Caitlyn Jenner Peed In The Trump Tower Without Assaulting Your Children
The increasingly large swaths of America where dumbfuckness reigns supreme have convinced themselves that allowing transgenders to use public restrooms of their choice will suddenly result in an explosion of rape and child molestation even though, surprise, they’ve been peeing there this whole time, and everyone’s been fine. But the amazing part is that Donald Trump, the presumptive nominee for the Republican Party who think they’re doing the Lord’s work with this shit, is actually for letting transgenders piss wherever they want and personally invited Caitlyn Jenner to do just that in his own building. Which she did and without filming your wife change her tampon. It’s a miracle. PEOPLE reports:
“This toast, actually started, in a bathroom. Actually, bathroom issues right now in my life seem to be in the forefront,” Jenner said during her speech at the TIME 100 Gala in New York City, where she was an honoree. “Actually, on that issue I just want to say also – One little trans woman walking down the street had to go, I looked up and who did I see but the Trump Tower. Last week Donald Trump said I could use any bathroom I wanted in the Trump Tower. So of course I veered right in there – took care of myself.”
Jenner, who is praised in the Time issue by father and transgender-rights activist Wayne Maines as being a “hero,” added, “I obeyed all the rules, I promise you, I didn’t throw any feminine products down the toilet. And it actually worked out quite well. It was very good.”
And while that’s a nice story to make Caitlyn Jenner feel better about voting for a party that’d like to see a return to wholesome Christian values where she’s stoned to death, but dem tax breaks tho, a fucking real transgender hero is Mara Keisling who went down to North Carolina and walked right into the state legislative office where she not only used the women’s restroom, like a boss, but was arrested with 36 others for protesting inside the building. So when Caitlyn Jenner does something like that instead of still going by Bruce to play golf, let me know. In the meantime, enjoy the circle jerk.