Carrie Fisher Already Admitted The Harrison Ford Affair 8 Years Ago
“Let’s have a baby, and then in 30 years he can stab you to death.”
I don’t get to do this very often, so let me have this one. In 2008, I wrote a post titled “Harrison Ford & Carrie Fisher Had Drunken Space Sex.” It was terrible. Don’t go back and read it. Anyway, it was about Carrie Fisher going on a British talk show and admitting that she had an affair with Harrison Ford on the set of Star Wars. So imagine my surprise to see the internet absolutely blow the fuck up yesterday with headline after headline about how Princess Leia just revealed she slept with Han Solo IRL in her new book.
And while I was about to make some sort of smarmy connection about how lazy journalism ushered Trump into the White House, I just remembered what I do for a living. So here are Maitland Ward’s sloppy breasts in the Slave Leia bikini that I probably should’ve just copy and pasted over whatever the hell I was talking about. It’s not important.
Were these the real reason for this post the whole time? I’ll never tell… (Yes.)