UPDATE: Britney Spears wasn’t on drugs, just crazy

January 4th, 2008 // 89 Comments

Britney Spears’ blood test allegedly came back negative for substance abuse which police initially believed was the cause of Britney’s behavior. Life & Style reports:

“Her blood test just came back, and, thank God, it was clean. There are no traces of drugs or alcohol of any kind,” a source close to the Spears family tells Life & Style.

This information jives with a comment TMZ made earlier today:

We’ve been reporting for several months now that Britney doesn’t have a drug or alcohol problem — that her instability is mental, not chemical. Well placed sources tell us what happened last night is not rooted in drugs, and that of late, her mental state has deteriorated to the point that what happened at her home was not unexpected.

So, to the family member that said “Thank God, it was clean.” You’re right. Thank God Britney Spears only held her kid hostage because she’s batshit insane and not because of drugs. Phew, what a relief. I mean, if it were drugs, then this whole thing might be a real disaster or something. Now it’s just another anecdote the Spears’ clan will laugh about over Easter: “Hey, remember when Britney had a standoff with the police? Ha ha! God, she’s a stitch!”

UPDATE: Michael Sands, a representative for Kevin Federline’s lawyer Mark Vincent Kaplan, just informed the media that Mark Kaplan feels it would be inappropriate to do any press today. Michael Sands said he couldn’t comment on anything at this time. He also refused to confirm if the children are okay.

Photo: Splash News

  1. GO BRIT GO! ROCK IT YOU PSYCHO SKANKTARD! We’re all right behind you! http://youtube.com/watch?v=vu1C-gtugK4
    Why isn’t Christina Milian in the “So Freaking Hot” section? Two Nicollettes? BAH!

  2. Insanity is not a pretty thing.

  3. pcc

    Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual’s sense of self-identity. Originally thought to be at the “borderline” of psychosis, people with BPD suffer from a disorder of emotion regulation. While less well known than schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), BPD is more common, affecting 2 percent of adults, mostly young women.1 There is a high rate of self-injury without suicide intent, as well as a significant rate of suicide attempts and completed suicide in severe cases.2,3 Patients often need extensive mental health services, and account for 20 percent of psychiatric hospitalizations.4 Yet, with help, many improve over time and are eventually able to lead productive lives.

  4. She’s got a borderline personality.

  5. weezle

    3 – You are a prob a shining example of this. Crazy isn’t the same as stupid.

  6. Gargamel

    Brit’s crazy? So what else is new?

  7. pointandlaugh

    I predict she’ll be dead within 6 months.

  8. @8 She’s BATSHIT CRAZY.

    I wonder if her life is working out differently than what she had hoped for as a little girl?

  9. Hemlock Queen

    Hmm, I really did think it was drugs. But looking back on all of her bad outfit choices through the years… It was only a matter of time before the crazy train picked her up.

    Countdown to Suicide Watch!

  10. shallow val

    Re-test please. That’s what they said about A.N. Smith’s son, didn’t they? Or am I mistaken (I could be.)

    Now there are some mental condishes that become ripe in the mid twenties, I won’t deny that but I have a theory. Remember in the movie “Girl Interrupted” when Whoopie Goldberg had Winona Ryder in the tub screaming and Whoopi said “You’re just some girl who’se driving herself crazy.” I totally believe that you can “drive” yourself crazy and not be “for real” or “organically” crazy.

    I feel that Brit’s “breakdown,” although real-ish, truly is the result of a huge ego gone mad.

  11. or @10 I guess…

  12. nukehollywood

    It’s only a matter of time before we hear about Britney shooting up a mall in some largely rural area.

  13. Thomas

    Actually, what pushed her over the edge was when Jayden drank the last swig of her Venti Mocha-Carmel Latte. That little fucker wasn’t going anywhere until he paid for a new one or he told her how “the magical berries funnel towels to Tokyo, forcefully.*”

    (* Did I mention BATSHIT INSANE?!?!)

  14. wiinja

    my vote is for community service for her. in Iraq.

  15. jrz

    Well, as Chris Rock put it……Whatever happened to plain old crazy?

  16. D. Richards (Hands.)

    Fuck, man! I was wrong as well. I thought for certain that Britney was so fucked-up because of drugs (methamphetamines). I was thinking that she’s mentally unstable as well, but that drugs were serving to accelerate her instability.

    Damn. I was wrong for once. Never again. One time out of life: not bad!

    I guess, though, that, in the pantheon-of reckless behavior, schizophrenia trumps drug abuse nine-times out of ten. I’m so happy that I have Britney in my life.

  17. jrz

    And hey…better a borderline personality than no personality at all!! HAHA…HA….ha….ho………………….*sighs* Is this thing on?

  18. PunkA

    It won’t be long before Britney not only loses equal custody of her kids, but loses control of her own money. My guess is that a fight will start soon to get a court appointed representative in place to control her fortune, so she doesn’t blow it on frivolous things. She will probably get an allowance, which will be huge, but not allow her to totally waste what she earned. And let’s hope so. I don;t want the bitch to be supported by the state when she can do it herself now, unless she blows it.

  19. LadyJane

    Crazy moms make for super-fun birthday parties and shit.

  20. The Beer Baron

    All she needs now is about 12 cats to complete the look!

  21. jrz

    And you got that right….you should see the creative balloon creatures crazy mom’s make at berfday parties and the new and interesting pinata fillings…

  22. Methinks she could be drinking too much caffeine. From the Wiki on caffeine.

    “The symptoms of caffeine intoxication are not unlike overdoses of other stimulants. It may include restlessness, nervousness, excitement, insomnia, flushing of the face, increased urination, gastrointestinal disturbance, muscle twitching, a rambling flow of thought and speech, irritability, irregular or rapid heart beat, and psychomotor agitation. In cases of much larger overdoses mania, depression, lapses in judgment, disorientation, loss of social inhibition, delusions, hallucinations, psychosis, rhabdomyolysis, and death may occur.”

    Note “rambling flow of thought” “irritability” “mania” “depression” “lapses in judgment” “loss of social inhibition”

  23. makemepuke

    I believe her condition is called “spoiled immature attention seeking baby” characterized by malignant narcissim (which is actually quite epidemic in hollywood) and a tendency to have tantrums and displays of petulance when she doesn’t get her way. It is also characterized by an inflated sense of entitlement and a total disregard for the needs of anyone but herself. I beleive the condition is caused when you start with a person with below average intelligence and stunted emotional maturity and add in excessive adoration and media attention combined with too much money and an underlying lack of true talent. The talentlessness eventaully becomes apparent and the person resorts to all kinds antics to stay the focus of attention.

  24. LL

    Damn, someone made a Girl, Interrupted comment before me. I was gonna say something like, “Let’s get some Angelina Jolie, stat!”

    Is there a psychological term for stupid? Like “clinically stupid”? Because I think that’s what Britney is. With terminal attention whoreness.

    Obviously, having never met the dummy, I can’t render a professional opinion, but I think that’s what it is. She’s an attention whore. That’s why she’s smiling in the back of an ambulance. If she was really crazy, she’d be freaking out, but she’s sitting there smiling like she’s at the mall or something. I don’t think she has a mental illness, I think she’s just an idiot who wants to be the center of attention like she always has been. If you want to call that crazy, fine, but I think it just makes her immature. She’s a 20-something woman who wants to be 16 again. Which makes her not unlike a lot of other attention whores in America who want people to pay attention to them just because.

  25. PunkA

    My ex was bi polar, obsessive compulsive and borderline personality. That crap(borderline) does not usually happen unless sexual abuse is involved, so if she has it, would have to at least make you wonder if she got messed with when younger by some sick freak.

    But who knows, maybe she is just bi-polar, needs some lithium, and she will be a crazy chick without the edge.

    Between Paris getting her inheritance taken away, LiLo showing her true colors as a sexual addict, and Britney showing whacked in the head she is, is has been a great week. Mischa Barton was just a bonus. Lucky bitch got busted in the best week possible now as she is not even on the main pages.

  26. PunkA

    It won’t be long before Britney not only loses equal custody of her kids, but loses control of her own money. My guess is that a fight will start soon to get a court appointed representative in place to control her fortune, so she doesn’t blow it on frivolous things. She will probably get an allowance, which will be huge, but not allow her to totally waste what she earned. And let’s hope so. I don;t want the bitch to be supported by the state when she can do it herself now, unless she blows it.

  27. Jayden’s friends are gonna get really uncomfortable when she drunkenly offers to teach each of them to play pocket pool…

  28. nipolian

    #7 She doesn’t have BPD, what she has is CTSR aka Crazier Than a Shithouse Rat.

  29. Miss American Dream

    @27 Word.

  30. bee bop bobby badooba dooba booba

    HA HA # 19– I told ya that bitch was crazy!

  31. veggi

    LMAO!!! This is the funniest running story, ever! I hope the next part is revealing that she shaved the retard kids’ hair.

  32. #19 – I wouldn’t hit her… but I’ll shake the shit out of a bitch…

  33. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    27′s comment was by far the best Britney Spears theory I’ve heard.

  34. BaldAsBritney

    And the spin goes on. toxicology reports usually take up to a week to be processed so this is just bullshit. She was on OXY, bet on it, and god knows what else. I wish her publicists luck trying to convinvce everyone she’s clean.

  35. Is she wearing a black babydoll nightie?

  36. ipanema_girl_turned_schuyler

    My guess is, she went over the top when she saw those pics of Kevin and Paris together, having a great blast over New Year. This and her pregnant sister .. she just HAD to do something so that she gets back on the main pages.

    I wonder why no one mentions where Lynn is.

    I always have the feeling that all of this shit is just a big PR stunt over the years and who knows. Maybe Lynne told Brit it’s now her turn to be in the headlines again and this crap is just a plot.

    That’s why I also still don’t believe that jamie lynn really is pregnant. I’ll believe it when she pops out a kid.

  37. From out of nowhere

    KFED says “Ha ha hahahahahaha, this is all part of master plan to get her money”

    Step 1: Pretend to dance
    Step 2: Get hired by singer as a back up dancer
    Step 3: Only have sex with singer in the dark, (swaps places with hung black dude, and sends her into heaven)
    Step 4: Oh she hooked now, Talk her into buying a ring and paying you to marry her.
    Step 5: Pre-nup, ha, just a small bump.
    Step 6: Have sex with her this time yourself and get her pregnant, Damn she noticing something wrong, twice she damn you were a lot bigger before. Play it off as post wedding gitters. Her mental stability slipping.
    Step 7: Wahoo, she pregnant , got a reprieve for 9 months.
    Step 8: baby comes
    Step 9: repeat steps 6 – 8.
    Step 10: Damn she on to me,
    Step 11: Tossed out on my ass, but she headed to ape shit since that dude can’t be found to send her to heaven
    Step 12: WAHOO, finally flew over the coo coo nest. Call lawyer, start preceding to seize control of estate and money.
    Step 13: Send the brats off to Louisiana Hillbilly Trailer Park academy.
    Step 14: Buy a tricked out trailer and some gold linen duct tape, and beer and live happily ever after.

  38. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    #38…I think that her publicists include that Sam guy, Alli, and x17online. I am not sure when Life & Style magazine reporting became credible, but they are the only ones quoting “sources” that Britney was not on drugs. It takes weeks to get tests back like that. It took that long with Anna Nicole, and I am sure, even if she is amidst a custody battle, it will take that long for Britney. I bet the public is in for another 500 theories explaining why she did what she did.

  39. BaldAsBritney

    #42 right you are. Remember Chris Benoit? It took 2 weeks to get his toxicology results back and that was a muder invsetigation ! How fucking stupid do Brits poeple think we are?

  40. Celebutard Hater

    Never mind me… I’m just chillin’ a bottle of Dom… making some hors d’oeuvre… sitting in front of my laptop..

    Just waiting for that long overdue, magical, special moment when she will be left alone in a room with sharp objects, or a bottle of bleach, or some rope…

  41. JackBlack

    Like I said before, the has-been washed-up skank needs to go to jail. Lockdown at a funny farm is a good first step before she goes completely ape-shit and kills her sons.

  42. This girl is crazy AND on drugs.

    “Her blood test just came back, and, thank God, it was clean.”
    Yeah fuckin right…

  43. TJ

    Did someone say obsessive compulsive disorder is caused by sexual abuse? I love people that just make stuff up off the top of their heads.

    I think it’s sad, sad, sad… but this is “the superficial” so let’s just say she’s depressed that she’s a joke.

  44. Karissa

    Some of you people on here make me sick! Someone has had a horrible breakdown and you make fun of it like it’s a joke.

    Yeah ok, Britney hasn’t exactly been mom of the year, but to be on lockdown in a MENTAL hospital means this situation is serious and potentially LIFE THREATENING. ( Oh yeah, I forgot. Some of you asshats will find that amusing too.. )

  45. asshat

    #48 Karissa – Funniest comment so far today!

  46. shallow val

    48 – Shut up.

    (ANOTHER one with a kutesy name like Karissa; it’s amazing, the correllation between cutesy named bloggers and their goodie-two-shoed comments)

  47. Blue Max

    #48 Karissa……..fuck off.

  48. Blue Max

    #27 Are you Make Me Puke, MD?

    Because your diagnosis is the ONLY one that fits….and I believe the ICD-9 code for that dx is 666.66.

  49. jor-el

    People, people, people. It’s the Disney curse. Jeeze. Can’t you see that she was probably molested by one of her Disney managers / handlers and now she’s all messed up about it.

    All the Disney women are messed up, to some degree.

Leave A Comment