Britney Spears’ parenting skills are exactly what you’d think

August 12th, 2009 // 62 Comments

Seen here yesterday in her braless, side boob splendor (Why did I use that word?), Britney Spears took her kids to a free swag event where they adorably swore like pirates, according to NY Daily News:

While the singer picked up goodies at a swag suite in L.A. last week, Sean Preston, 3, and Jayden James, 2, shocked guests by repeatedly yelling, “Oh shit!”
“We were all surprised by their potty mouths, but it was actually pretty funny,” one onlooker acknowledged.
How did Britney respond to her sons’ antics?
Said the source: “She was too busy picking out freebies to chastise the boys for misbehaving.”

I’m actually impressed all they did was swear. I pictured the two of them fending off guests with butter knives before loading SpongeBob backpacks with turkey legs and cake like they practiced at home. “Mama finds veggies in them bags y’all gonna sleep in the garage again. Now, Jayden, you drive the getaway car while Sean stays behind and takes the rap.”


  1. killerabbit


  2. cletus

    That aint nothin’, just take away them kid’s Mountain Dew and Pork Rinds if you wanna see some real hillbilly fireworks

  3. Kelley

    Hire a stylist. For all her wealth she insists on walking around braless in slutty outfits and looks like a $2.00 cherry.

  4. Fletcher

    After all the craziness, I would still do her…as long as I could sneak out the back door after we were done.

  5. JO JO

    UM Braless is not for everybody!! Especially after 2 kids.. PLEASE report to Victoria’s Secret Immediatly and get a Srapless pushup or Angels NO SHOW.. anything PLEASE.. its time

  6. lizzy

    what is she wearing… ?!
    each of those outfits is pretty horrendous.

  7. aquarian

    Big deal. She actually did the right thing by ignoring their potty mouths. The more you react to it (and that includes giving them trouble), the more exciting and fun the kids think it is. If you ignore it, the kids won’t think it’s so fun to swear and they’ll stop.

  8. bart

    Is that an engagement ring? And that one with her lifting her armpit I was expecting to see hair.

  9. Mac


    I would only do her if I could stick it in her backdoor. Who wants to throw their hotdog down a hallway?

  10. torn

    she’s hot….. yet really stupid, dirty and low class… but somehow the little head wins out and she ends up hot in my mind…………..I feel guilty

  11. Upinya

    She should just go ahead and move into the trailer park now. Maybe a tornado will hit it.

  12. gotmilk?

    wow, she still looks like shit. that hair color makes her forehead look even larger and i didn’t think that was possible.

    i’m pretty sure you’re suppose to put a shirt on under that first outfit. and probably some shorts too.

  13. I wish she would take better care of herself when she goes out–it would help her image and her career since she’s photograpphed by paparazzi all the time.

  14. Dana

    OMG she and Brooke Hogan have so much in common it’s sad…. She used to be such a doll and now look at her…

  15. Sung yung moonpie

    She makes more $$ in one day doing nothing than 98% of the globe! What a country!

  16. JJ Daddy-O

    Does this girl have the rattiest extensions in Hollywood?

  17. Viv

    It’s just that swear words sound so funny in little kid’s voices…imagine what they’d sound like if they said fuck or pussy or asshole or cock or cunt,after all those words are used in daily life right?

  18. uh Uh UH! Yeah ... hand me a kleenex, and clean yourself up. Here's $10, take a taxi home.

    Anyone else think she looks like Courtney Love?

  19. How sad. Another generation of trash.

  20. Gemma

    Ignoring a childs potty mouth is actually the right way to deal with it. Scolding children repeatedly for such things makes them star to use the word as a way to get attention and/or a way to protest. All children have a potty mouth phase, it is best for the child to not make a big fight/drama out of it.

    Apparently Britney did read some parenting books. But the Superficial Writer did not.

    (I do agree about her clothes though. Someone needs to throw her in a trunk and drive her to Rachel Zoes office.)

  21. Leave her alone! You would have a hard time dressing yourself if you were retarded too!

  22. Florence Henderson


    Why don’t you settle down and marry that John Gosselin fellow? He seems to be almost as good a parent as you are.


  23. spare the rod spoil the child

    If my son sweared like that I would whip his ass. Period. The way it’s been done for thousands of years. I know, I should take him to a shrink with a fat nose and get him on prescription meds.

  24. b

    why cant this woman dress herself properly??? Jebus! there is no need for her to look that rough

  25. Oliver Chester The Molester Lester

    She’s like 30 now, right?

  26. ishi-san

    awww, it took her about four days to get back from “looking freshly styled” back to white-trash mama – well done Brit!
    who ever said that you can buy style?!?! You showed us right!! :)

  27. truth

    Did it ever occur to any of you critics, most of whom would love to have Brittany just say hello to you, that maybe the boys learned those words from their father who had them most of the time in the past years????

  28. truth

    Did it ever occur to any of you critics, most of whom would love to have Brittany just say hello to you, that maybe the boys learned those words from their father who had them most of the time in the past years????

  29. pasteve

    Her real reason for dragging the kids along to these things is so she can bum smokes from them.

  30. crazypants

    In pic #4 she’s looking fine as hell. Like really good. All bullshit aside if a woman thqt good approached any straight guy he’d be damn pleased.

  31. JC

    what’s up with the hair? looks like she hasn’t washed it or combed it for 2 weeks!!!!
    wtf??? why can’t someone tell her that her hair looks like a rat’s ass!!!!!!

  32. Anon

    haven’t you seen all those clips of her at gigs swearing her trashy mouth of at young children?
    They got it from her.

  33. Sport

    Stay classy, Brit.

  34. truth

    She has a weird combo of features. She is hot, stupid, trashy, saggy, skinny, and fat all at the same time

  35. britneysucks

    It doesn’t matter which parent they got it from–they need to be told that it’s wrong. The “ignore it and it will go away” attitude is the worst parenting of all. I have two kids and they do not swear around me. My son is 18 and he said “dick” once and that was the only time. Teach your kids manners and respect you shitty trashy stupid fools. Btw kids mimic their parents and act just like they do you morons.

  36. Candy

    Hey, the guy of victoria’s secret is right!!!!!!

    HEY AD-GURUS!!!!!

    Don’t put Adriana Lima or Mirand Kerr on victoria’s secret advertises anymore, because their boobs are gorgeous, if britney spears boobs looks great in a “PUSH-I-DON’T-KNOW-WHAT-BRA” I, by myself, will buy a 100 of them!!!

    So britney for the next vs model!!!

    Sorry britney I do love you but you have money and you could take better care of yourself… You are looking like … me, and I am poor and uneducated!

  37. Tom K

    Good to see her kids take after her and her wigger ex husband.

    Once again she looks like shit!!!!!

    Also I’m tired of these excuses from people about, “oh she had two kids” and “she’s older now”. Give me a fucking break!! There are plenty of other celebrities who are older and are still as hot as they were after kids……Gwen Stefani, Jessica Alba, Cindy Crawford, Heidi Klum……the list goes on. So everyone stop making excuses for this pig. Fact of the matter is she used to be really hot, she married wigger trash, then went crazy and got nasty looking. She will never recapture her glory days. She is always going to look like a college football player in drag pretending to be Britney Spears. I actually think she enjoys looking like shit.

  38. Britney is a JOKE

    Why do I feel like calling plays for a football game while looking at these photos? She looks like a linebacker! This trailer trash idiot needs to realize that she can’t pull off the no bra thing – - my grannies teets look better than hers. Honestly!

  39. Xtine

    Britney has more money than since! And its showing!

  40. Jeffer

    Still fat, still a useless whore.

  41. Anastasia Beaverhausen

    What I don’t understand is how this big handful of trailer trash crazy is able to escape LOOKING LIKE THAT!!! Seriously, this broad has so many handlers that SOMEONE should catch the whack job on the way out of the door and say MAYBE we’ll take things down a notch, hmmm?!

  42. GOD! I don’t understand, Britney, wwhhhyyy!!

    Put on a freaking bra, get a hair stylist, get some facials, and learn to do your makeup! She looks so bad, and she doesn’t have to!

    If she would get some bangs cut and do a shoulder length wavy style, or something clean and simple looking, it would pull her face together so much better. And not letting her boobs sag like that would do a woorrrrld of good, all she needs to do is put on a bra – It’s that simple!

    Does she have no friends?! I would never let my friend leave the house looking like that.

  43. Britney was a sweetheart to us and we think she is looking great- tan, toned and smiling!

    If you see anything you want from her shopping spree, just check out

  44. roxy

    Have you noticed the way Britney’s assistant Brett ALWAYS copies her? It’s not fair… however I love Britney’s shoes

  45. @ 7, 20 – Yeah, that definitely seems to work in trailer parks and housing projects. Just ignore them and smoke some more cigarettes, have a beer. Those kids grow up to be doctors and lawyers and meth dealers running cock/dog fighting operations.
    Those parents that do all that parenting and role modeling and provide guidance and have perfectly behaved children that win all those awards in school and have the admiration and praise of their community, they’re doing it all wrong.

  46. Nate

    She is SO unattractive. I never thought she was anything special, but damn she’s even more repulsive now than ever. Her face is so off…..her eyes are like 2 feet apart. Horse faced tranny-looking pig!

  47. Teri Busa

    Who has primary custrody of the kids ? Dad, so that’s who’s to blame, they heard him saying it.

  48. Why do people always want to patronize Britney? Christina Aguilera’s kid had a black eye the o/day and no one even mentioned it.

    Check out my celebrity psychic predictions @

  49. isis mean damn, are the ppl goin to comment how her chyte smell…everybody dont wear bras or panties…and oh shit…come now if she would have discipline her boys you all would have said she was abusing them…so its damn if she do and damn she dont…ppl in this world need to get a life and stop criticizing others on how they raise their children…we all have to learn, if she is not physically abusing them just shut up…you have ppl cursing all over the place in your surroundings on tv etc……gesh

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