Britney Spears in a bikini

May 20th, 2009 // 109 Comments

Here’s Britney Spears in the Caribbeans with her kids and agent/boyfriend Jason Trawick. Apparently the two of them really are an item, or else she mistook him for Fudgie The Whale and tried to eat him in his natural habitat so he’d die happy. Could go either way on that one.

NOTE: For the record, I’m not calling Britney fat as much as a chocolate-loving leviathan of dumb. Just so we’re clear.

Photos: Mavrix
superficial

  1. angie

    she looks healthy…thats good.

  2. angie

    she looks healthy…thats good.

  3. angie

    she looks healthy…thats good.

  4. a “BURKA” was second choice, folks!!

  5. mafme

    Oh man… why do those legs have to be connected to her? It’s like the ironic wish-fulfillment that someone would get at the end of a twilight zone episode :(

    Wishing to be alone to read forever –> Breaking reading glasses.
    Wanting lovely muscular legs –> terminate in the rest of Britney Spears.

    *dramatic music* “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

  6. Britney looks great, good on you girl!

    Fat? You people are crazy, she looks great and relaxed.

    Want to know how to stop a divorce? don’t look at pictures of Britney Spears in a bikini!

  7. Venom

    I would bang her all day everyday.

  8. Anonymous

    You say Britney but then go on and photos of a capibara. What gives, fish?

  9. 2 schlubs
    2gether
    4ever

    Britneys toadies are out in force here.

    I think that piercing looks worse than the tramp stamp. At least it’s removable. She looks pretty shapely on this day of the week.

  10. bitch

    agreed. this site is the same shit spewed over and over and OVER

  11. bitch

    I wish you would stop making jokes about her eating shit. It’s sooooo fucking repetitive.. She’s not a lard ass.

  12. Evey

    Britney looks fantastic here – toned, healthy, tanned and hot. Anyone who thinks this is fat should really seek help. You can’t win in this world – either too fat or too skinny…Britney looks incredible to me and I think to most people with a set of functioning eyes…

  13. Gando

    Hola!

  14. ishi-san

    she is certainly fit, but not sexy! she looks like a guy in a bikini

  15. Galtacticus

    How old is she? Couldn’t she get that booty more tight!?

  16. Nero

    Who is going to pull the cord what’s coming out her belly button?

  17. hmmm, she is toned and tanned and yes granted she doesn’t have excess levels of fat on her body but she is a thick set girl, with short stubby legs and big ankles. Guess her current figure is a little more achievable for those on this site praising her… typical. you would not look at her twice on the beach!

  18. SlowMonkey

    She is not fat. Superficial Writer, the next time you are porking the Geekologie Writer’s mom, I hope you get impaled by her pelvic bones sticking up on her NOT-chocolate-leviathan hips. Just for the record.

  19. Mikeock

    It’s kind of anticlimactic to see her in a bikini after seeing her shaved biscuit winking at us from the backseat of a limo.

  20. Denise

    Not her hottest, but I must say she’s looking really good! I’m loving the skin tone :)

  21. skippy

    -Doesn’t matter too much what she looks like> she’s crazy and one step away from the next drug binge> enjoy the brief moment ,she’s just b’tween

  22. Very nice… but something tells me she giggles during fellatio… that would piss me off…

  23. Anonymous

    Hey Benson at 7:16……poor baby……don’t get your panties in a bunch. Twitney Spears is a joke in the entertainment industry…….little more than a lip-synching puppet. It’s too bad you don’t know anything about good music…..it might help your outlook. As it is now, you’re just an angry adolescent. Sucks for you, huh?

  24. wtf

    I do not understand the commenters on here.
    When the naked Rhianna pics came out, it was nothing but comments on how disgusting her body was and how she was fat and all this shit.

    Now here’s Britney (who is probably at least 10-20 lbs bigger than Rhianna) and she looks great?

    Damn, those 12 yr old girls and aging housewives must still love her that much. I guess she really is an icon.

    Britney is what you would call a toned (in these pics ) average person. She doesn’t look fat, but I wouldn’t call her up to celebrity standards.

  25. CakeSnifferer

    Not bad…but did a pigeon crap on her lower back? Someone should tell her instead of letting her walk around like that…

  26. lizzy

    SHE LOOKS AMAZING.

    FUCK THE HATERS. BRIT, YOU STILL GOT IT :)

  27. Anonymous

    lizzy…….got what? Terrible mother, no talent to speak of, can’t sing, can’t dance, can’t act, can’t write music, can’t play an instrument, can’t take care of herself, needs a 24/7 babysitter and a fleet of people to take care of her kids since she isn’t capable of doing it herself……..she’s a complete and utter loser. And…….I don’t care how much money she has, since I know you’re going to go there…….face it, your idol is useless and worthless.

  28. Dread not

    Except for the two kids, shaved head, attacking a car with an umbrella, her kid sister getting knocked up, mental hospital “visit”, court dates, driving with her kid in her lap, crashing into parked cars, drunken hot tub make out sessions with strangers, doggie pooping in stores, cheetos smeared designer dresses, hanging with Adnan Ghalib (whatever his name is), flashin’ her twizza with gal pal Paris, swimming in the ocean in her bra and panties, and a marriage to a shiftless Vanilla Ice knock-off who she will support for years to come, it’s like the last four years never happened. Brit does look F’n hot, though. That’s for damn sure.

  29. CakeSnifferer

    Well said, Mr. Anonymous.

  30. lizzy

    anonymous, you’re a dick. why do you have to be a negative prick?

    i couldn’t care less about how much money she has. you went there, not me, asshole.

    what i DO care about is the fact that she’s an amazing performer, and her music is fun and enjoyable.

    you try being in the spotlight for the past 11 years, from the time you’re a teenager, stalked and heckled by paparazzi for your every move during those 11 years, while still putting out platinum records and selling out concerts around the world.

    let’s see how well you could do it, fucker. you can’t.

    she looks great, her latest tour is an incredible success. she seems happy.
    SHE’S STILL GOT IT.

  31. Shane

    In a parallel universe Brittany’s living in a rusted trailer with a collection of plastic lawn jockeys and gnomes in the front yard, sitting in a broken lawn chair drinking Mountain Dew with dirty faced children running around .Her success is a pure fluke, an anomaly.

  32. JPRichardson

    Her legs are awsome. But let’s get real. We will never have the 2002 Britney back again.

  33. Anonymous

    lizzy,

    She’s a terrible performer and her music sucks BIG TIME. She can’t sing to save her life, it takes a bunch of studio wizards to make it halfway listenable, and even then it’s absolutely terrible And this is the life she wanted, so the paps go with the territory. I’m so very sorry that you can’t handle the fact that she is useless. And lizzy…..I’m not being a negative prick…..these are facts that you just cannot deal with. But I love how you call me names…..shows your true colors…..and anyone who buys her albums needs their heads examined….she’s just a teeny bopper idol, she’s not a serious musician and never will be. She is a replaceable teen idol….there have been many before her and there will be many after her…..Miley Cyrus has already replaced her as the flavor of the moment……but lizzy, you keep clinging to you little fantasy….it’s really all you have.

  34. Amber

    Britney looks great! I love her and I’m really happy for her, she’s come a long way

  35. susan

    vacationing has been———hohum

  36. lizzy

    my true colors? god, what about your true colors? you responded to me first. you just had to knock me down for saying “she’s still got it” because i don’t know, for whatever reason, you needed to reinforce all the bad things britney has done, i know you’re perfect and everything but come on.

    there’s no ‘fantasy’ — her record sales and concert earnings are a reality my friend. she’s a great performer, honestly, how could you say she’s not? just because you don’t like her doesn’t mean you can’t give someone the credit they deserve.

    a teenybopper idol? absolutely not. people of all ages love her. and miley cyrus is not even on the same level. miley is a current trend, but britney has been around for a long time and will continue to be around for a long time.

    the life she wanted? no one WANTS a life of being stalked and invaded privacy. but yes, it does come with the territory. and it’s never easy, and there’s no way to prepare for it. and like i said, you could never do it. there’s a fact you can’t handle. the fact that you’re no better than anyone else so you need to sit here and talk about how ‘absolutely terrible’ a celebrity is and bother people like me who are fans.

    she’s not useless. this argument is useless. don’t respond, i’m sick of your bullshit.

  37. CakeSnifferer

    Shane, you paint a picture – there would also be a Little Tykes car in the yard, yes?

  38. Reality check

    #76

    I’M WITH YOU ALL THE WAY!!

    Rhianna’s body blows this tree trunk legs away! Yes, Britney toned up, but she’s still stocky and her build is very thick. Her legs are linebackerish, if you ask me she reminds me of Brooke Hogan in this pics!!!! If she wasn’t toned or muscular, her size would make her fat.

    People calling Rhianna’s nude pictures fat? WTF indeed. Her waist was small and flat, arms skinny, great hip to waist ratio, where as Britney’s waist is a tree trunk.

    i HATE, repeat HATE Rhianna but i am stunned there are so many people saying Brit’s body looks hot here yet they dissed Rhianna AND i see people calling Hayden’s bikini pics fat too, LOL!!! Britney has them both beat by a mile. Guess Britney fans are just so used to seeing a train wreck anything is better!!! FYI, i like Britney.

  39. Anonymous

    Poor lizzy……you got owned and you’re throwing a hissy fit……I love it…..the only people who love this no-talent are fourteen year old girls who have no musical taste or experience in what real music is. Face the facts, lizzy……your idol is a manufactured teen idol without a shred of musical talent. Your useless idol is a faded, so-called performer who is on the decline. 27 years old and still uncapable of taking care of herself and her kids, the kids she ignores. Poor kids are being raised by the nannies. It’s doubtful Twitney even remembers what their names are. Taken away from her by the courts because she wasn’t capable of taking care of them herself……that is absolutely pitiful. And a great performer? Please……she can’t even sing live, and does a pretty bad job of lip-synching to that noise you call music. All she does is strut around and wave her arms. She’s little more than a trained seal. In fact, trained seals at Sea World have more talent than she does, and much more personality as well. Give up, lizzy……..people are laughing at your washed-up idol….and they’re laughing at you as well.

  40. lizzy

    didn’t read it.

  41. Reality check

    #92

    I don’t blame you lizzy, that person sounds bitter. Teens aren’t listening to this chick anymore, i know several women over 30, some frumpy housewives who are listening to britney’s music. Teens have moved on to other pop tarts! Britney is who all the 30 something year olds put on to do their house work to cursing their lame husbands, trust me, i’ve witnessed it. She is no longer a teen idol, far from it, a few vag shots and her shaved head bullshit made that happen.

  42. Jackson

    Notice how the Superficial makes fun of Brit but not liposuction queen/airbrushed photos queen short fat cellulite lumpy body and butt and saggy butt and butt girdle Kim Kardaskank.

  43. Anonymous

    If any 30-year old women listen to Britney Spears, then they deserve to have lame husbands.

    And sure you didn’t read it, lizzy. You know you can’t look away.

  44. Anonymous

    “Teens have moved on to other pop tarts!”

    A very telling statement. Even Britney Spears fans know she’s considered a “pop tart”.

  45. Anon

    Once I stopped judging her by the high standards she set when she was younger and by normal womens standards she looks very good,
    If she had some boobs that would be nice.

  46. Alli

    She’s starting to really look good these days! She’s never going to be a skinny girl. Geezus, look at her…she’s all muscle. She’s a damn brick house and that’s fine. I happen to like her legs. Those legs usually come along with the territory of us ex gymnasts and cheerleaders. Some dig it, some don’t. I like her bikini too :)

  47. Alli

    She’s starting to really look good these days! She’s never going to be a skinny girl. Geezus, look at her…she’s all muscle. She’s a damn brick house and that’s fine. I happen to like her legs. Those legs usually come along with the territory of us ex gymnasts and cheerleaders. Some dig it, some don’t. I like her bikini too :)

  48. heynowdude

    She is f-ing HOT!

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