Britney Spears is going on the offensive and wants her children tested for secondhand marijuana smoke. She’s convinced Kevin Federline smokes pot around the kids because she can smell it on their hair and clothes during her visitations, according to Life & Style magazine:
“She’s asked the court-appointed monitor and her lawyers if they can prove the kids have been exposed to environments in which drugs have been taken,” an insider says. They told her she should snip off a few strands of their hair right after they’ve returned from Kevin’s place and have them analyzed in a lab.
Here’s the major hole in this story: Britney smells pot on the kids’ clothes. This would suggest Britney interacts with her children like a normal mother and doesn’t shove them in plastic bubbles then kick them around her house. Which, let’s be real, is undeniably the case. However, should it turn out that Kevin does light up around the boys, it won’t change anything. Not even if Britney has photos of Sean and Jayden harvesting weed in their toy box. The judge would just comment on how precious they are then request for someone to get Anne Geddes and her stupid babies on the phone. They just got owned.
mkell | December 20, 2007 at 10:46 am
He has the perfect defense: “I know YOU are, but what am I?” Her legal team would collapse.
Gerald_Tarrant | December 20, 2007 at 10:46 am
Headline: Britney Spears will say anything to steal attention from Jamie Lynn.
D4P | December 20, 2007 at 10:48 am
How does Britney know what pot smells like…?
Ascil | December 20, 2007 at 10:49 am
Damn you Kevin, n Britney is going dooooown the rooooooad
Ascil | December 20, 2007 at 10:49 am
Damn you Kevin, n Britney is going dooooown the rooooooad
kedhater | December 20, 2007 at 10:50 am
She is really stunning.. I am expecting her new music video. She looks so hot in that pictures. BTW, have u guys seen her on a millionaire site MEETRICH.COM? I heard of this around some famous gossip sites.
Mo | December 20, 2007 at 10:52 am
#3 –
I don’t smoke pot, but I know what it smells like. That said, she doesn’t have a whole lot of legal room to work with when she won’t even show up to court.
ffgfdfg | December 20, 2007 at 10:53 am
hahaha no shit
(I live inside Amy Winehouse's head) | December 20, 2007 at 10:53 am
So…if the Brit-tots did test positive for secondhand marijuana smoke (what a dumb bitch) how will she prove it’s K-fed’s and not hers?????????????
Now she’s going to see to it that they both lose the kids….but first, because the Shitney is so dumb, I nominate K-fed for FATHER OF THE FUCKING YEAR!!!!!!
David J. | December 20, 2007 at 10:55 am
Couldn’t that prove just as easily Britney was smoking and the kids got the residue from visiting her? I can just see her lighting up and blowing smoke on the poor creatures.
IWONKY | December 20, 2007 at 10:55 am
Nobody from this site is ever going to visit your site, #6, you fuck.
Auntie Kryst | December 20, 2007 at 10:58 am
What the hell is up with the LA court system suggesting Britney use a scissors, near her kids’ heads no less?
redsonja1313 | December 20, 2007 at 11:02 am
WTF …………………….. IS UP WITH THAT OUTFIT !!!!!!!!!!!!! Jesus this is an all time low…. How the fuck do you screw up jeans and t-shirt. I think someone should put a bounty out on those smelly ugly boots.
Lamuella | December 20, 2007 at 11:03 am
He smokes pot around the kids?
bitch, you snort coke OFF your children.
Ript1&0 | December 20, 2007 at 11:04 am
Wait. You can’t smoke pot and have kids anymore??
Damn man, that 6 footer isn’t going to light itself. And Junior’s grown to exactly bowl height now!!
Gerald_Tarrant | December 20, 2007 at 11:09 am
@12 – Once Jamie Lynn pops you have to retire that name because BritBrit will officially be the Auntie Kryst.
LindaP | December 20, 2007 at 11:11 am
Wow Brit, that’s terrible. So anyway, how is your sister? Have you talked to her today? Does she have morning sickness? Is it true that she is no longer in a relationship with the father?
Brit, why are you in a fetal position on the ground saying “Loooooooove me” over and over?
p0nk | December 20, 2007 at 11:13 am
but i bet he doesn’t steal their clothes and wear them in public.
Conscience Found | December 20, 2007 at 11:15 am
***===~~~ ***===~~~ ***===~~~ ***===~~~
GOSSIP IS EVIL.
YOU ARE DOING EVIL.
INSTEAD OF MAKING FUN OF OTHERS’ PROBLEMS,
WORRY ABOUT YOUR OWN ‘PERFECT’ LIFE.
YOU ARE JUST AS BAD – JUST WITHOUT THE MONEY AND FAME.
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAA
***===~~~ ***===~~~ ***===~~~ ***===~~~
IWONKY | December 20, 2007 at 11:16 am
K-fed expose the kids to pot smoke but Brit exposes the world to her twat smell. Trust me, even skunk weed smells way better.
Racer X | December 20, 2007 at 11:17 am
Second hand Marijuana smoke?
/riiight
Superevil | December 20, 2007 at 11:17 am
19 you’re the second biggest douche here next to the spambot.
chiharu | December 20, 2007 at 11:19 am
spears family is so pathetic. not to forget the gross federline’s too.
LadyJane | December 20, 2007 at 11:19 am
Pffft. My 6 year old can roll the BEST fatties.
frogexaggerator | December 20, 2007 at 11:20 am
Remember: sometimes the best defense is a good offense. As a lawyer, I’m thinking she knows EXACTLY where they got that pot smell, and has figured out that it’s probably only a matter of time before kfed had the kids drug tested anyway. So this way, she’s grabbing the initial advantage. It’s actually not a terrible strategy, though of course I’m sure it wasn’t Britney’s idea to do it. I just think her lawyers discovered her pot use and realized they had to spin it first.
Gerald_Tarrant | December 20, 2007 at 11:24 am
I’m sure that K_fed smoking out is no surprise to anyone, even the judge. He made Popozao for fucks sake. You’d have to be stoned to make that shit.
Auntie Kryst | December 20, 2007 at 11:32 am
@16 Damn G T you’re right, I didn’t think about that. Also I guess the lie is Jamie is farther along than she told the press. I’ll start coming up with some new names. Thanks for the head’s up.
Dee | December 20, 2007 at 11:43 am
Just when you think she can’t get any lower she’s gotta use the kids…if it was the other way around, she would have already shaved their heads.
ThePope | December 20, 2007 at 11:52 am
Fedreline smokes dope in front of the kids. Britney has sex with strangers while coked up in front of them. Which is worse? Hell I don’t know. Let’s get Kevin, Britney and the Roman Catholic Pope (yes from Rome) all on Larry King Live to talk about it . Maybe Britney will finally flash her beaver on national TV and make it ok for that kind of thing to happen on shows like Heroes (are you reading this Hayden?) Just a thought.
shanipie | December 20, 2007 at 11:58 am
LoL I’m sorry but Pot is a lot better to be around than lines of coke and dildos Britney, Geez!
MindRiot | December 20, 2007 at 12:08 pm
Wow nice save Brit. Way to fire back hard. That’s why they call it expert legal council.
Matthew | December 20, 2007 at 12:08 pm
hey brit congrads your the new winner of the biggest douch of the universe from john edwards way to go douche
I live inside Amy Winehouse's Head | December 20, 2007 at 12:12 pm
K-fed IS gross, but I have yet to see him in out in public sans underwear or driving around like a fucking asshat to get to Starschmucks.
Shitney | December 20, 2007 at 12:19 pm
She is going to blow pot smoke and those poor kids while they sleep to make sure she wins this. Deport her back to the poor trailer park she crawled out from
veggi | December 20, 2007 at 12:27 pm
I’ll smoke it with ya brit, we’ll go to the loony bin together. I don’t give a fuck!..
sam sneed | December 20, 2007 at 12:39 pm
http://acast.myminicity.com/
RichPort | December 20, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Wait… since when has it been illegal to smoke pot in front of kids? Did the laws change?
.... | December 20, 2007 at 1:17 pm
what a mess this whole family is.
veggi | December 20, 2007 at 2:26 pm
37- RichPort… I KNOW, right? But I always prefered it in brownie form as a child..
El-Coyote | December 20, 2007 at 2:31 pm
LOL – I SOOO hope she does this. A childs hair would prove one thing only.
The child had been around pot smoke. The only way to prove which parent was the culprit is for both to submit hair samples. How do you think she would do with that? Even if he IS dumb enough to smoke weed still she has to have at least 3 drugs in her system these days.
Do it Brit! End the custody battle once and for all…
steve dawkins | December 20, 2007 at 2:33 pm
HERE IS VIDEO OF IT:
http://acast.myminicity.com/tra
STD | December 20, 2007 at 2:43 pm
#41
Hi Steve, That is the video of me taking a dump in your mom’s mouth! She liked it a lot.
nick | December 20, 2007 at 2:45 pm
@35, play my head monkey
Go Away Loser | December 20, 2007 at 2:57 pm
@ 19………………………..Why thank you …………..I do have a perfect life with money and a beautiful home and man. There are multiple motorcycles (mine) in the drive way and 3+ cars. My ass is smaller then Brit’s and my abs look like hers did before kids, I live adjacent to Conseco and K-Fed…. and OH WAIT I DID NOT HAVE TO WHORE OUT ANYTHING to obtain it, I worked hard and earned it. Hmmmm and I got to Starbucks, nobu and pretty much anywhere on sunset unencumbered by anything other then the friends I have had for 20+ years. But I do so appreciate your sentimental and caring thoughts and ……….. YES I AM QUIETLY JUDGING YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tc | December 20, 2007 at 3:07 pm
She looks quite hot in this pic.
(Except for the crack-whore scabs around her mouth)
WHERE DA FUCK MY KFC AT?!1 LAWLZ | December 20, 2007 at 3:08 pm
And I say that Britney wears no panties while out shopping with her children. And that’s a goddamn felony.
Besides… at least when Kevin’s lighting up around the children he’s putting them in a happier place that doesn’t consist of their mom’s saggy tits and cone head. Let’s rejoice.
latty | December 20, 2007 at 4:25 pm
He could be passing them the pipe for all I care – it’s less toxic than what Bitchney has been subjecting them to.
Hell, with her for a Momma, they probably NEED a toke or two.
AreYouSingle | December 20, 2007 at 4:33 pm
excuse me #44 do you need a boy toy?
fizz | December 20, 2007 at 5:37 pm
i love those guitar panties sticking out of her jeans, so hot!
Chuck | December 20, 2007 at 6:24 pm
You would think if they did smell like pot, Shitney would want to see them more. Maybe the kids are desperately trying to get there anti-mom to pay more attention to them. I don’t know, did they already try dressing up like a latte?