I’ve heard a lot of Britney Spears stories in my day, but this is the first one that made me want to immediately die afterward. Page Six reports:
The pop tart took time off from her “Circus” tour to do an Elle magazine shoot, our spy says, and it was a disaster. “They dressed her in all these beautiful couture clothes — and, well, let’s just say she forgot what time of the month it was. It wasn’t pretty.”
The scariest part of this article? Britney’s menstrual cycle suggests she’s still able to bear children. — Mommy!
NOTE: Please feel free to correct me on that assumption in the comments, but keep in mind I have a penis and therefore secretly think vaginas can talk.
Photo: Mavrix
Not all of us are lucky enough to be able to set our watch by our cycle. Some of us get to play the when will it start this month game. When your cycle is somewhere between 24 and 35 days, accidents happen all the time.
First of all, that has never happened to me in any circumstance. Who are these women that have had accidents? I guess these women cant count 28 days from the last time they had a visit from Aunt Flo so as to be prepared. Brit not noticing a string hanging out? Of course she didnt. Thats the biggest “no duh” since Bristol Palin got knocked up at 17. Oh and yes, she is fat.
Guess we all now know….Kfed got his red wings….
So why aren’t there pics on the Net yet? The WWW is starting to back out on its obligations.
lots of girls do blood squirting from their vagina for their fans. britney’s just jumpin on another band wagon for her fans. niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee … i am a fan of britney spears and i like it!
OMG…I love britts but sometimes i wanna do this to her…and so would you!
Wow, men really do freak out at menstruation.
Granted a tampon would cure her photo shoot ills…..but still, it’s so funny to see all of the men freak out over a woman’s cycle…..would they say the same thing about a finger cut ? Haha.
Y’all are stupid. Girls get their period every month since the time they are 12. They know when they are menstruating. If y’all this is real you are stupid.
Y’all are stupid. Girls get their period every month since the time they are 12. They know when they are menstruating. If y’all think this is real you are stupid.
BOSTON BITCH, your name seems to be true. Who are these women? Hey, have ya ever heard of irregular periods? Ever heard of Endometriosis? Yeah, do some research before you decide to be a bitch. As if your Boston ACCENT wasn’t enough. “BOSTON IN THE HOUUUSSSEE!” I hope you realize 90% of the world finds you annoying. Toodles! ;)
IS IT STRANGE PEOPLE SEE AMERICA AS A LOSERS’COUNTRY TODAY, folks?
well, as long as she’s alive, NOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Oh seriously, whoever is saying this, if it’s true, has issues…
Sorry to gross you all out but that happens to women all the time, sometimes the damn thing comes around a week early, especially when you’re traveling a lot and stressed.
What can you do? It’s a period, can’t people grow up?
Low even for FSH… get a fucking life.
Oh seriously, whoever is saying this, if it’s true, has issues…
Sorry to gross you all out but that happens to women all the time, sometimes the damn thing comes around a week early, especially when you’re traveling a lot and stressed.
What can you do? It’s a period, can’t people grow up?
Low even for FSH… get a fucking life.
To #38 –
Blood shooting out from her?
That does not happen. How old are you? If there is blood shooting out of a vagina, EVER – there’d be ambulances everywhere… That’s the STUPIDEST thing I’ve ever heard.
Irony.
#30 made me laugh so hard I got coffee on my screen…
it’s okay to call someone f*cking retarded, but don’t you DARE disrespect the couture clothes, BYOTCH!
why does it happen to american girls? ? ?
?
this and nail paint coming off. ugh
I have to laugh at the women on here who are on the defensive.
Yes we know women have accidents but when was the last time you heard of this?
If someone had wet themselves would you be on the defensive then or laughing at them for being so stupid?
Lots of women have a slight grasp of their monthly cycle but Shitney doesn’t.
The tampon string on stage, the other bloody tampon incident, this.
She’s just careless.
Er, I’m a woman, and contrary to what bizarre popular belief might imply, We don’t gush like a NYC fire hydrant that’s been turned on in August. Someone read too much Fangoria as a kid. That said, Even if you get ‘caught out’ unawares by an early one, what the hell?! You don’t know it’s happening? Seriously. You’re either on a shit load of drugs or you’re a trashy redneck who knows she’s rich enough that no one’s going to say you’re an unhygenic poor excuse for a woman to your face, because they’re too busy telling you how great you are. Oh, wait.
@68
Total agreement, this shows great lack of self awareness and hygiene on Brits part no excuses please ladies. She is just nasty. She is old enough now to recognize the variety of signals.The woman just didn’t give a shit. NO EXCUSES. Straight up disgusting!!!
NO NO NO NO NO!!!! HOW CAN THIS BE??? What the fuck britney spears, SERIOUSLY. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
@ #9: jesus…. she is so disgusting. who the fuck in their right mind would put her in ELLE??? and VOGUE???
can’t you bitches go to a doctor and get it fixed or something. No man should have too put up with this crap. Probably why Chris Brown had to discipline Rihanna…the stuff messed up his car seat.
Reports said she in fact did have a tampon on but, being akin to sopping up a tsunami with a paper towel, its effects were negligable. Her handlers have purchased a case of Fram oil filters and have had reasonable success avoiding a repeat of the Cajun red tide…
Part II of the tampon popping performance now on YouTube. I guess having her kootchie overused means she needs more than a tampon…
@71 : You are as common as dirt, I am afraid, and for that I pity you. With a push of a button you just proved that yet another one of your type walks the earth. With an outlook like that I am sure the ladies are lined up at your door. Have fun growing old alone.
I will never understand why people try and defend behavior such as Britney’s. Not all cycles come on like clockwork, but you have an ETA for your period. It’s called forethought – you have the info but refuse to use it? Sure sign of someone being at the bottom of the food chain. Natural selection’s a bitch…be careful crossing roads and such, Brit.
Hey I really don’t think she planned on having such an embarrassing moment, nor should it have been splattered all over the internet anyway. All you women who seem to scheduale your periods and tell them when to come and go, how much to flow, and when not to be inconvienient really need to share with the resto of us your secret. As I age, it actually is less predictable, heavier and yes gushes do happen. For some women this is not a “condition” that can be controled. Maybe she is taking medicine that can induce heaver periods. Women who refer to her as gross are sending all women back a hundred years. You are the ones who are gross.
Hey I really don’t think she planned on having such an embarrassing moment, nor should it have been splattered all over the internet anyway. All you women who seem to scheduale your periods and tell them when to come and go, how much to flow, and when not to be inconvienient really need to share with the resto of us your secret. As I age, it actually is less predictable, heavier and yes gushes do happen. For some women this is not a “condition” that can be controled. Maybe she is taking medicine that can induce heaver periods. Women who refer to her as gross are sending all women back a hundred years. You are the ones who are gross.
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where’s the fries?
@74: You better watch your mouth bitch before I punch you in your bleeding cunt again.
It’s completely natural ya’ll. Ya’ll disrespecting a woman’s right to spray blood over couture clothes? What’s the biggie ya’ll? We all have an accident once in a while.
The dresses will probably be on ebay and you can lick them dry. And if you like the taste, you can get back to me, I have a cycle coming up too and my juices taste like golden gravy. Hop on board ya’ll.
Actually I have come to realize there is no such thing as the ‘time of the month’.
My periods have been irregular forever, and will probably continue to be that way, that means I don’t know when they will come during each month. I wanted to get put on birth control pills to make them regular, but when I researched them found out that some of them make things even worse. For example, the shot, can make you bleed almost constantly, and basically most pills apart from the ones that have a high risk of heart attacks cause you to randomly bleed so… she has my sympathy. Nothing else. Most women do not want birth control that makes you have no periods, as you always worry you may be pregnant.
What a bullshit story from some gossiper. Anyway, most women leak at some point. Just hopefully it happens when they are in their house. For someone on the go and around gossiping bitches all the time, it will be hard to keep these normal things quiet
Furthermore you do get PMS symptoms but mine last a week to 2 weeks sometimes, which means I sometimes expect it for an entire week, so ‘prepare’ but it doesn’t come. Then when I think oh it must not be coming, it arrives. It really can happen anytime, a LOT of women do not have regular periods and a huge amount have things like endometriosis or pcos which can make you bleed like god knows what. I don’t see why blood is gross ?
Even I knew when she was going to have her period again, remember? April 28 is when she was onstage with her tampon string hanging out.
To all the haters, especialy teh fat an ugly ones.
I’m ripped an hawt, your ugly and fat. Learn to live with it or put down the ham sanwich lardass.
Stop beng jelous.
yeah, sorry to all you people saying “these things happen!” and “sometimes you can’t tell!” and stupid shit along those lines,
uh, yeah you can. even if it’s irregular, blood doesn’t just come spurting out all of a sudden, you can TELL when things are getting heavy.
she would have had to have been completely retarded to not know whether she was- oh, wait, nevermind.
Ok ewwwwww!
Ummm and for all of you who says this is normal and all women have accidents… sure most women including myself have had accidents. Normally however they are small leaks, spewing your nasty period blood all over fancy dresses and letting you nasty ass tampon string hang out for the world to see is not normal! And if it is for some of you out there i hope to never meet you, or come so close to someone with such low hygiene standards ewwwwwwwwwwwww!
I could’ve swore I heard the same story a few years ago.
Thanks, #82, for over sharing.
I heard someone asked K-Fed why he never went down on Britney and he replied: “Ever try to pull apart a grilled cheese sandwich?”
Alli Watermelon- I would like to respond. Firstly, I was a competitive athlete for 20 years and have always had irregular periods. I never get them every 28 days, it could go months in between. And yet I still have never had an accident. Secondly, Im NOT from Boston. I was born in the suburbs of Carlisle and never have had an accent. Do not assume that everyone from the Boston area has an accent. Ive spend the last 20 years in Arizona tanning and being super skinny so I guess thats why you are jealous. Toodles to you.
twhite- – you are brilliant! Amen squared.
I love BostonBitch, sigh….:)
lets see Alli and BostonBitch kiss and make up!
Remember when Britney looked like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5z-o-GwWof4
Ummm…
I am not some nuts britney FANatic. I’m just actually frankly sick of hearing about her and the INSANE stories are everywhere.
What’s next –
Britney’s poops are a slight yellow color! ??
So I had to call my mom, who is a nurse for an OBGYN & she said –
I’VE NEVER, EVER HEARD OF BLOOD “SPRAYING” OUT OF THE VAGINA ON ANYONE –
AND IF IT DID, SHE’D BE TAKEN TO A DOCTORS OFFICE, OR EVEN ER, IMMEDIATELY!!!
so this story is bullshiiiiiiiiiiit!!!
hahahaha, 95 is the weakest defense I have ever heard.
Here is a related question for all the females here: have you ever poured your period into an ice-cube tray, frozen it, then used “period-cubes” in a drink?
I’m still trying to process the fact that you think that ancient bag of bones Teri Hatcher is the face of God but that young, still firm, Britney is fat and ugly.
Are you Adam Lambert’s girlfriend?
The fact that this is even newsworthy is ridiculous. Just about every girl has had some type of accident like this. If she wasn’t famous, no one would care. So she has a period? If this is the grossest story you’ve ever heard then you haven’t heard many stories which is sad considering you write about celebs. A lot of guys don’t think periods are gross, a lot of guys have sex with girls while they are on their periods. Actually it’s become pretty normal! What I want to know is why she ruined all those outfits, one would think that after the first outfit that they would of said something about it and not let her put on anymore of those expensive outfits without putting in a tampon.