Bruce Jenner Is Blossoming Nicely

“Would you put me on a box of Wheaties? *applies lipstick* I’d put me on a box of Wheaties.”

First things first, girl, where’d you go and get dat haairr? Second, it’s been a while since I’ve had a musical accompaniment to a post, so this goes out to Bruce Jenner and his (?) 1990s Cindy Crawford hair. Also, it’s way too early to start reaching around when there’s low-hanging fruit just sitting right here in front of my face. It’d practically be a sin not to eat it. Right, talking snake only I can see? Right.

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Photos: Pacific Coast News, ROLO / Xposure / AKM-GSI, Splash News

Tags: Bruce Jenner