The Awards for Horribly Bland Pop Music With A Slight Twang For White Trash To Get Teen Pregnant To were last night, and literally the only thing interesting that happened was Carrie Underwood‘s dress had one of those boob window things and Hayden Panettiere looked kinda hot. Also, Taylor Swift didn’t win a single award for all those songs about Jake Gyllenhaal, so hopefully she learned a valuable lesson about not singing about every time some dude dumps her. We get it, men just want to have sex with you then leave when you bring up marriage. What an entirely unprecedented sequence of events, you special little snowflake.
Photos: Getty, WENN
Ahh, so that’s how she made it work with Klitschko.
The mouth is the perfect size.
Taylor Swift sucks hard, but I sorta wanted to steal and engage sexually a life size cardboard cutout of the bitch I saw at walgreens.
cuz I’m a sucker for tall blondes that look a little bit like cats.
Well, you could go for the real thing. But the cardboard cutout is smarter, will never stalk you, and has no plans to write a nasty song about you if you don’t propose on the third date.
*gasp* Cats. Yes! THAT’S why I can’t bring the hate for Taylor Swift.
Yeah, who cares about the HBPMWASTFWTTGTPT Awards ?
Pixie power(sex)>Carrie Underwood any day
The Country and Western Establishment didn’t like it when Jerry Lee Lewis at 22 married his 13 year old cousin in the 1950s and they don’t like that Taylor Swift at 22 was chasing around an 18 year old kid that just finished his Junior Year of High School.
especially when it’s one of those Kennedys…
Yes, they draw the line at marrying any cousin under 18.
She has a nice knuckle on her purse hand.
Whoa! No matter how much makeup. Still a busted face.
Her extensions look AWFUL!