Britney Spears hires private investigator

November 20th, 2007 // 56 Comments

Britney Spears hired a private investigator yesterday to keep an eye on her ex-husband Kevin Federline. Upon finding out, Kevin’s lawyers immediately pissed themselves laughing. Us Weekly reports:

“I think that if that is what they need to do, or have to do, to have at it,” Federline’s counsel, Mark Vincent Kaplan, tells “I don’t think it will, in anyway, be a good expenditure of funds. But I can’t stop that from happening.”

Mark Kaplan also stated that Kevin Federline could care less about the news:

“I don’t think he would be concerned about it, and I don’t think he has to change anything he is doing in order to address that.”

I don’t know what Britney’s hoping to accomplish. It’s not like Kevin Federline is murdering cocktail waitresses in his basement or something. And even if he was, would it make a difference? Not really. In the meantime, Britney Spears should just focus on whatever it is that she does. Which appears to be driving a car with a blanket on her head. Hmm, kind of an unorthodox way to win back custody of your kids, and some might say a recipe for vehicular manslaughter, but at least she’s trying.

  1. Ted from LA

    Imagine all the cold pizza she could eat in a stakeout.

  2. nikki

    she drives with a blanket on her head and i fail my driving test on bay parking?????

  3. KC

    Look ma! No eyes!

  4. Ted from LA

    I have to run call my mom and tell her I was first today. Now I really have something to be thankful for come Thursday. I’d like to thank all of you for being here to witness this one shining moment in my life. Thank you. I love you all.

  5. Lovely

    Why is she spying on him?? And it’s not so “private” when it’s blasted all over the internet…aren’t those things supposed to be kept on the DL?

  6. Peaches

    She is such a whore face. That’s why she needs to cover face with sweater. So we don’t get herpes from looking at her.

  7. Somebody should give her a big dose of Heparin.

  8. Linus would be impressed………..

  9. Bella

    shes a W-A-S-T-E!

  10. KC

    Maybe she’s just trying to hide those big zits on her mouth.

  11. With each passing day, Britney is falling into the pit of obsolescence.

  12. Biff

    Doctors say her face is “oiling out”

  13. she’s just waiting for that 4th foot to run over. waiting…watching. well, not watching actually.

  14. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    kc…I think she is trying to hide her buttiful lips and moustache!

  15. Bella

    and her lips look like swollen labia’s now…give it up Brit.

  16. smadgie

    Oh my GOD!!! Her face is disgusting!!!! All her $$ and she can’t clear up her acne?! IIIEEEWWW
    It appears to me she needed to snack on something between fast food stops………her hideous jacket was all she could find. mmmmmm gimmee gimme more hoodie please.

  17. BunnyButt

    She should keep that hoodie wrapped around her head all of the time …

  18. Britney Spears appears to be right on schedule for complete and utter destruction of her musical career. Oh wait, never mind, that happened back in 2002.

  19. caljenna66

    Hell, woman, wash your face every now and then and stop with the collagen….ick

  20. caljenna66

    Hell, woman, wash your face every now and then and stop with the collagen….ick

  21. caljenna66

    ….…. I used to snicker at people who posted twice by accident….

  22. Britney, you ignorant slut.

  23. boobs

    Federline should totally setup a fake murder on tape while he knows the “PI” is looking. That would be hilarious.

  24. BLRdom

    leave britney alone, h8rs!!! she will come back bigger. she will endorse proactiv solution like knowbodys business.

  25. Britney is a Cheetos-eating sow

    “Mark Kaplan also stated that Kevin Federline could care less about the news”

    Ummm…. wouldn’t it be that Federline could *not* care less?

    Sorry, just a peeve of mine….

  26. Chef

    Girl, please get some Q-tips and clean your ear out, babe. What happen po-girl? Waiting on your welfare check to come to buy a razor? Then you can shave your legs too. Uh huh. Can’t wait to take my bath, shave and dig dem ear out.

  27. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    Oh Chef! I thought I was the only one who noticed that in these super duper magnified photos. You must be my hero. Can I suck on your chocolate salty balls?

  28. TheTruth

    She now truly deserves the name “Shitney”.


    Doh!!! Stupid capslock..

  30. hausfrau

    Uh, no wonder she runs over everyone-SHE HAS A JACKET ON HER HEAD.

    I wonder if she’s washed that fugly thing since that is all she has been wearing for the past week.

  31. p0nk

    can’t tell if she’s trying to hide under the jacket or eat it. either way, she obviously has enough problems trying to focus on her driving without that distraction.

  32. PunkA

    Brit logic: I am such a shitty parent that I want to now see if I can get dirt of my ex to get the kids taken away from him. That way, I get them back.

    Reality: Brit gets dirt on KFed, kids end up with grandparents or in foster care. Rather getting her shit together, Brit tries Plan B, whicj helps her out ZERO.

    Intervention. Where are her parents?????

  33. Maybe she thinks her shirt is see through?! ;)

  34. woodhorse

    That is the fugliest hoodie, probably the fugliest piece of clothing she owns which is really saying something as she has worse taste in clothing than Bobby Trendy and I hate it so bad that I would actually rather see her neck wattle than to look at that hideously fugly hoodie. If she vomited on it then it would look better. If she vomited on it, shit on it, beat it with an umbrella and set it on fire it could still only be an improvement.

  35. Dear Ted

    God bless you brother, for this is indeed a proud moment for the likes of person’s of our lowly stature. I have tried hard myself to attain what you have proudly achieve here today. If you were here now I would hug you.
    Print this out and hang it on your wall, dear friend. Run my brother.

  36. Not Britney Spears

    ..and apparently she stole the jacket too. Nice. Add theft to the many accomplishments… LOL

  37. Jen

    Couldn’t care less. Or could not care less. Not ‘could care less’. NEVER that.


    Otherwise, boring.

  38. Eye-Dish Lass

    Damn….you people are HARSH. If you had a zillion photogs around you it’s actually shocking she hasn’t actually mowed them all down in one fell swoop. Foot Schmoot!

  39. cookie monsta

    more drivers ed for the minions, in the Shitney Spears “What Not To Do” book of life, I could care less about this fat greasy bush pig !!!

  40. She kind of looks worse than death here. Bad.

    Why is she driving?

  41. Ted from LA

    Consider it done.

  42. Cindy

    Britney is quite crazy these days. I saw her joined the celeb and millionaire singles dating site ( and chatting with other single man. Maybe she wants to find someone for new hook ups just the charlie sheen has done there a couple of months ago. But I’m ashamed of her. She should do something for her kids and spend more time on her kids, rather than dating again.

  43. jack222

    Seems britney has becoming crazy again these days. Someone saw her profile at a millionaire dating site called Will she find a wealthy men for her sons?

  44. Jim Rockford's Answering Machine

    “Y’all Rockford? Ima needin’ a private dick to spy on my babys’ daddy. That sumbitch is after my Chalupa money. Where yall want to meet, my trailer or yours?”

  45. Amy G.

    She should strangle herself with that blanket holding a Starbucks coffee.

  46. Harry W.

    Why doesn’t she just get a job at 7 Eleven? Then she wouldn’t have to drive there all hours of the night to buy her cheetos and coffee.

  47. Jamie

    Her assistants could do all her shopping, she just craves all the attention and then cries about it. Drive off the cliff in L.A. while sipping that Starbucks.

    your lil sister Jaime

  48. CSI--Pomona

    In thumbnail 3, she has a large bruise from resting a chilled 20 oz. Frap there 6-7 hours daily for the last 853 days straight. Or weekend lipo.

  49. linda

    What are you doing? I just found out your secret that you have joined an online ad*ult club sugarmommymeet, by which you are seeking hot man to be your sugar baby.. bi*ch!

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