Archive for the ‘Hot Bodies’ Category

Justin Bieber Ditched Selena Gomez For The Kardashians

October 1st, 2014 // 16 Comments
You Let Him Near Models?
Justin Bieber Strips Underwear Fashion Rocks
Have You Learned Nothing?! Read More »

So here’s how Selena Gomez‘s trip to Paris Fashion Week went:

1. Before, or as soon as, she got there, Justin Bieber checked into a hotel with Kendall Jenner.
2. When she showed up to the same show as him later, he spent the entire time with the Kardashians.
And 3. When she gave up and went to a show by herself, she ran into Miranda Kerr, and here’s a reminder why that had to be awkward as shit.

If only there were some sort of common factor she could eliminate from her life to prevent these things from happening. Something she could easily discard like a bag full of vinegar and water. Think, dammit, think…

Photos: Getty, Splash News

Diddy: ‘Jennifer Lopez’s Ass Is A Work of Art, Kim Kardashian’s Isn’t’

October 1st, 2014 // 18 Comments
JLo Got Rear-Ended
Jennifer Lopez Leah Remini
Not Like That. Settle Down. Read More »

Diddy, or Puff Daddy, or whatever the fuck he’s called now (I vote for “Piffy.”) stopped by Access Hollywood yesterday where he referred to Jennifer Lopez’s ass as a “work of art” before completely writing off Kim Kardashian‘s as nothing special:

“[Her booty] is great. It’s a work of art. It’s something that will go down in history. Also her talent, her drive, her determination,” he added. “She will never give up. She’s a great friend of mine… that thing is just incredible.”
When asked if Kim Kardashian’s butt lives up to J.Lo’s, Diddy responded with an emphatic “no way!”
“No disrespect Kanye and Kim, but that thing right there is something special,” he said, still watching “Booty.”

In fairness, Diddy said all this while watching the “Booty” video, so he probably would’ve said the same thing about food and water if not breathing altogether. “No disrespect to oxygen, but that thing right there’s all I need in my lungs. — Mothafucka, I ain’t joking! Get me a snorkel!”

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Wiz Khalifa Might’ve Cheated On Amber Rose With Twins

October 1st, 2014 // 40 Comments
'Homewrecker!'
Kim Kardashian Cleavage Tight Dress
Amber Rose Is Quite Accurate Read More »

So Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose‘s divorce just got interesting (to me). According to Peter Rosenberg, a DJ on Hot 97 and friend of Amber Rose, she apparently walked in on Wiz banging fashion designers Jas and Ness Rose (above) who also happen to be twin sisters. Page Six reports:

“Amber walked in on him with two women at the same time,” he said. “Twins, twin sisters, twin biological sisters.”
Rosenberg also showed a since-deleted Instagram post of the rapper with the twins, fashion designers Jas and Ness Rose.
Rosenberg also contradicted claims that Amber Rose stumbled across the infidelity at a residence that Khalifa acquired after moving out of the couple’s house.
“It was a home. It wasn’t some new home that was just his,” he said. “It was a home that he had. That she slept in. That’s how she got in. She had a key. This wasn’t some separate thing. It’s a place she goes to.”

Keep in mind, Kanye West allegedly cheated on Amber with Kim Kardashian which is kind of like twins if you count both of her ass cheeks as separate people which I do. Although, that would technically make it a foursome, and if you factor in the size of her breasts, that’s two more people, so really Kanye cheated on her with a bus. An entire bus. Things could be worse is the point I’m trying to make here. Now. After all that.

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Photo: Facebook

Ben Affleck’s Penis Is In A Movie

October 1st, 2014 // 11 Comments
Previously In Penis
Jared Leto Penis
Jared Leto Should Get That Looked At Read More »

Ben Affleck can’t do a single interview without being asked about Batman, but somehow he managed to crack the Internet’s secret code and started talking about his dick which is like dangling a set of keys in front of us. I don’t even know where I am anymore that’s how distracted how I am. Whose desk is this? And why are there blueprints to Hilary Duff‘s house all over it? MTV reports:

“It’s ironic, because David [Fincher] said to me from the beginning, this is a warts and all movie. It can have no vanity. You have to see the naked underbelly of this character,” Affleck continued. And yes, when he says “naked underbelly,” he means it literally as well as figuratively.
“There’s some brief, ah, very brief nudity, I think,” Affleck hedged. But when reminded that people might well be going to see “Gone Girl” for literally no other reason than to get a glimpse of his wang, he capitulated.
The penis is in there!” Affleck said. “It’s IMAX penis! You’ve gotta pay fifteen bucks to see it in 3D… it’s better in 3D.”

Later that day…

“So your dick’s in the movie, huh?”
“Wait, they made me do- oh, God, your kicks are so strong!”

The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 (Call, Ben Affleck. It’s time.)

Video After The Jump

So I Guess We’re Doing This And Other News

October 1st, 2014 // 20 Comments

- Everybody’s in the Magic Mike sequel now except the one person who counts. [Lainey Gossip]

- Leonardo DiCaprio has selflessly left his girlfriend to bang all the women George Clooney can’t now. [Dlisted]

- Believe In Your Selfie provided you have breasts for it. I say that as a friend. [theCHIVE]

- Jaden Smith is making weird-ass music now. [Fishwrapper]

- Tim and Eric can be bought by GE. That’s the key takeaway of that Jeff Goldblum commercial. [The Frisky]

- Mommy Blogger‘s are still awful. [WWTDD]

- Satan‘s promoting Nicolas Cage movies now. No, really. [Death and Taxes]

- BREAKING: Men ogle woman’s breasts every second of every day. [The Mighty]

- It’s Hannah Davis in a bikini, so try not to think about Derek Jeter‘s butt. [Popoholic]

- I refuse to believe Justin Bieber had sex with this. REFUSE. [tooFab]

- Kim and Kanye got booed at Fashion Week. You’re alright, France. [IDLYITW]

- Jessica Simpson wears black panties. [Hollywood Tuna]

- Jenny McCarthy and Melissa McCarthy are feuding. [Celebslam]

- Ferne McCann is trying to get in on The Fappening. [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

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Photos: FameFlynet

LeAnn Rimes Might Be Cropping Herself Into Family Photos Now

September 30th, 2014 // 23 Comments
I'm Sorry, They Did What?
LeAnn Rimes Eddie Cibrian Luli Fama Fashion Show Front Row
Eddie & LeAnn Told His Sons About The Affair Read More »

As part of her ongoing war with Brandi Glanville, LeAnn Rimes may have taken her crazy to some next level shit by allegedly Photoshopping herself into a photo of Eddie Cibrian and his sons. Via Fishwrapper:

1 — The child immediately on LeAnn’s left looks cut in in two-thirds. Perfectly, flawlessly trimmed in two-thirds. I mean, have you ever actually even seen such a perfect silhouette blocking a Levi’s logo in your whole entire life? Probably not.
2 — Not quite sure what LeAnn’s resting her boot on, but it looks … well, being a non-Photoshop certified expert, the only terminology acceptable is “off.” Something about that floating boot looks off.
3 — We all know that LeAnn fancies herself something of a deity, but even deities cast shadows sometimes, don’t they? And I dunno about you, but I’m not seeing much of a shadow cast by LeAnn’s body anywhere, unlike that of Jake, Mason, and Eddie.

While all of that is compelling evidence, if you look close enough, I’m pretty sure the one kid (I’m not learning their names. Fuck you.) is touching LeAnn Rimes’ ass which he’d never do with Brandi Glanville, so who’s Mother of the Year now, bitch? POW.

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Photo: Twitter

Adam Levine & Behati Prinsloo Are Banging While Covered In Blood

September 30th, 2014 // 17 Comments

Here’s the video for “Animals” which features Adam Levine stalking his wife Behati Prinsloo like a hipster serial killer before banging her naked body covered in blood. It’s the sexual fantasy of any healthy marriage provided your husband wants to fuck himself even harder in a meat locker which is also the vibe I got from this. “Yeah, yeah, what’s her face’s naked, but did you see how much I want me? Fucking hot, right?”

Maroon 5 ‘Animals’ Video After The Jump

The Old Amanda Bynes Is Back

September 30th, 2014 // 28 Comments
Amanda Bynes Telly Video
WATCH: This Is How Amanda Bynes 'Gets Ready'

I gave Amanda Bynes‘ parents a lot of shit about their conservatorship because they seemed to be more concerned about her money and a little too quick to blame everything on weed instead of admitting she has a severe mental illness. However, to their credit, they did manage to keep her under wraps without a single driveway being exploded or reports of a Rolling Bong of Death terrorizing downtown. Except the conservatorship ended earlier this month and it took her all of three weeks to get arrested for DUI, so before I go any further, GET OUT OF THE ROAD. TMZ reports:

Amanda Bynes was arrested in Los Angeles Sunday after cops determined she was driving under the influence … and our law enforcement sources say she was on a STIMULANT … but we’re told she has also developed a serious weed problem … again.
Here’s what we know — Bynes was driving a Mercedes in the San Fernando Valley when she stopped in the middle of an intersection on Van Nuys Blvd.

We’re told Amanda has moved out of her parents home and is now living in an Orange County apartment. We’re told she has been smoking weed for weeks and things are bad again.

According to TMZ, Amanda was high on Adderall and from the sound of things, keeping her shit together for the past year had to be a goddamn chore because her parents basically let the conservatorship expire and are convincing themselves she’s all better now: More »

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