Britney Spears to light tree at Rockefeller Center
Live in New York City? Now would be a good time to leave. Britney Spears is scheduled to light the tree at Rockefeller Center therefore ushering in Armageddon and ruining Christmas for every girl and every boy, according to OK! Magazine:
Sources close to the pop superstar confirm to OK! that on Dec. 3, the day after she turns 27 and her new album, Circus, hits record stores, Britney will be in the Big Apple for the 76th annual tree-lighting extravaganza. What’s still unclear is whether or not she’ll be performing at the ceremony, or just hanging out with host Al Roker for the NBC broadcast of the event.
BABY JESUS: Britney Spears? Are you shitting me?! She’ll eat the tree! Dad.
GOD: Son, the game’s on.
BABY JESUS: But, dad, she’ll ruin my birthday.
GOD: Jesus, Jesus, you’re killin’ me.
BABY JESUS: Fine. But I’m giving Stephen Baldwin those laser eyes he keeps asking for.
GOD: Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. TOUCHDOWN!
UPDATE: Stephen Baldwin blew up Hollywood, Keith Olbermann and beloved Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling today…