Britney Spears’ video details are elevatory

July 10th, 2008 // 27 Comments

Britney Spears filmed her video short for Madonna’s Sticky & Sweet tour and it”ll reportedly be shown at the opening of each show. Nothing like giving ticketgoers a chance to flee in terror before you even perform. Very crafty, Madonna. E! News posted the following description of the video:

According to our insiders, the planned “short movie” will take place inside an elevator, where seven cameras will be strategically placed to capture the magic. The scene-by-scene breakdown goes like this:
Britney, partially disguised by a gray hoodie, walks into the elevator. As she starts traveling upward, she seems particularly nervous and anxious. The popster starts pacing back and forth. Then she progresses to kicking and smacking the walls, all frantic-like. She screams into one of the cameras. Then she starts climbing the wall, pulls down her hood and, into another camera, says: “It’s Britney, bitch.”

Riiiight. Because that sounds completely scripted. So basically they’re just following Britney Spears around with a camera. I’m sure the video will have other segments including Britney doing “her thing, y’all”:

Sleeping standing up. Though no one notices even with the snoring.
Challenging the crew to a pie eating contest but failing to mention the pies are made of tacos, Cinnabon and humpback whale. (She wins.)
Trying to open her car door with a handgun.
Trying to open a can of soda with a handgun.
Trying to load her now empty handgun – with a handgun.

superficial

  1. DSY

    FIIRRRRRST!

  2. caravanboi

    somebody go up early

  3. Why on earth would anyone want a “Britney video” to start out their own concert. Unless it was a video of Britney choking to death on her own vomit?

    Oh, #1 – yep, you are a douche.

  4. Is it cartoon Britney, like that Aeon Fux looking chick in the last video? That’s the only way it makes sense to me.

  5. James

    The video sounds awful. Even if it were someone other than Britney – why would anyone want to watch that? How does it make any sense as a lead-in to a Madonna concert?

  6. A-Rod

    Hey Britney, stay away from my woman, bitch..!!!

  7. havoc

    She also says that to her kids when they call her Mommy.

    “Its Britney, bitch”.

    .

  8. Clem

    Eee-Or!!! Eee-Or!!! Eee-Or!!!!

  9. Grunion

    Wow, she has gone from selling out her own concerts to making stupid short films mocking her mental state to be played at someone eleses sold out shows.

    Oh yeah, the comeback is ON

    Randal, comments?

  10. FCS

    I’m sure this will be one of the many exciting and ultra-original ideas Madonna is set to unleash on her tour. Boy, I wonder if she will say or do something contraversial about religion, or pretend to have sex on stage with somebody.

    Cause we’ve never seen that before that’s for sure.

  11. Sounds like a horror flick..

  12. britney's weave

    i don’t get it.

  13. Spongebob Gangsta

    Correction #12

    It’s a Whoreror flick.

  14. That description sounds like it has to be a joke.

  15. Ray

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  16. idk, my bff Jill

    @ #16: “I’m Ron Burgundy?”

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  17. Will she show up, will she be sober, will the weave last until filming stops… nobody knows *chuckles*

  18. I’m still damn curious: WHERE DID SHE GET THAT SUPER-FAKED SMILE?

  19. Arctic

    I love how you can actually see stupidity drip off her when she laughs. “omg it spins harr harr”

  20. BM

    i love her sunglasses

  21. EuroNeckPain

    Does she have a metal toothcap in the back of her mouth ? Will all the millions she’s got, she could afford porcelain. With this typical american overdone expression, the metal shows ! Rubber face. Too many [nasal sound] woaaw, geee, oh my gooood !

  22. Jbo

    Why does she always have to have her fat hog mouth gapping open? Too bad she dropped out of school – she could have used some edumacation on how to act like a proper human – instead of a animal who needs handlers… No matter how much money this whore has, i wouldn’t trade places with her for ANYTHING! Of course, if I were her, none of this carazy business would have happened….

  23. @22
    That’s actually a silver bullet from when we tried to eliminate her. We thought that silver bullets would kill anything that transformed into an insane beast, but as it turns out, those only work on werewolves… (and vampires if you hit them in the heart)

  24. Kathleen

    Supposedly they are going to “shock” again according to the Sun. Like oh my gosh!

  25. Kareem Ofwheat

    It’s just me little Britney in my little gray hoodie freakin out in my little elevator.

  26. Capers

    Madonna just needs to go ahead and have her final operation to add a dick to her man body……..and Britney just needs to towel off her washed up self and look for work at Denny’s…..

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