Britney Spears has become increasingly concerned with her appearance. Instead of promoting her album or planning a tour to revive her dying career, Britney is gearing up for a slew of plastic surgery, according to OK! Magazine:
“She’s always worrying about what she looks like,” one friend of the “Toxic” songtress reveals to OK!. “She checks pictures of herself on the Internet every night and criticizes every single one.”
Britney had lip injections done in October and her line-up of cosmetic work will reportedly include her second nose job and third boob job:
On her checklist: liposuction of the abdomen, hips and thighs ($18,000); a breast lift with change of silicone implants ($25,000); a mini tummy tuck ($18,000); and work on her nose ($20,000). Grand total: $81,000!
Dear Britney,
I’m into writing letters this week. Now that I know you spend every night critiquing pictures of yourself on the Internet, I thought I’d take a minute and extend the proverbial olive branch by recommending an awesome plastic surgeron. The guy’s fantastic. His name is Dr. Jan Adams and he did some amazing work on Kanye West’s mom. I even hear there’s a Starbucks next to his office. You should seriously check him out. Like right now. In fact, I’ll even book the appointment. No need to thank me. It’s what friends do.
Smooches,
The Superficial Writer
Auntie Kryst | December 6, 2007 at 9:38 am
Concerned about her appearance? She’s looking possessed, wanting to dig into that cake. The Fucktard needs to feed.
Auntie Kryst | December 6, 2007 at 9:38 am
Cocerned about her appearance? She’s looking possessed, wanting to dig into that cake. The Fucktard needs to feed.
True Britney Spears | December 6, 2007 at 9:41 am
Ok, Superficial. I’ve read your letter. Go fuck yourself.
If you ever make fun of me again, i will sue you
LayDeeBug | December 6, 2007 at 9:42 am
God I hope she’s reading this.
YOUR LOOKS ARE NOT THE PROBLEM.
YOU’VE ALWAYS LOOKED GOOD WHEN YOU WORKED OUT. WORK OUT BITCH!!!
SURGERY IS FOR SUCKERS. STOP GETTING HIGH AND DRINKING. WAAAAAAKKKKEEEEE UUUUUPPPPP!!!!!!!
YOU’RE BEHAVING LIKE A MENTAL CASE. STOP BEING A SLUT. GET A GRIP!
Ash | December 6, 2007 at 9:42 am
Haha, nice.
Auntie Kryst | December 6, 2007 at 9:43 am
Goddamn double post. My bad. She’s still a swamp hag though.
britney spears | December 6, 2007 at 9:45 am
hey y’all….
i was havin’ me some seriously fun on my birthday.
don’t y’all look back on pictures from yourself when you was at your prime.
sometimes i wish i were 19 or 21 again.
remember that lady anna nicole, sometimes i wish i looked like her.
she is real purdy.
gotta run, i’ll let ali finish the rest.
chow
p.s.
thank you so much for the advice superficial writer i’ll get right on it, dr. jane adams you say. what happens when you snort somethin’ and it smells minty?
ADVICE FOR BRITNEY | December 6, 2007 at 9:53 am
WHAT>!!
BRITNEY :
YOU AREN’T THAT BAD. GET YOUR WEAVE FIXED OR TAKE IT OUT, STYLE IT EVERY DAY. THE WEAVE CURRENTLY IS TOO LONG, CUT IT TO ALIL PAST YOUR SHOULDERS.
GET SOME LONG BANGS, STRAIGHTEN IT, CURL IT ON THE ENDS.
TAKE BETTER CARE OF YOUR SKIN,
WHEN YOU GO OUT WEAR A WELL BLENDED COAT OF FOUNDATION, SOME EYE LINER, MASCARA, AND LIP GLOSS.
HIRE A STYLIST, CAUSE YOU CAN’T DRESS YOURSELF
WEAR PROPERLY FITTING BRAS AND PANTIES
AVOID FOOD SPILLS
TREAT YOURSELF TO MANICURES AND PEDICURES, NOT ACRYLICS.
LOSE 10 -15 POUNDS
GIVE YOUR CHEST A CHEMICAL PEEL
DO THAT AND YOU WILL NOT NEED SURGERY, YOU WILL LOOK HOT.
Speed Racer | December 6, 2007 at 9:54 am
How about looking at your kids instead of looking into the mirror! And while you’re at, maybe play with them and teach them how to read, manners and everything else a PARENT is supposed to do. When you became a parent, THAT became your MOST IMPORTANT job!!!!!!!!!
Italian Stallion | December 6, 2007 at 9:54 am
That’s actually pretty funny…….
Dear Britney,
Your music is fucking horrible. You used to be really hot, what happened? Have you ever heard of a salad? I never thought I would ever say this to a woman, but when you’re not wearing drawers, close your fucking legs. The smell is unbearable and you are destroying the ozone. Try not to drop your kids on their heads anymore. It’s not their fault that you are their mother. Leave it to Kevin, even that douchebag is a better parent then you. There’s tons of other shit to tell you but this is getting lame and you probably can’t even read what I’m writing. Trust me, I’ve seen some of your letters. C U Next Tuesday!!!!
P.S. Have you ever gone swimming with Great Whites? It’s a total rush and you don’t even need a cage. It’s best to go when you’re on your period…………..
Lys | December 6, 2007 at 9:55 am
She shouldn’t wear this kind of dress… Nobody should. It makes you look like a prostitute. Can’t she dress herself with taste? I mean, she’s not even that bad. Wash your hair and forget about the smoky eyes that makes you look sick.
ADVICE FOR BRITNEY | December 6, 2007 at 9:57 am
JUST TRY HARDER,
NORMAL PEOPLE KNOW HOW TO PUT THEMSELVES TOGETHER BETTER THAN YOU
YOU USED TO KNOW HOW TO DO IT KINDA SORTA
YOU ARE NATURALLY PRETTY WITH LONG EYELASHES, A PRETTY SMILE, AND A CUTE BUTTON NOSE
JUST TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF LIKE A NORMAL 26 YEAR OLD WOMAN WOULD!
Jen | December 6, 2007 at 9:59 am
Ok, Super. Writer — too harsh. We want Brit-Brit to go away for a while, not DIE. C’mon, man.
Kim | December 6, 2007 at 9:59 am
Eeeewwwwwwwww. She has age spots on her thighs!
scooby | December 6, 2007 at 10:01 am
JESUS H CHRIST, FIX YOU’RE HAIR FIRST, THEN YOUR FAT ASS BODY!!!!
Wannabe | December 6, 2007 at 10:02 am
Maybe she should spend $81,000 on parenting classes instead. GAH! Waste.
Z | December 6, 2007 at 10:03 am
you dont make fun of someone who died. thats not cool.
diet dr.pepper | December 6, 2007 at 10:03 am
#8
I wish she could see that. you are so right.
In addition:
she should also stay away from drugs, i don’t think she handles them well
she should go out less, maybe just one night every two weeks go out and be seen
she should try to get her kids back, stay at her house, not the four seasons.
hire a maid and a nanny to help her.
get rid of sam lufti and alli simms
and get some voice training and go to the gym and practice dance if she still wants a career.
listen to ME britney | December 6, 2007 at 10:09 am
wrong surgeries
i say no nose job
her nose is adorable
first lose 15 pounds,
chemical peel the chest, no more real tanning, fake it
lipo under the chin,
fill the creases in the neck with botox
that is all
oh
and fix the weave and learn how to dress.
ashrock | December 6, 2007 at 10:10 am
AHAHAHAHAHA
she read it?? and threatened to sue?
SO FUCKING FUNNY!!!!
hey brit brit – instead of gettin plastic surgery to help your appearance – why don’t you first start with fixing your godawful hair and wear some frigging makeup once in a while!!!
jesus!
woodhorse | December 6, 2007 at 10:10 am
They played her music at the Skatium last night. If you want to roller skate, the music’s not bad.
Gerald_Tarrant | December 6, 2007 at 10:10 am
She must idolize Nicole Kidman and Joan Rivers.
Exyank | December 6, 2007 at 10:11 am
That’s ridiculous. If she was really looking at pictures of herself on the internet, she’d see how completely hideous her hair looks, and she’d order some ProActiv for her skin. There’s no way she has a clue what she actually looks like.
circadianrhythm | December 6, 2007 at 10:11 am
Sadly, they can’t surgically correct crazy. Actually, that’s not true…it’s called a lobotomy, but I’m pretty sure they don’t do them anymore.
Snuffaluffagus | December 6, 2007 at 10:11 am
Bullshit. She didn’t have implants. Implants don’t sag.
Italian Stallion | December 6, 2007 at 10:13 am
@ 21 Do you know how I know you’re gay? Read your comment, it’s all right there………..
Jimbo | December 6, 2007 at 10:13 am
Britney needs to ask the great Oz for a brian
diet dr.pepper | December 6, 2007 at 10:13 am
you are right #23.
I don’t believe this story
fergernauster | December 6, 2007 at 10:13 am
She can spend $250,000.00 and it still would never fix her downy eyes.
Snuffaluffagus | December 6, 2007 at 10:14 am
13: Speak for yourself.
Texas Tranny | December 6, 2007 at 10:14 am
#11,
I like the dress, especially the choker, it hides the adam’s apple.
cheynne | December 6, 2007 at 10:15 am
That is completely sick and uncalled for.
dr. phil | December 6, 2007 at 10:16 am
can she get a personality lift? no one cares about you, no matter how fine you look, when you’re acting the way she does. like my grandmother always said “you can dress a turd in the finest imported fabrics and jewels and it’ll still be shit.”
Danklin24 | December 6, 2007 at 10:16 am
Ouch, that Kanye west’s mom thing was pretty damn low, even for this sight. No need to make fun of a guys mom dying. Thats just distasteful.
Superbad | December 6, 2007 at 10:17 am
ENOUGH WITH THIS BRITNEY POSTS !!!
FUCKIN HELL
Italian Stallion | December 6, 2007 at 10:17 am
@32 Whatever, nagger. Shit’s funny…………
Superbad | December 6, 2007 at 10:18 am
now Scarlett posts..that’s more like it ..yeah
woodhorse | December 6, 2007 at 10:19 am
@24 yes, they do. At State facilities for the criminally insane. They are called “singleotomies” because they only go in one eye as opposed to the old days when the “ice pick surgery” was done in both eyes. Don’t fret. It’s actually necessary.
Easyaspie | December 6, 2007 at 10:21 am
The simplest way for Britney Spears to get hot again is to stop smoking. Her skin is gross, her eyes and teeth are yellowing, I’m sure she smells pretty awful… But seriously, how unattractive.
woodhorse | December 6, 2007 at 10:22 am
Italian Stallion. Fuck man, I’m not Grendals’ mother, the kids like to skate and they’re too young to go by themselves. OK, sometimes I skate too and I try not to look gay when I do it. There is this really nice gay woman that skates with me sometimes but there’s nothing I can do about how I look when she does that.
hmm | December 6, 2007 at 10:23 am
i like her eyes #29
down syndrom eyes are usually small and almond shaped and closed together, i.e not like hers at all.
her eyes are large and wide set, a classic pretty estrogen feature.
i say the surgery wont fix her craziness or her weave, which are her real problems, not her eyes.
diet dr.pepper | December 6, 2007 at 10:26 am
39 – fixing her weave is more important, her teeth are white.
atleast smoking will help curb her appetite.
Italian Stallion | December 6, 2007 at 10:27 am
@40 Funny……
Ript1&0 | December 6, 2007 at 10:28 am
Yeah, dude, Fish – this is where the line is, and you just crossed it.
____________________________
Unabashedly, albeit. Ok, kudos for that.
Muffin is a coke whore | December 6, 2007 at 10:29 am
There is no way she looks at pictures of herself and critiques them. If she did that she would stop making all of those stupid faces at the camera and would fix her damn hair.
Gurney | December 6, 2007 at 10:31 am
Maybe some hair plugs should be on the tap as well. Check out the slap head in those pics. Good. Lord.
And perhaps a gym membership instead of lipo. Lest her backside grow to love-hewitt-ian proportions.
Mr. Truth | December 6, 2007 at 10:31 am
@LayDeeBug: Comon! Let her do the surgery! It will give me some good laughter for times to come. Besides, she’s become so dumb i don’t think she can read anymore, she just looks at the pretty pictures.
Letta | December 6, 2007 at 10:37 am
I think that was terrible what you guys said. Dr. West lost her life and that was a heartless comment. You should think about the thing you write before posting it. That was TERRIBLE……………….
Ript1&0 | December 6, 2007 at 10:45 am
PS= Britney Spears might be reading this, but guess who ELSE is???
puffs plus lotion | December 6, 2007 at 10:47 am
who?