Britney Spears is not a federal case

By: The Superficial / February 27, 2008

It’s apparently legal day on The Superficial. New York attorney John Eardley was shut down yesterday in his attempts to prove Britney Spears is being held captive and that her conservatorship case should be heard by a federal judge. No one could figure out what angle this guy was working, but it obviously didn’t work. People reports:

“Mr. Eardley fails to explain why he can bring this claim for her in the first instance. He cannot,” Gutierrez said in his three-page ruling. “Mr. Eardley had no authority to remove the case from state court. He is neither a party nor a defendant. While he claims to be Ms. Spears’s attorney, the probate court … found that she was incapable of retaining her own counsel.”

Britney Spears’ legal conundrum is so ridiculous that the judge could file a ruling stating, “So I communicated to Mr. Eardley ‘Dude, what the fuck? Your shit makes no sense and I ain’t got time for no jibber-jabber.'” This once again proves that Mr. T should handle any and all legal cases so I’m entertained and get to watch fools be pitied. The defense rests and will now eat a Pop Tart if it pleases the court.

Photos: Splash News