Archive for the ‘Hot Bodies’ Category

Good Morning, Amanda Cerny, And Other News

September 22nd, 2014 // 4 Comments

- Amy Adams is probably going to win another Oscar. [Lainey Gossip]

- Don’t pay money to see Lauryn Hill. [Dlisted]

- Future Lower Back Problems means big breasts. In case that was too subtle. [theCHIVE]

- Paula Patton is winning. [Fishwrapper]

- David Bowie does a better Tilda Swinton than Tilda Swinton’s David Bowie. [The Frisky]

- Rosie Huntington-Whiteley‘s breasts will sell you Coke with Stevia in it now. [WWTDD]

- 4chan convinced idiots to microwave their iPhone 6. [Death and Taxes]

- Goddamn, Emanuela de Paula. [Popoholic]

- Alicia Keys is naked and pregnant. [tooFab]

- What’s up, Mayra Suarez? [Hollywood Tuna]

- Kelly Brook still has giant breasts. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: FameFlynet

There Is.. Another.. Fappening

September 21st, 2014 // 60 Comments
There Is No God
Hilary Duff Legs Butt
Hilary Duff Fappening Pics Are Fake Read More »

NOTE: This is not a leaked photo of Kim Kardashian. This is the shit she gives away for free.

The last time I covered The Fappening our servers broke for two weeks, so if it’s Monday morning and there’s nothing but a crater where the site once was, avenge me. Now that that out’s of the way, apparently the FBI has not caught the hacker(s) responsible for the last glut of celebrity nudes because Saturday afternoon more hacked photos started appearing on reddit and 4chan. However, they were removed almost as quickly as they were uploaded just to give you an idea just how many lawyers are involved with this thing now. Shit, the guy who hacked Scarlett Johansson got 10 years in prison, so I’m pretty sure they’re going to bomb whoever did this because we’re talking about all the rich people now. And if you think I’m joking, here’s the list so far which just added Amber Heard barely an hour ago: More »

And Now Courtney Stodden’s Breasts

September 19th, 2014 // 79 Comments

Originally, I was going to write a post about Jonathan Dwyer head-butting his wife for not having sex with him, but then I saw these pics of Courtney Stodden’s breasts and decided we needed 30 photos of them because they look all weird. As for which of those topics would’ve opened a more beneficial dialog, who’s to say? Maybe there’s a young woman thinking about getting implants, but she has no idea that they can stretch your tits down to your knees. Or that it’s worth the risk anyway. We all have our own journeys.

Photos: HEDO/AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

How Dare Mere Muggles Tell Gwyneth Paltrow Not To Ride Her Vespa?!

September 19th, 2014 // 6 Comments
Martha's Out For Blood
Martha Stewart Gwyneth Paltrow
She Will Strike Down Upon Thee With Great Vengeance Read More »

Last year, Gwyneth Paltrow was filmed cutting off a school bus (above) with her Vespa as her daughter rode behind her because the laws of physics are a beggar’s game. Except apparently the lowly mortals who call themselves “school chiefs” felt they had the authority to dictate Gwyneth’s means of conveyance while sloughing her children into their ramshackle of a teaching facility. There’s not even a gluten-free tapas bar! What happened to education for the wealthy in this country? Page Six reports:

A source told us: “The scooters had been convenient for zipping around Los Angeles traffic, and dropping the kids off at school without having to wait with other parents and kids in the car-pool line. But after Gwyneth was photographed on the Vespa pulling out in front of a bus, school chiefs reprimanded her and said they’d rather she and Chris didn’t bring the kids to school on scooters.”

While Chris Martin‘s rep couldn’t give less fucks, Gwyneth’s has already responded and get ready for a giant horseshit pill to swallow:

“This story is not true. It was last year that they would occasionally drive the kids to school on scooters. This year, the kids take the bus.”

Gwyneth Paltrow’s kids take the bus. That’s what she expects us to believe here. Her rep could’ve said the children each ride a Pegasus that lands safely on the roof where it eats enchanted carrots until it’s time to go home, and I would’ve sat here going, “Yup, that happens. That definitely happens.” But the bus? Jesus Christ, lady.

Photo: TMZ

Jennifer Lopez & Iggy Azalea Hope You Like Asses

September 19th, 2014 // 44 Comments

So remember Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda” video? Apparently Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea did because here’s their video for “Booty” which makes “Anaconda” look like a shitty ripoff of “Baby Got Back” but with Nicki Minaj’s fake butt bouncing around. And if you’re thinking to yourself, “Wait, wasn’t it supposed to look like that?” poor Photo Boy just screencapped eight million asses. Why the hell are you even reading this? Are you on drugs? If you’re on drugs, your mother and I will get you help, but you gotta talk to us.

Jennifer Lopez ‘Booty Ft. Iggy Azalea’ After The Jump

Good Morning, Chelsea Heath, And Other News

September 19th, 2014 // 6 Comments

- Chris Martin‘s singing for Jennifer Lawrence at his concerts now. [Lainey Gossip]

- Matthew McConaughey is officially not in Magic Mike XXL. THIS WORLD MUST BURN. [Dlisted]

- Bouncing Breast GIFs. Don’t resist them. [theCHIVE]

- Lindsay Lohan looks.. healthy? No, that can’t be right. [Fishwrapper]

- GWAR has a new lead singer named Vulvatron. We live in a bold new age. [The Frisky]

- Cameron Diaz poses in her underwear for GQ Germany. [WWTDD]

- Anne Hathaway knows Tai Chi. [Popoholic]

- Gwen Stefani is straight up calling Adam Levine offensive in interviews. [tooFab]

- Anastasia Ashley‘s ass made a video. [IDLYITW]

- What’s up, Maryna Linchuk? [Hollywood Tuna]

- Bruce Jenner has to be trolling us. [Celebslam]

- Jesus Christ, Caitlin Stasey… [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: Fame/Flynet

The Other Models Are Mean To Kendall™, You Guys

September 18th, 2014 // 59 Comments

Kendall Jenner genuinely believes her modeling career is solely the result of “hard work,” and being like super pretty, but even models whose diets consist of a sprig of kale and heroin know it’s because someone who fell out of the same vagina as her got peed on in a sex tape. In Touch Weekly reports:

“The other models worked so hard to get a spot on the runway and didn’t think it was fair that she was there,” a source tells the new issue of In Touch, revealing that as revenge they decided to mess with her.
“Some [of the models] put out their cigarettes in Kendall’s drink!” the source explains. “They thought she was getting special treatment and just weren’t OK with it.”

“NO, NOT CIGARETTES IN HER DRINK! Is she alright? We should probably call the police. — Or In Touch. They would probably buy this. Tell her, um, tell her mommy’s handling this, and she did the right thing by talking to somebody, and of course we won’t tell anyone about it because then the other girls will know she snitched. I know have their number somewhere…”

Photos: Getty

A Lady Gaga Post? Okay, Why Not?

September 18th, 2014 // 25 Comments

So remember Lady Gaga? Weird nose, kind of a Madonna thing going on? It’s not important. Anyway, here she is in Athens yesterday where she did a bunch of stuff with her tits and ass which I’m now posting on the Internet for people to get boners from because journalism isn’t always NFL players beating women and children with abandon. It’s sometimes butts.

Photos: INFphoto, Splash News