Britney Spears is a pain in the ass (Gasp!)

December 3rd, 2008 // 38 Comments

Seen here celebrating her birthday last night at Tenjune, Britney Spears proved earlier in the day that she’s still got it. And by it I mean the ability to act like a raging diva despite, just months ago, nose-diving her career into the shitter. Britney was scheduled to perform at the Rockefeller Center tree lighting ceremony, but has already pulled in and out of the gig enough times that she should at least call the next day. OK! Magazine reports:

“You have no idea how many times Britney has changed things on us, at least 14 times since I got here on Thursday,” a source connected to the TV special tells OK!. “It is Britney Spears and she can do that because they want her to boost ratings, but no one is happy putting up with this. I probably shouldn’t say this, but guys on the crew were making bets about whether she would show up at all.”
One eyewitness tells OK! that Britney had been scheduled to appear live on Wednesday night’s broadcast, but that plan was ultimately scrapped in favor of a pre-taped “message.”
“She was originally supposed to perform live and then she wanted to pre-tape her performance instead,” the source says. “Then she didn’t want to do that. She keeps changing her mind and now she’s not performing at all.”

If I were Britney Spears, I’d take any goddamn work I could get my crazy hands on. I’d be all over it: “What’s that? A cameo in a dog food commercial. I’m in! I’ll do anything. Do you want me to eat the dog food? Or do you want me to eat the dog? I’ll eat the dog. I’ll munch him right up. Nom nom nom. I’ll do it. I’ll fucking do it. Because, wow, do I need money. Money money money. Will somebody get some ketchup on this dog! AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGH!” *collapses*

Then again, I’m a professional.

EDIT: Added pics of Britney taping her tree lighting appearance which will undoubtedly be Exhibit A in the Congressional hearing on “Why the hell did the terrorists attack us again? And maybe they’re on to something.”

superficial

  1. Aerialgreen

    Nom nom nom, what’s Christmas?

  2. I would like to be a pain in her ass, she is looking good again…

  3. bored

    you can totally see the top of her right nip in this one

  4. Anna

    That dog eating bit was funny as hell.

  5. p0nk

    mimi, help all of us h8ers out here. we know that you and BritBrit are like this (fingers crossed). gives us the scoop.

  6. K

    forget britney for a sec, someone needs to give me the mimiscoop. all i know is something about trailors and north carolina and million dollar mansions. yea. mimi + britney forever?

  7. Pathetic Worm

    If Britney were to make “NOM NOM NOM” noises in a dog food commercial I would definitely buy that shit. I’d even buy a dog to EAT that shit.

    The ball is in your court, TV ad people.

  8. joe m

    Britney is really a good person who is still struggling.
    She’s not completely healed.
    She needs our prayers and understanding.

  9. ___

    #8, STFU, idiot.

    If the producers of this event had any interest in retaining their credibility, they would tell Britney to take a long walk off a short pier.

  10. Jeezy

    Them titties are lookin’ pretty good these days…

  11. havoc

    She should get down on her knees and thank her dad for saving her career.

    And then blow him….

    .

  12. Ted from LA

    OK I’m back! Damn she looks hot enough to ass fuck. I’d bet even Randal would jump on that if given a chance.
    Listen, if we can work on this site a bit I will promise not to leave anymore.
    OK?

  13. Hahah! I have never been a fan of Britney Spears.. What a loser..

  14. HuckyDucky

    “Pulled in and out enough that she should at least call the next day.”

    HILARIOUS!!!

  15. Irregardless, I’d love to lick those breasts.

  16. mafme

    Taped message? What the eff? A taped message is what people do who are too busy and important to show up– presidents, soldiers, etc. not friggin entertainers. that’s like the caterers sending a video saying, “Hey! Hope you’re having a good reception, congratulations again! We’re sorry that we couldn’t make it, but we ordered you all some pizzas!”

  17. Oh. Cool. Britney’s 500th “big comeback” that ends up being mediocre crap. Pre-taped? She can’t even stand in front of a live audience and say a sentence or two? Sad.

  18. ummm...yeah

    Know what Ted?
    Nobody fuckin knew you left….haha, you give yourself way to much credit dude…and in case you haven’t heard Randal doesn’t have a dick…dam are you on a roll or what?
    Fuck that skank Shitney…I’m fuckin sick to death of that nasty cunt.

  19. Ted from LA

    Hey 18 why don’t you go give Randal’s balls a massage?

  20. Dozer

    @ Famous Plastic. We can’t have a live performance. People are still to traumatized by her jiggly abs from her MTV “comeback” performance last year.

  21. frame

    Same fat and ugly and talentless pig she was before, just now starving herself and wearing more makeup and better clothes.

    Lipstick on a pig………….

  22. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” Wealthydater. c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now? ?????????????????

  23. Jamie's Uterus

    What would she really do at the tree lighting anyway? Walk around, waive her arms, pretend to dance and lip synch? Who the fuck would want to see that disgusting display?

  24. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” Wealthydater. c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?

  25. Funeral Guy

    she might be a total asshat but ya gotta admit her boobage is smokin’.

  26. The eating dog bit sucked shit. Britney could have done a better job writing.

  27. RAWR!

    Thank god Britney is once again worthy of my fecal droppings. I would spread it like butter all over her body, lick it off, and then make out with her while she is on the toilet. RAWR!

  28. I am just a bit curious..the magazine HOLLYWOOD GOSSIP reported her profile was found on the famous rich men seeking affairs site !!!.sugar baby __myinterracialmatch.com__ last week and she was seeking her sugar daddy there. wow!!

  29. Spagett!

    stupid whore. who gives a flying fuck about her. seriously, dont encourage it, fucking idiots

  30. terry

    this bitch is a no talent. The industry created her ass. Clive davis’ lil project.

  31. I wonder: CAN THIS GIRL BE KILLED, folks?

  32. AmberDextrose

    LAST!

  33. Trigger

    Sorry, but Britney is very hot. I would do damn near anything she asked–lick her feet, tongue her butt, jerk off for her and her friends while they drink wine and giggle. I’m all hers….

  34. Ram Punchington

    “Pulled in and out enough that she should at least call the next day.”

    If there were a Nobel Prize for Funny, that line would win it.

    Punchington Out.

  35. Britney is as bitchy as Tootie here -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZgauchvx3c Fucken divas! They are lucky to have a career in the first place…

  36. brandy

    to ummm…yeah ,frame and spaghett and terry.
    you are all sick,nasty disgraces to the human race. your going to burn in hell for your sick and twisted minds and gutter mouths. obviously a bunch of uneducated,ugly, no talented, miserable leeches on society to say the nasty things about a youg woman who is trying.

  37. brandy

    to ummm…yeah ,frame and spaghett and terry.
    you are all sick,nasty disgraces to the human race. your going to burn in hell for your sick and twisted minds and gutter mouths. obviously a bunch of uneducated,ugly, no talented, miserable leeches on society to say the nasty things about a youg woman who is trying.

  38. brandy

    to ummm…yeah ,frame and spaghett and terry.
    you are all sick,nasty disgraces to the human race. your going to burn in hell for your sick and twisted minds and gutter mouths. obviously a bunch of uneducated,ugly, no talented, miserable leeches on society to say the nasty things about a youg woman who is trying.

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