Archive for the ‘Most Important People’ Category

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 20

March 26th, 2011 // 100 Comments

Welcome to the 20th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, and this week, I just want to say a huge, sincere thanks to how well you guys have taken to The Crap We Missed. It’s gone from pulling teeth to find great comments to Photo Boy (He’s gonna love that nickname.) and I literally spending each day deliberating over which ones make the cut. We practically had a knife fight over the two Kevin Federline at Subway comments until taking the wiener way out and posting both. (It was almost naptime.)

You had me at “I’d pee in her butt,”

- The Superficial

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Photo: INFdaily

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 19

March 19th, 2011 // 78 Comments

Welcome to the 19th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, or more aptly titled, “Ke$ha and Justin Bieber Get Molested By Your Words.” But before digging into to the smooth, commenty center, a special thanks to the following people:

1. Every single person on this Kirstie Alley thread.
2. “Satan’s Bitch” for finding Boner Boy by looking in a place that wasn’t Stephanie Seymour‘s huge breasts. I don’t know why someone would ever do that, but now I can call off the search and finally take off these goggles. (In case he jumped out at me.)

Vaya con Dios,

- The Superficial

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Photos: Pacific Coast News

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 18

March 12th, 2011 // 73 Comments

Welcome to the 18th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet making this feature old enough to vote and no longer something I have to hide from Chris Hansen. (I swear I never touched it there until today.) On that sexy note, I’m going to get out of the way of this beauty because not only is it a cavalcade of shitkickery, but it marks the first time I picked a comment from the previous week’s comments of the week post so it’s practically Inception. Are we in my dream, or the Asian businessman’s I lured into my basement with promises of Hello Kitty underwear? *spins top* DON’T YOU FUCKING FALL!

If my dead wife tries to shoot you, tell her I’m still waiting on those pork chops,

- The Superficial

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Photo: Splash News

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 17

March 5th, 2011 // 66 Comments

Welcome to the 17th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, and we’ve got a short gallery this time around which I completely understand. You had Charlie Sheen flaming out and machine gun-firing gold in the process that even I didn’t want to follow and that’s how I earn a paycheck. So on that note, kudos to the people who still brought it and it’s no surprise it’s names you see here week-after-week which has me contemplating some sort of “Commenter Battle Royale,” if you will. But more on that at a later date.

Last week, I made a list of commenters who made me laugh but didn’t quite fit in this type of gallery. So let’s keep that tradition rolling with a new list of Unsung Heroes that’s sure to go over so, so awesome. More »

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 16

February 26th, 2011 // 54 Comments

Welcome to the 16th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, and this edition is extra special because strategically placed within are every single photo from the Gary Shirley ass-crack post. Think of them as hairy landmines – with a tail. In the meantime, I want to give a special thanks to the following commenters who made me laugh this week, yet didn’t make into the gallery. The unsung heroes, if you will.

In no particular order:

- The Scientologists on the Bald John Travolta post who were ordered to comment how handsome he looks without his wig on. Your dedication to your faith is admirable even if it is under investigation by the FBI. That don’t mean nothin’.
- The “Infowarriors” who claim Alex Jones is a very serious “scholar” while simultaneously saying they only come here for the pictures. I know the words are hard, but goddammit, don’t you ever stop trying.
- Everyone who called me a racist for the Chris Brown thinks the Devil leaked the Rihanna photos post because – wait for it – I don’t “go after Charlie Sheen.” That just happened.

You’re all Daddy’s favorites,

- The Superficial

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Photos: Flynet

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 15

February 19th, 2011 // 170 Comments

Have a seat right over there.

Welcome to the 15th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, and Christ, did you people bring your game this week. It got to the point where my photo editor and I were getting into slap-fights over which comments to include until we made up over pedis. Totally straight work practices aside, I make a lot of cracks about the comments leaving me curled in the fetal position with a loaded gun suckled in my mouth each night, but in all honesty, it’s a grenade we have a nice little dysfunctional community here. Granted, I’d never take a bullet for any of you, in fact I’d use each and every one of you as a shield without hesitating, but– Well, that’s actually all I wanted to say there. The shield thing.

XOXO,

- The Superficial

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 14

February 12th, 2011 // 72 Comments

Welcome to the 14th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet which is light in quantity but heavy in Khloe & Lamar Beast Sex jokes. Thanks to our New York voyage we might’ve missed more gems than usual this week, so to make it up to you, I added a little something after the jump that should make us even, if not you in my debt.

Excelsior,

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start The Gallery

Video After The Jump