Brooke Hogan’s new album cover

May 27th, 2009 // 93 Comments

Here’s the cover for Brooke Hogan’s new album Redemption, and good news, everybody, trannies do go to Heaven. Except it appears excessive tanning is a prerequisite. I guess God hates the pale. What’re ya gonna do?

Thanks to Elena who wants to know how much airbrushing was used to hide the penis. All of it, Elena. All of it.

superficial

  1. linda

    You know what this looks like?

    The shitty ‘ghetto’ graffiti on junk cars in LA.

  2. trucker

    You know, this would be awesome if I had this airbrushed on the side of me sleeper cab.

  3. It’s like that time I had myself painted then airbrushed with a 13″ cock………… I’m playing, it was a Polaroid.

  4. Fuzzy Tingle Times

    “Brooke, we went ahead and had a carnie design your album cover when he wasn’t doing dragon t-shirts and the sides of child molesters vans”

  5. justme

    Apart from all the airbrushing and the general cheesiness of the cover, she looks a little cross eyed. I almost feel sorry for her, almost.

  6. WTF? This has got to be a joke…

  7. Wombatish

    @25, and everyone who didn’t point this out mercilessly:

    That’s the water-mark, you fucking retard.

    I’m sure you’ve already pre-ordered the album, you’re in the right I.Q. bracket.

  8. I think Brooke Hogan is trying to get a reaction off of this cover, so that people will pay more attention to her. Sadly, these days, bad publicity is still good publicity. Personally I think she should be named Hillary, or Brittany, because she is disgracing me as well as many other Brookes in the world.

  9. Pickens

    Someone finally came along and stole the title for ‘craziest bitch alive’ from Mariah Carey

  10. This picture makes her look very old.

  11. emjay

    hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ha

  12. Why?

    She’s nothing but white trash with money…GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

  13. mikeock

    What next? Journey will make a comeback?

  14. bitingontinfoil

    Looks like the side of my brother’s van circa 1978! LMAO!

  15. Kyle

    oh look, the 80′s rock band Nelson is making a come back!! I never knew angels came in orange!?

  16. WTF?

    Because nothing says “success” like being portrayed as a bad middle-school art class cartoon on your album cover.

    (I just KNOW Creepy Daddy helped design it.)

  17. buzz_clik

    @21 – I came in here to say exactly that.

  18. Mister Bored

    She shaved her blond mustache and mutton chops?

  19. Ananana

    JESUS FUCKING CHRIST ON ICE!!!

  20. Kelsey

    Oh my. Uh…Oh my.

  21. elena

    OMGGGG! SO FUCKING UGLY! ….

  22. Huh?

    What’s with the orange skin, white hair, bulging biceps, and crossed eyes?
    This has to be a joke …

  23. Flying Oompa Loompa

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! — All the Hogans are so insane, and don’t even know it. They’re a like a trainwreck carnival –

  24. Flying Oompa Loompa

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! — All the Hogans are so insane, and don’t even know it. They’re a like a trainwreck carnival –

  25. 70′s van comments already used.

    Must be a joke. Whose midsection is that supposed to be in the painting? Unredeemable.

  26. Gando

    The cover suggests it’s Brooke Hogan.

  27. Darth

    It’s that her name is written on the front otherwise i wouldn’t know.

  28. Lana

    omg, are you fucking kidding me??

  29. no comment

    ridiculoooooooouuuuuus

    this has to be a joke.. noboby has such bad taste, i dont believe it

  30. yeah

    Uh, yeaaaahhhhh…. THAT”S AN EXACT LIKENESS of Brooke. Sure. Looks just like her. Yup.
    Now, where did I put my white tipped cane and my helper pooch?

  31. C'mon now...

    Oh, please…. those of you who didn’t immediately get it-
    surely you must now realize that
    IT’S NOT A PHOTO-
    IT’S A “PAINTING”.

    If you can call sleazy van decor- “painting”… (you sure as fuck can’t call it art -)
    That is, unless you also refer to those who airbrush on fake tans for a living as “Artists”…

    And Iggy Pop is MUCH better looking.

  32. tara

    she’s always been too fat to see her ribs. you couldnt see her ribs even if you cut her chest open.
    btw her boobs are only that big because they are fatgirl boobs

  33. is it a joke… I came across an online community for individual seeking interracial love. It is blackwhitemeet.com All singles there are seeking interracial relationships. Interracial is not a problem there, but a great merit to cherish!

  34. I know this is the superficial, but calling her a tranny is no different than calling someone else a faggot or a nigger.

    It’s an ugly painting, but you’re no better than Fred Phelps if you use the word “Tranny”.

  35. I’m going to risk giving Brooke or whoever too much credit.

    Maybe this is supposed to be a clever (and sad) statement.

    Unlike Britney or Kowassian, it’s not an photoshopped or airbrushed photograph, it’s NOTHING BUT AIRBRUSH. It’s an airbrush painting of an angel with vaguely Brooke Hoganish features, but more petite and dainty than her.
    If it didn’t say “Brooke” on it you’d probably never even associate it with Brooke Hogan.

    Well anyway, what was I talking about? It seems unusual for a pop album to make a statement about media images and lies and all that.

    More something I would expect from Alanis Morissette or someone more angsty and controversial. Like if you made a painting of Alanis for an album cover, except it wasn’t repulsive.

  36. “Maybe this is album cover is supposed to be a clever (and sad) statement on media illusions and lies. Total airbrushing is Brookes ‘Redemption’.”

    I’ll knock out a few more drafts…

  37. Anne

    I just read all of these comments….you people are so dang mean it’s unbelieveable. I’m ashamed at how rude everybody’s gotten…what if someone were to say something SO incredibly mean about you too??? Doesn’t feel so nice now does it? People suck now that’s all there is to it.

  38. alicia

    all you people need lives. go find something else to make fun of with your pathetic little lives. look in the mirror and i’m 100% sure that she is more attractive and gorgeous then all you guys. i agree with anne. people have gotten so rude…

  39. She’s gorgeous. Not in this picture, persay, but she is really pretty. For real, you guys, stop acting like three year old immature slobs.
    GO BROOKE DO WHAT U WANT TO DO!

    -Un Premier Dictateur Princesse

  40. Lucy

    woww.shes talented and pretty?
    where does anyone come off insulting her just because they dont like the way she walkss.?

    i think you people need to find a different hobby.

  41. You know thats whos thats Gooo.Bye uh really like i don`t cared about it really,Britney Spears ired like i for too you.Bye all.But you klj like i know.Bye too you.Bye all.P.s Goo like i don`t cared about it Britney.Listen to her yeah whos?Dina Marie K.

  42. You know thats whos thats Gooo.Bye uh really like i don`t cared about it really,Britney Spears ired like i for too you.Bye all.But you klj like i know.Bye too you.Bye all.P.s Goo like i don`t cared about it Britney.Listen to her yeah whos?Dina Marie K.

  43. Nate

    ROFL! LMAO! LOLZ!

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