’t believe it: More »

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 4.16

June 21st, 2014 // 31 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet where, once again, you people fucking brought it. And I’m not just saying that because of the Star Wars quote. Entirely. However, on a serious note, there were a remarkable amount of Hillary Clinton jokes to choose from which bodes well for her presidency. It’s time we got back to laughing at the Kabuki theater of politics that fucks everyone but the rich in the ass instead of going, “OHMYGOD A BLACK GUY!” The future looks bright. Anyway, a quick honorable mention to almost every single comment on this Khloe Kardashian thread (I couldn’t even decide, so I didn’t!), and now on to this week’s Long One™: More »

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 4.15

June 14th, 2014 // 54 Comments

Welcome this week’s edition of The Most Important People on The Internet where we gather up all the best comments from blah blah blah fart. Let’s talk about the Tom Cruise Asian kid. True story: Photo Boy had no idea he was even in this Lady GaGa pic (and is now rocking in the corner) until Deacon Jones pointed him out because that’s how boring her nipples are. How did he get there? Was he there the whole time? Did he make Lady GaGa look at him with his mind? Is he EVERYWHERE? More »

Giant Size The Most Important People On The Internet: Volume 4.14

June 7th, 2014 // 55 Comments

Thanks to the holiday weekend, last week was shorter than usual, so we didn’t have quite enough comments to justify a Most Important People on The Internet. Fortunately, not only did I hold onto them, but you beautiful bitches brought it this week, so we have a goddamn goldmine of horrible comments that will make D-Day look like a box social. And if you think that’s an offensive thing to say, those soldiers destroyed that poor beach’s self-esteem. Just destroyed it. It’s never been able to have a stable relationship since, and I heard sometimes it even cuts itself. Cutting! I hope stopping Hitler was important, jerks.

The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 4.13

May 23rd, 2014 // 30 Comments

Welcome to this week’s edition of The Most Important People On The Internet coming at you a day early thanks to the holiday weekend, and because Photo Boy and I are catching X-Men: Days of Future Past, so look for the usual novel-length review later today. But before I get myself gussied up, here’s this week’s Special Place comment that’s a load of nepotism all over your face: More »

Return of The Most Important People On The Internet

May 10th, 2014 // 38 Comments

As prophesied in the books of old, The Most Important People on The Internet has returned now that the FreckleTits have perished and Dem Babies have been offered as a sacrifice to the Terry of Uncles. Let us drink thirstily from its cup as it runneth over with jokes about Jon Hamm‘s penis and quotes from Tim Burton‘s Batman. Heil Baphomet, may he reign upon the land of cheese for a thousand years. (Did this put me on an Illuminati watch list yet? I made New Year’s Resolutions, dammit.)

EDIT: Almost forgot I had this gem marinating on the shelf: More »