Britney Spears puts K-Fed on a budget

March 13th, 2006 // 88 Comments

*britney_spears_budget.jpgInsiders say that Britney Spears has put her husband Kevin Federline on a budget. “Each month, he will be allotted a certain amount of money for personal use – i.e., clothing, nightclubs, booze and day-to-day activities. Any big items – cars, or trips that go over allowance – need to be approved by Brit herself,” said one source. “She acknowledges she has made a great deal of money. However, she is trying to show Kevin that he needs to be responsible and curb his out-of-control spending habits.”

Wow, he has to ask his wife for clothes and booze – and he’s not even irish. I don’t know where “begging wife for money” ranks on the list of life achievements. Probably somewhere between “becoming world’s dirtiest circus groupie” and “writing homo-erotic Andy Griffith fanfic.” Maybe lower.

Source

superficial

  1. A Nobody

    Mommy dearest.

  2. Becca

    I wonder if she’ll end up like Micheal Jackson minus the child molesting? I mean I think by now it’s pretty safe to say her career is over all thanks to that douchebag. So then that’s where the MJ related question comes in, will she now start to rack up some debt?

  3. Grphdesi23

    Haha….K-Fed is on a leash….oh sorry, I mean, budget.

    What a loser.

  4. amma

    Does she give him extra money for strippers and stuff?
    This is a case of non-surgical castration. Not that he doesn’t deserve it.
    Why doesn’t she dump him and settle down with a nice trucker or something? She’d be better off.

  5. zeolitea

    I think Becca is right, her career is long over and she should be starting to accept that and get rid of that moron

  6. LinguisticAnthro

    Here’s an idea – make him get a job and spend his OWN money on worthless crap. These two deserve each other.

  7. mamacita

    He he he, Kevin gets an allowance. I wonder if she makes him do chores for it.

    Britney:

    “Kevin, you better get the baby wipes and clean this cheeto dust off my fingers, or you’re not getting your allowance!”

    Kevin:

    “Damn, baby, why you gotta be like that? You crampin a brotha’s style, yo.”

  8. I think that is fair…I mean it is her money and she made it so I don’t think her dead beat hubbie should be able to put her in the poor house. I’m sure his monthly ‘alotment’ is more than many of us make so I’m sure there are no complaints.

  9. What about the money he got for selling their wedding shots and the money he split with her for that reality show. Is that gone already?!!? The idiot got a few million for that. He could have bought real-estate, or at miniumum put it in a failry safe mutual fund and had a never ending supply of interst. I know, I get it, the guy is a douchebag, but I don’t think it every really settles into my brain about just what a HUGE douchebag he is.

  10. Go Sip

    K-Fed’s on a budget for money he must beg,
    Britney needs the extra dough for meals from Jenny Craig,
    They think she might be pregnant, K-Fed’s partying feeling great,
    He ought to have his nutz snipped so they cant pro create,
    She isnt wearing her ring, she’s chubby and feels crappy,
    She ought to wind her arm back and give K-Fed a slappy.
    She took away his money, she’s about to give him the “punt”,
    He’ll be back to drinking forty’s and smoking dirt weed blunts,
    Good for you Brit, dont give that mooch a dime,
    Even if your’e pregnant, KICK HIM OUT, ITS TIME!!

  11. LB

    I wonder how much money she actually has…
    I mean, if that giant Christman nativity scene ended up putting her (and her two dependants) in trouble financially, I’d be laughing pretty hard right now.
    (That said, she’ll likely have had more money than I ever will)

  12. BarbadoSlim

    I can’t believe what a stain on the underwear that is humanity this guy is. I’m convinced that life, as we know it, would improve on this planet if God were to end his existence, right now.

    *looks up waits and prays*

  13. Quiggie

    I think it’s about time she used her head. She should have put her foot down long ago. And # 8, Darby, you’re right. His monthly allowance is most likely more than what most of us make in a month. He bet not be complaining.

  14. I think that Britney is actually Jonbenet Ramsey…Mildly goodlooking and white-trash.

  15. ESQ

    I think she needs to put a lock on her pussy to cut-down on his procreating habits as well. She obviously isn’t that smart!

  16. ElFurbe

    Good on you, K-Fed.

    Quoth hackers:
    “Yack yack yack. Get a job.”

  17. Oops, I take that back about Jonbenet…She was murdered back in 96′ so Britney couldn’t be her. My bad.

  18. Good thing Mama Spears insisted on the pre-nup, though it’s disgusting that Kevin balked only because they wanted to give him “only” 35K in the first go-round. What a parasite.

  19. Devil Is Chrome

    The rumors are true! Britney really does has two babies!

  20. Courtney

    I propose a moratorium on all Britney & Cheetos jokes.

  21. If I knew what a “moratorium” was, I’d second that proposal. I’m not very well educated…Plus, I work for the government…

  22. B-Bomb

    is a moratorium like a morgue? where britney’s career is? (because her career is dead…get it? hee hee.)

  23. I am torn. As much as I despise the white trash that is Kevin Federline, should I? I mean, he is singlehandedly responsible for stopping the brainrot-inducing pop songs of Britney Spears. If her career is over, we should crown K-Fed King of all Wiggers and put his face in a place of honor – prominently on a bag of Cheetos. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure Britney will turn this all around – go sob on Oprah, do the Crystal Meth diet, and divorce K-Fed, King of all Wiggers. In one, final indignity, she will go on public assistance and you and I will be paying for her and her van driving toddler. But the question remains – if K-Fed, King of all Wiggers, is sparing us for one more day, one more hour, a new Britney Spears release… is he a villain… or hero? Oh, screw it – forgot about Popozao. There’s a place reserved in Hell for him.

  24. sammygirl

    Moratorium means to suspend or stop something temporarily. Like putting a moratorium on the death penalty, or putting a moratorium on Britney’s career.

    Personally, I think K-Fed is entitled to Brit’s money. He’s providing her with his sperm and in return, she provides him with her money. He may be a stupid tool in so many ways, but he’s a parasite and he knows how to latch onto a host and bleed it dry. It’s instinctual.

  25. bafongu

    Revenge of the PoPoZao!!!

  26. gogoboots

    I am sort of glad he stopped the whole brain rotting pop music of Britney Spears. However, she should really just dump him and have his baby. That would be much more empowering in a feminist sense, like how Madonna dumped the Italian sperm donor and had Lourdes.

  27. suzy

    i didn’t know she had 2 kids

  28. dodah1

    Her career IS over. It has been for sometime. She better figure out what she’s going to do with herself, because it’s TRULY over, no joke. She’s a mother, got a kid, and a husband, and just for the record, Kevin is no worse than her. They are one of the same. Seriously, no one ever cares about her anymore. Just a walking trainwreck.

  29. dodah1

    Her career IS over. It has been for sometime. She better figure out what she’s going to do with herself, because it’s TRULY over, no joke. She’s a mother, got a kid, and a husband, and just for the record, Kevin is no worse than her. They are one of the same. Seriously, no one ever cares about her anymore. Just a walking trainwreck.

  30. my_glorious_lawn

    It’s begining to seem less like a marriage and more like Briteny Spears is Kevin Federline’s long lost Mom!

  31. dodah1

    Her career IS over. It has been for sometime. She better figure out what she’s going to do with herself, because it’s TRULY over, no joke. She’s a mother, got a kid, and a husband, and just for the record, Kevin is no worse than her. They are one of the same. Seriously, no one ever cares about her anymore. Just a walking trainwreck.

  32. Her career IS over. It has been for sometime. She better figure out what she’s going to do with herself, because it’s TRULY over, no joke. She’s a mother, got a kid, and a husband, and just for the record, Kevin is no worse than her. They are one of the same. Seriously, no one ever cares about her anymore. Just a walking trainwreck.

    Just wanted to make sure everyone got this post…

  33. “All he has to do is romnace her just a little bit,

    Sip some wine and get them pants off just a little bit,

    Put some lorazepam in her wine just a little bit,

    she passes out, he takes the card and spends just a little bit”

    I know that is a very bad impression of 50′s song but you all know it will happen.

  34. Typo – romance*

  35. Evangelia

    i kinda agree with you #20. if not a complete moratorium, then at least a cautionary warning to please be very sparing with the cheeto references.
    and #33, i thought you were spoofing 50 cent’s song, “a little bit”?

  36. aura

    You mean, he wasn’t on a budget before? She really was letting him spend all of her money? Britney! Srsly. WTF is wrong with you? Kevin doesn’t need allowance from Britney to make him look like a loser… he’s already established that fact on his own, long ago.

  37. Lord Absu

    Budget or no budget, this guy’s life has got to be beyond sweet.

    I mean, this dude basically slithered out of some dank, flatulent hellhole, his only intention being to blaze through the imponderably vast sums of money made by some blonde chick who’s been busting her hump in showbusiness pretty much ALL HER LIFE.

    There is indeed a special place in Hell reserved for the likes of K-Fed, but I seriously think it might just be worth living the kind of life it takes to earn that fiery nook of Afterlife…

  38. HollyJ

    This is the first intelligent thing Britney’s ever done. GOOD FOR HER. (She’s still a pathetic redneck, but I LOVE that she put his loser ass on a short financial leash.)

  39. mamacita

    For everyone who wants a moratorium on the tired cheeto jokes:

    Britney:

    “Kevin, you better get over here and clean up this puppy pad with Bit Bit’s shit on it or you’re not getting your allowance!”

    Kevin:

    “Damn, baby, why you gotta be like that? You crampin a brotha’s style, yo.”

    Dear God. I am so ashamed that I know her dog’s name.

  40. DuckBoy

    Britney’s career isn’t over

    and I don’t think she’s in any financial trouble, she makes money everyday

    her perfume line alone made her an estimated 40 million dollars last year

  41. angelatbone

    I don’t know what that whole Andy Griffith Comment was all about? Someone wrote an article about him on The Velvet Hot Tub…he was named PIMP of the Week…hahhahaa.

    http://www.velvethottub.com

  42. DuckBoy, I’m curious, Does she get a fee for them to use her name or does she get a piece of every bottle sold, if she gets a piece damn, she scored. Who would have thought a Perfume fronted by her would do that well. Now some sort of Snack cake I could see.

  43. Swordman

    that way she will save her money to buy lunch meat and pumpkin mix

  44. Grphdesi23

    I think it’s only fair that if Britney can put K-Fed on a budget, that he be allowed to put her on a Slim Fast diet.

    Equality in marriage!

  45. happyday

    “Can you handle my true? You aint getting no mo’ money douchebag.”

    #6 He does have a career– his singing career remember? PoPoZao. Hence the allowance.
    http://www.thesuperficial.com/archives/2006/02/24/peanut_butter_federline.html

  46. sammygirl

    40 million sounds like a ton of money to you and me, but you’d be suprised how quickly these celebrities go through money. They have to pay taxes, lawyers, publicists, agents, accountant, cheetos representatives, etc. Then they buy all sorts of crap they don’t need, like that ferrari they trashed not too long ago (what a damn shame). She’s renting a $38,000 a month house on Maui, yet she’s staying at the 4 Seasons hotel. WTF? Then she has that Malibu money pitt house of hers, that house in Louisiana, she hires private jets to travel. It all adds up. Then she has that leech husband of hers. He alone has cost her a pretty penny.

  47. happy_bunny

    Britney should be the new Cheetos spokesperson. Maybe Frito lay could make a new Cheeto with Britneyessence. Glitter Cheetos.

    BTW: does her nose look really nose-jobby in that pic?

  48. Swordman

    Slothlike simpleton Britney Spears takes a break from bankrupting All You Can Eat buffets so she may work on her latest project – the hit musical “Lard on Ice

  49. MunchkinT

    I’d have to say he’s damn lucky to have met someone so damn stupid. Someone cut his balls off.

  50. DuckBoy

    She gets a portion of the profits from the perfume line.

    Curious was the #1 selling perfume in America last year and Fantasy has taken off as well

    she bought a 4 million dollar house in Hawaii, they are getting it ready right now (painting, decorating, etc.) so she is staying at a hotel right now

    according to her publicist she plans to live in Hawaii for the next few months to record a new album, get into shape, and escape LA for awhile. This is also apparantley why she dropped out of a photoshoot for the July cover of Marie Claire. This formula seemed to work well for Mariah Carey who did the same thing for her comeback CD.

    supposedly she has a trainer with her and a treadmill in her room and is working out daily

    we’ll see…

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