Carrie Underwood in a bikini

December 7th, 2009 // 163 Comments

Here’s Carrie Underwood in the Bahamas this morning and I really hope her boyfriend wasn’t along for this trip. Mostly because Carrie recently made it a point to say she would never live in sin, so even after an entire day of looking at her in a bikini, the most you’d probably get is a tepid handjob followed by lots of praying. Dammit, I swore to myself I wouldn’t write erotic fiction for Rick Warren, yet here we are.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Sher

    She would “never live in sin.” BS! She was a ho before American Idol. So it’s not living in sin if you just have your boyfriends buddy drive you around in his TransAm while you screw in the backseat… Classy!

  2. dave

    I would stick my penis inside her vagina.oh yes.

  3. ada

    Here is a great place —— Cougarmatching.com —– It’s a premiere cougar dating community for older women seeking younger men and younger men seeking cougars. Come in, post a message, a picture of yourself and check out the hot photo galleries. You will find someone you like here…

  4. Smarms

    ” 34. Meh – December 7, 2009 1:34 PM

    Oh please; I really don’t like these hypocrite religious types. “Oh, I’ll never live in sin!”, yet she’s got a tattoo to the right of her pussy. Give me a fucking break; typical self righteous religious nutcase hypocrite. And, the chick needs a tit job; those 28 A tits ain’t cutting it.”"

    I’m not sure whose more fag-esque, you, or #15. I’d have to go w you though… by a nose. Those tits are ‘cuttin it’ just fine, and thankfully, no one really gives a fuck what you think.

    And if you’re that fucking stupid that you think a tat around her waistline means she’s promiscuous, then there really isnt much hope for you. You act as if she got a fucking arrow outlined w neon ink pointing to the trim that says ‘fuck me silly, im a closet slut’… and you’re calling HER out for being self righteous? Shut your cockholster you hippocritical little fuck.

    So, in closing lets see…. she has a bangin body, which you whined about (no doubt in an effort to sound cool by going against the grain when in reality if she came within 15 miles of you youd blow your load and stutter like a ruh-ruh-retard…. ) , and shes got a tattoo that in your feeble little mind, translates to ‘” I fuck constantly”.. ok, got it.

    Douche.

  5. StEvec

    #54 Smarms…..said:
    “I’m not sure whose more fag-esque, you, or #15. I’d have to go w you though… by a nose. Those tits are ‘cuttin it’ just fine, and thankfully, no one really gives a fuck what you think. ”
    ————————————-
    Anyone who used the term “fag-esque” to describe anything must be a fag !

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  7. Mike

    I would sniff this chicks farts directly from her asshole.

  8. Danklin24

    #20 i was being sarcastic dipshit. i know what you meant the first time.

  9. Carrie Underwood looks awesome in a bikini. The color of the bikini (green) suits her skin. LOL.

  10. Hardie

    WOW!

  11. Mister Lucky

    @56

    Hey, sweetie. Thanks for teaching us all how to Copy/Paste text. And shucks, you even know how to do it multiple times! Hmmm… maybe I’m giving you too much credit and you really did type each and every one. Either way, you’re still an annoying idiot slut bag.

    Why did you sign in as “That_Girl_Jenn”? Everyone here already knows you by your REAL name: FAT Girl Jenn.

  12. Googler

    Nice white trash tats. I’ll still jizz on her face though.

  13. YOU ARE REALLY HARD-UP LIKE SIMON

    If it wasn’t for Simon Cowelle’s many, many boners, Carrie UnderWEAR would be as famous as what’s-his-name.

    I was watching UnderWEAR’s Christmas show on the boob-tube, only to see Christina Applegate, and in 30 sec., I had to put it on mute. The skank can’t, doesn’t and never will sing worth a royal shit. First and foremost, she tries to mock your usual honky-tonk voice, and secondly, UnderWEAR sings through her nostrals/nose!!! A real singer is trained to sing from your guts, not your nose whether HIGH notes or low notes. Also, her sense of humor is compared with Rosanne Barr.

    After not being to take it anymore, I changed channels HISTORY ans watched Pawn Star. That was educational.

  14. Sheva

    She looks great. Good for her. Would love the weekend with her.

  15. hard boiled pegg

    Dam… that’s a nice meaty pussy. Distinctive toe so probably cleanly waxed, chicks waxed always suffer from the dreaded(for them) toe. I’d suck that batter our of her pussy and replace it with some of mine!

  16. t stamp ftw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  17. Rex

    It’s been a while since I jerked off thank you Carrie.

  18. jupiter Jack

    Nice lookin penis she’s got tucked up in there!

  19. WTF

    LOLZ WOW…LOOKS LIKE SHES GOT A FAT COCK TUCKED UP IN HER MOUND…LOLZ MUST BE A BIG ASS FUCKIN BUSH…WOWZERS ITS STICKIN OUT INCHES…WAZ DA FUX!

  20. Really nice one ! She has got so sexy figure. Tremendous photos i must say. Thanks a lot.

  21. Oh,so cute!I love her. Maybe she want to find more new friends, she is on ***____B B W c h a t s. C O M.____*** . There are many beautiful girls and rich, handsome men,they want to find more friends, find their lover. On that website, they make friends each other.If you are a single now, I think you would come to the website. Please believe yourself, you will find your lover. Come on!!!!

  22. That’s not a tattoo; it’s the padlock to her chastity belt

  23. Goot. Nothing to o special.

  24. Oh,so cute!I love her. Maybe she want to find more new friends, she is on ***____B B W c h a t s. C O M.____*** . There are many beautiful girls and rich, handsome men,they want to find more friends, find their lover. On that website, they make friends each other.If you are a single now, I think you would come to the website. Please believe yourself, you will find your lover. Come on!!!!

  25. That’s not a tattoo; it’s the padlock to her chastity belt

  26. Really nice one ! She has got so sexy figure. Tremendous photos i must say. Thanks a lot.

  27. cc

    “Stop watching pornos where chicks have had their labia fat sucked out”

    Ewwwwwwww, that doesn’t really happen does it?

    Anyway, if she ever gets fake breasts I will stop writing her letters.

  28. Yes, it does really happen. Ten years ago nobody believed me when I told them pornstars get their assholes bleached.

    ROFL @ Rick Warren’s erotic fiction.

  29. Rough 360

    That was some revelation Backwood bitch…

  30. Dave

    That is one fine bulge of a camel toe. HOT.

  31. RtSS

    Oh, my… After her “Holiday Special” on TV last night where she started out in black leather pants (painted on) and tigh high boots, I’d scrogg this sweet country chick with my schlong twice a day, and four times on Sunday. She would be worn out and have a gullet of my protein shake goodness. These pictures do indicate she doesn’t shave or trim down in the secret place, the love triangle. Looks like there’s hug bush land down there. Grooming is essential in the year 2009 and beyond, why do chicks just not get that? I even manscape to keep the short and curlies under control. Back to Carrie though, I wonder if that sweet bush is blonde?

  32. pappysmeary

    @37 definitely agree., very nice pudenda… nice beefy pudenda.. sounds like a country song that i will be writing soon

  33. smarm

    “55. StEvec – December 7, 2009 10:13 PM

    #54 Smarms…..said:
    “I’m not sure whose more fag-esque, you, or #15. I’d have to go w you though… by a nose. Those tits are ‘cuttin it’ just fine, and thankfully, no one really gives a fuck what you think. ”
    ————————————-
    Anyone who used the term “fag-esque” to describe anything must be a fag !

    Wow, that was almost witty…. It was called sarcasm, and a play on words. I know that’s a bit much for that feeble little brain of yours to process (but hey, at least it’s got more size to it than that fallace of yours) but hey, not everyone can have an IQ over 30. Keep trying though, tough guy.

  34. Pseudopodia

    #56, fatty

  35. JIM

    Please leave the stupid comments out. She’s hot and she’s not a Nun! Thank god!

  36. David Hasslehoff's Beer Farts

    She has the body of a man and the chin of Leno.

  37. Kelley

    She looks good !!! All natural.

  38. Bob

    Huh… a real world hot girl.
    As in the kind of hotness you might actually see (in person as opposed to pictures) on an unenhanced woman that you might possibly have a chance of nailing if you weren’t the kind of fugly loosers (and probable virgins) that feel the need to post on sites like this – I include my self in this (except, of course, I’ve nailed thousands of hot women).

  39. See Alice

    Tattoos ……. Oh gawd, another head case . Very disappointed .

  40. Steve O

    “88. David Hasslehoff’s Beer Farts – December 8, 2009 11:17 AM

    She has the body of a man and the chin of Leno.

    Ah yes, the oh so clever put downs of this assnapkin again. Do you not understand how much of a fool you come across as, by just bashing for the sake of bashing? I’ve seen you post, although not as frequently since you got put in your place (i know, i know, such a thing NEVER happened!!) and its the same stupid shit… 99% of those posting think shes hot? Oh noes, David (i refuse to type out such a moronic name- you make ‘Steve O’ look like a certified genius) has to insult her so he can be different than everyone else!

    CONSENSUS: Wow, shes beautiful.

    Davids dumb ass: Shes ugly and has the chin of a …a….well i ‘ll think of something!

    Shes hot, you’re a moron, get over yourself. You dont sound anywhere close to funny or clever and …then again, you know what? Carry on. Keep reinforcing my point… good job.

    And you *wish* she had the body of a man, maybe THEN you’d be able to get that tiny cack aroused.

  41. BoBo

    I see UNDERTOE

  42. Tiffany

    Get all of Carrie’s clothes here http://outfitidentifier.com/?p=20956

  43. Don

    It’s amazing how there’s NO cameltoe at all. It’s gotta be padded or something. Or she’s wearing a chastity belt. Fascinating.

    BTW, boobs are supposed to be big enough that you can motorboat them or tittyfuck them. How anyone could think otherwise is unfathomable. Tittyfucking = AWESOME

  44. toolboy

    yo #56
    repeating something a million times is not funny, if it were Pauly Shore would still be relevant and Hollywood Squares would still be on.

  45. megan

    she’s gorgeous. i can’t get over the nasty comments that some of you guys are writing… come on. do you really think you’d actually get a girl by talking like that? or one that matters, anyway? ugh. so gross.

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  47. dude

    another dumb trollop who ruined a perfectly fine body with stupid lame tattoos..

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