Brooke Hogan: 21 Years of Hiding a Penis

May 6th, 2009 // 169 Comments

Brooke Hogan celebrated her 21st birthday last night at Pure Nightclub in Vegas, and you’d think Hulk would give her a night off from doing the inevitable creepy double-kiss photo. Then again, I’m not practically committing incest with a clone of my daughter, so what do I know? In the meantime, Brooke needs to fire her stylist for making her look more manly than Chuck Norris eating a steak. You can almost hear the penis-tape peeling away just looking at these pics.

Photos: WENN

  1. Darth

    This is the proof that kids need female- and male-rolemodels to have their hormones tickled.

  2. ike

    I’d still hit it. Is that bad?

  3. em

    21? For real?
    I thought she was at least 35.

    Bleach blonde hair, orange fake tan and too much makeup looks really tacky and ages her.

  4. Nero

    I don’t think it’s bad in a bedroom with dimmed lights.

  5. Me

    Ewww she looks like a man…. and so does the other one.. how can you tell??

  6. Gando

    In this unverse it’s all about balance.Dark and light,good and bad,female and male and so on.

  7. dk

    What a damn shame! Shes more of a man then her bro’ .

  8. Sport

    where did they part the doublewide?

  9. Jibbly Biggins

    Yikes – that tan is NOT helping her look good. She looks like a crinkly alligator!

  10. ugly rednecks

    why does the skin on american women look like leather shoes?

  11. Carolyn

    She’s orange.

  12. really?

    I am seriously convinced that that is not her unless she has had some work done to look different and it made her look more manly. Are we sure it isnt a joke/body double?

  13. really?

    I am seriously convinced that that is not her unless she has had some work done to look different and it made her look more manly. Are we sure it isnt a joke/body double?

  14. kingofbeer

    *double take* is that 5 oclock shadow? This is the worst pic of her yet.

  15. SrfStrng

    HOLLY COW!!! She is aging HORRIBLY! Poor girl, she looks like she is turning 40 :(

  16. mandeer

    She looks like an over -baked 50 year old with horrible hair extensions and a dress way to small for her man size body. These folks are pathetic white trash.

  17. jim ferguson

    21? No way!

  18. michelle

    she looks like a 40 year old tranny.

  19. Doodah Day

    “That’s a HUGE bitch!”

  20. Mr. Obvious

    35??? you guys are way too generous. I know 45 y/o at my gym that looks younger than that.

  21. Axel

    I wasnt looking at Brooke…

  22. ryan

    Its a man baby!

  23. Hannah

    I CAN NOT BELIEVE how OLD she looks!!!!! White hair, orange skin, horrible makeup, huge fake implants, fake nails, cheap looking clothes, ugh! Some body needs to step in.

  24. Valerie

    Damn, dude, Herve Leger’s dresses are EVERYWHERE lately!

  25. m

    What the fuck happened to this chick’s face?? Did she have some nip tuck shit done to make her look more like her mother or what?? It doesn’t even look like her…

  26. Huckleberry Hashimoto

    Eeeeeuuuwwww. Just Eeeeeuuuwwww. She’s Daddy’s little girl, all right.

  27. azalea

    Ugh, some of those views make Joan Rivers look good. And I wonder how Nick feels, knowing that his sister has a bigger cock than his. Bet on it, he knows this all too well.

  28. hahaha

    OMFG, that looks like my ex with a wig and makeup. He lied, he never told me he was really Brooke Hogan. No wonder we never even made it to 1st base.

  29. Jessica

    I just can’t get over how OLD she looks… damn. Early 40s at least!

  30. She looks exactly like the SAW puppet in the main picture

  31. steve

    I guess I’m not the only one that thinks Brooke has a manly face. If she is 21 and keeps tanning, her face will look like and old boot by the time she reaches 40.

    When the lights are low at the Hogan household, can Hulk tell them apart?

  32. polo

    yeah she looks like a dude but look at her dad who can blame her…I would be more surprised if she didn’t look like a man

  33. No way

    There is NO WAY she’s 21… or female.

  34. Bo

    loi really thought she was nearing 35-40.


    Her five minutes were up four years ago, NOW WE KNOW FOSHOW !

  36. sarah


  37. …………………..THIRTY NINE YEARS!!!
    (how he did it, folks?)

  38. jenny

    #6 You are right on Its THe GUY FROM SAW

  39. geneva

    Brooke, Fire everyone who put you together and everyone who let you out of the house that night! Too much. WAY too much. Tan, boobs,hair. All wrong. Unless you were working later in your white stripper heels to make money . (Your Dad’s gonna need it.) Your Moms boy toys don’t come cheap! Good luck with your career. I’m sure I’ll see you in Playboy soon, If not, Hustler is always looking for whores.

  40. Fuck U

    That bitch aint no fuckin 21! That bitch don’t look a day over 40…what the fuck!
    Dam ugly white bitches don’t age well at all…don’t get mad…I’m just saying…
    Fuck you all!!!

  41. Such a plain Jane face, Not special

  42. Courtyardpigeon

    He is the oldest look 21 year old I have ever seen. I think what he needs is more makeup. Wait. Is that possible?

  43. Courtyardpigeon

    See how old his faggot wigger brother looks. That idiot is like 19 and looks 45. Nice job shooting up all those years Hulk. That faggot son tries WAY too hard.

  44. Horney H johnson

    Man this guy really had some good surgery done, it’s even difficult to see his adam’s apple!!

  45. 2cool4school

    She looks wayyyyy older! That fake tan makes her look ugly.

  46. BrandiLye

    Dang, Brooke! If she lost the tan and the bleach, she probably wouldn’t look so…contrived. That California Barbie thing is not feelin her at all. Her feautures, in and of themselves, aren’t that bad.

  47. just a girl..

    She looks like a 40 year old African American tranny… oops my bad Ru Paul is actually much younger looking and way better looking… much more feminine than this poor girl (I use the term loosely)

    I’m not one to pick on ugly people but when you display yourself like this, your asking for it…. Can’t she see in the mirror or has the tanning beds/ sprayer blinded her as well as turned her an unatural shade of orange…

    Mr. Hogan you are the only pedifile I know of that actually advertises it in public. You are disgusting.

    #30 &31 – I feel sorry for you… seriously… sorry…

  48. Katherine

    Wow, is she 21 going on 40? Good Lord! Coppertone should use these pics to promote their anti-sun damage products…these images are easily the “before.”

  49. WOW, When did she turn into a Dude?? I remember her looking a lot better than that. Someone must of shot her photo with the tranny lens.

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  50. wet newspaper

    21? she looks more like 43. needs to ease up on the fake tan.

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