Britney Spears & Kevin Federline settle custody case (Which means absolutely jackshit)

July 18th, 2008 // 26 Comments

Lawyers for Britney Spears and Kevin Federline have reached a settlement in their custody battle. Britney agreed to allowing Kevin full custody of the boys while keeping her visitation intact. More visitation will be granted towards the end of the year, according to TMZ:

The settlement is a huge development because next month’s trial is now kaput. We’re told Brit, grandpa Jamie and K-Fed all wanted to avoid the expense, emotional wear and tear and media frenzy connected with a full-blown trial.

So, hurray! No more batshit court cases, right? Guess again. That’s like saying I’m not made of sexy neutrons. People reports:

“Until the kids turn 18, we can expect in years to come that Britney and Kevin will be back in court,” says L.A. family lawyer Lynn Soodik, who is not involved with the case. “Britney will have a better chance of winning more custody once she regains her health. This is just the end of Round One.”

Round One? Round ONE!? Jesus, this feels like Round One Million. I could lead a long, productive life never hearing about another Britney Spears court case again. Okay, that’s not true. I’ll lead a short, drunk existence that will ultimately end with someone yelling “Hey, you’re not the pilot!” But you guys get the point.

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Comments (26)

  1. hidethe-cutlery | July 18, 2008 at 12:04 pm

    So nothing changed then?
    Awesome.

    Reply
  2. numbers | July 18, 2008 at 12:07 pm

    second.

    Reply
  3. acne | July 18, 2008 at 12:10 pm

    Anyone notice that she has like a permanent zit right by her mouth? Every picture I see that zit is right there its like she is giving a bucket of lard a blow job…

    Reply
  4. grobpilot | July 18, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    Close to the top. I have no life.

    Reply
  5. havoc | July 18, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    This has gone from just interesting to just sad…..

    .

    Reply
  6. A | July 18, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    It does feel like round one million, Fish. I’m sure they’ll be back in court soon enough.

    Reply
  7. Biff | July 18, 2008 at 12:12 pm

    Gee, what an insight from “L.A. family lawyer Lynn Soodik” – you mean to tell me Britney’s not in the best bargaining position while being declared incompetent to manage her own financial assets???? Really??? Because I would have thought that was a major strength for her to play up during the settlement proceedings, along with her ability to stain every single piece of clothing she owns.

    Reply
  8. veggi | July 18, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    I’m glad this phase is settled, for the sake of the two little retards. And also for the children.

    Reply
  9. rough daddy | July 18, 2008 at 12:19 pm

    youd think shed squeeze out those yellow puss, thats in those huge pimples, by her chin before she go out….

    Reply
  10. Sportsdvl | July 18, 2008 at 12:20 pm

    #7 – lol, no doubt. I always love it when they get some other “expert” to chime in with their 2 cents worth. Of course, like most attorneys, Lynn Soodik is simply retarded.

    Reply
  11. A | July 18, 2008 at 12:22 pm

    Hey acne – I agree…what’s with that zit? It’s always there on her ugly face.

    Reply
  12. havoc | July 18, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    I find Kevin attractive. But I would bathe in Britneys piss.

    .

    Reply
  13. retard alert | July 18, 2008 at 12:29 pm

    Nice dress grandma.

    Reply
  14. Omnibacon | July 18, 2008 at 12:37 pm

    Britney has kids?

    Reply
  15. 2for2true | July 18, 2008 at 12:46 pm

    The fact 14 people commented on this story thus far goes to prove it must be summer vacation time for the local cosmetology schools.

    Idiots.

    Reply
  16. B | July 18, 2008 at 12:47 pm

    Britney has nice legs. They’re not all bony and shit like a lot of women out there. They look great.

    Reply
  17. and your name sucks too | July 18, 2008 at 12:47 pm

    You read the comments and wrote one yourself, moron.

    Reply
  18. pete | July 18, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    Britney’s body is a million times better than Claire Danes, which isn’t saying much (unless you’re one of those commenters with the pedo fantasies).

    Reply
  19. kenny | July 18, 2008 at 1:05 pm

    Britney, sit on my face I wanna tounge fuck your puss. damn you so fine.

    Reply
  20. Kate | July 18, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    I hate that pin-straight hair look. It makes her face look even rounder. She needs to tease shit or something to give it some volume.

    Reply
  21. A | July 18, 2008 at 1:17 pm

    Pete, I agree…Brit’s body is way better than Claire Danes. Claire’s just way too thin. When your knees are bony and your spine is protruding, that’s just gross.

    Reply
  22. gerard Vandenberg | July 18, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    …………….MAY I SHIT ON HER FACE, please?

    Reply
  23. ___________________________________ | July 18, 2008 at 3:12 pm

    What a disgrace. That stupid bitch never really wanted those kids in the first place. Now watch her go pop out a couple more with that dune coon…er…Adnan.

    She should be forcefully sterilized.

    Reply
  24. Kim Lardassian | July 18, 2008 at 4:54 pm

    Next time heifer hips wants to get s bit of media attention this will be resurrected definitely.

    Reply
  25. jay wye | July 18, 2008 at 8:48 pm

    Short, squat, thick, ugly, hideous ears, saggy lopsided boobs, dumb. Not much left to say.

    Reply
  26. booyah! | July 19, 2008 at 3:00 am

    Hey, I actually own that dress she’s wearing!! eeeww…. I used to love it… now i wonder if it looks trailer trash?!

    Reply

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