Britney Spears receiving ‘guidance’ from Mel Gibson

Apparently, it’s Spiritual Awareness Day on The Superficial. People is reporting that Britney Spears is now under the divine tutelage of Mel Gibson. Christ! It appears the two met for over two hours last night at a Beverly Hills cigar club:

For more than two-and-a-half hours, the singer, 26, and the actor-filmmaker, 52, met in what was confirmed to PEOPLE as a more of an ongoing guidance session than a business pow-wow.
“Britney looked like a doll with bright red lipstick,” added the photog, who described her as “very quiet” and “with a serious look on her face as she walked in to the Havana Club.”
By contrast, an upbeat Gibson left his silver Lexus with the valet and walked in holding what was described as a “man-purse” up to his face and a look of “okay, you got me” as paparazzi snapped his picture.

This should end well. And by well I mean Britney drunkenly crashing her Mercedes into a synagogue after receiving promises of Taco Bell. Oh, Mel Gibson, how black is your heart? Now she’ll really never work in music again.*

*Check’s in the mail, sugartits. Signed, The Entire Human Race.