Britney Spears helps out her winner husband

October 17th, 2006 // 63 Comments
britney-spears-desperate.jpg
superficial

  1. Wampoon.com

    Aww…I wish I had a wife that supports me instead of beating me.

    http://wampoon.com

  2. BLucky

    Even if “the fans” give a complementary hand jobs whenever someone perchases it, they’re still only going to sell about six CDs.

  3. sssucks

    Almost 1st. Looks like Britney has been shopping at T.J. Maxx again. You do get the max for the minimum.

  4. Binky

    Apparently second runner up gets to take K-Fed home and Brit will pay for the divorce.

  5. BLucky

    Um. Please ignore my bad spelling.

  6. I’m not going to win.

  7. How transparent and sad.

    I give better prizes away on my site and at the very least you aren’t replused by them, that always helps!

    http://www.holisticwisdom.com

  8. gatorbates

    Somebody needs to ‘sic a stingray on her.

  9. losenord

    What?! The 1st prize should be to bodyslam the husband. Then I’d probably enter and gloriously win. For sure.

  10. ApacheRose

    I think the “big deal” about the pics isn’t the stupid vest, but that she’s looking somewhat less bovine than she had been. Passing your kids off to nannies and hiring a team of personal trainers and plastic surgeons does wonders for a woman trying to get her figure back in record time.

    In her case, I’m all for it.

  11. RichPort

    Fuck it, I’m entering. I’d love to meet these two simpletons in the hood, then have the neighborhood “Welcoming Party” jack his shit and jack off in her shitter.

    I just reread and see they’re not actually delivering the prize… damn. I’ll have to sit there with the two of them all night as they swear more people are showing up in a minute. Fuck it, I’m still entering…

  12. jrzmommy

    Don’t stop at the stinky sneakers — throw in the broken Trojan-Enz that blessed us all with SPF I & II!! Now THAT’s an incentive.

  13. gatorbates

    Has anyone realized that in the first picture, her melons are in the middle of her torso … closer to her belly?

    Must be one of the following: a) the kids sucking the crap out of them b) K Fed sucking the crap out of them c) she’s getting older, gravity has taken over or d) Lindsay Lohan has been sucking the crap out of them. I tend to lean towards “D”, hence the smile on the whore’s face.

  14. That sweater is sooo not hot on her.

    And I would totally party it up with her so I could laugh. But I would never force such crap on anyone.

    http://www.scandalsnappers.com

  15. HollyJ

    Her clothes and earrings suck, and she still has her linebacker neck, but it looks like she might’ve put down the Cheetos and actually lost most of the baby weight.

  16. I’m going to try to win because I like his music and think the album is great. I don’t think I would want to hang out with them though because that’s just queer………..

  17. jrzmommy

    I wonder why Superfish hasn’t posted about Lindsay Lohan and her new best friend, Rumer Willis?

  18. BigJim

    I bet you could sell a lot of them at skeet shooting clubs.

    Then when you won you could invite all the guys with shotguns over the Brit’s house and let them pepper K-Fed’s cheeto-dusted face.

    Seeing that would make my fucking year.

  19. BigJim

    Seeing as we’re ragging on what the ‘fish hasn’t posted, why no story about Mike Tyson wanting to beat up even more women?

    Ladies, never, ever trust a guy with tattoos on his face.

  20. scamps

    I can’t believe I’m going to say that I love that outfit.

    But I love that outfit.

  21. what she really needs to be “supporting” are those two sagging bags of saline swinging around on her chest.. and why can’t this bitch wash her damned hair before going out in public?

  22. Nyanko

    She looks really great! I didn’t even believe this was a recent picture. She’s lost the weight, and you may not like the sweater but she’s COVERED UP. That’s what counts, people.

  23. jrzmommy

    BigJim: That was no joke? I fell asleep with the TV on and thought Conan was being a wise guy. Mike Tyson really wants to fight women?

  24. bigponie

    I refuse to look at britney in fear that my nuts will fall off so instead I focus my attention on that hangin yellow bag, is it could it possibly be spongebob squarepants.

  25. Haroof

    Wow, those tits have hit the floor.

    Not even 30 yet and she’s sportin granny boobs.

  26. Tracy

    It must be “hour 19″ since her 18-hour bra has obviously up and quit.

  27. Ed Bambrick

    “Britney helps Out her Winner Husband?”

    Shouldn’t that read, “Britney Helps Out her Wigger Husband”?

  28. Superevil

    Having your former poptart wife’s bubblegum tween fans hawk your rap CD is way more gangsta than getting shot 9 times in the chest or selling drugs just to get your demo out there.

  29. JB Fletcher

    my lord her boobs are saggy.saggy saggy saggy,its a funny word
    and what the hell do you mean she lost that baby weight?um HELLO,big baggy sweater vest over turtle neck sweater and untrendy 90 jeans?

    she is obviously trying to hide her SPARE TYRE of a gut.AND cellulite ridden ass and thighs.

    have lypo britney.it worked so well for Tara

    NOT HOT baby,Not hot.

  30. Why not just give everyone a rusty bumper off a ’91 Taurus?

    http://www.celebslam.com

  31. yuckyfresh

    if these are recent pics, she looks way better even with the granny tits.

  32. jrzmommy

    RE: Mike Tyson fighting broads…….why don’t we have a double bill and have Pit Bulls vs. Toddlers, too?

  33. NipsyHustle

    what we need brittany to help kfed do is to die already.

  34. *HelloKitty*

    With all those conservative clothes on I barely recognised her … just thought it was an ordinary middle-aged woman on her way to her plastic surgeon for a boob job.

  35. It kinda looks like her.

    All I have to say is, If Paris hilton and Jessica Simpson couldn’t sell more than 140,000 and 250,000 Cd’s each there is no way this guy is going to.

  36. If Brit’s offering this much to fans for selling CDs, what’d she offer John Cena to bodyslam hubby? Or CSI to put hubby in scene? Notice how in both instances, someone is bitching K-Fag, either with a right cross or a bodyslam? Don’t they get it? I wager Brit fucked Cena for the air time on WWE, and sucked off William Peterson for the CSI shot. Either way, I’m sure the personal degradation was in no way worse than the day she said “I do.”

  37. deyanira_spain

    it smells like lipooo

  38. magickal

    Her body looks a ton lighter…err…better – I mean SPF II was just born, like, what, three weeks ago? A month? Good for her.

    However, what in the sam fuck is going on with that greasy atrocious hair? Yuk. And I’m so over the big gay sunglass fad. Next.

  39. NipsyHustle

    #39—-considering that she had a c-section on Sept 14 and you are not suppose to do any serious working out until 6 weeks afterward, it is safe to say that she’s had her tummy tucked and some lipo done. plus she went straight from one pregnancy into another (which she gained 51 lbs the first time). let’s not applaud her for having enough money to pay to have her fat removed.

  40. Miette

    Wow, good plastic surgery. There’s no way her abdominal muscles have knit back together yet if she did have a c-section…although who knows if she really did. If you can afford it, why not? She doesn’t have a lot of time to waste…she’s got to try to get her career moving. No time for doing it the long, hard way.

  41. Eye-Dish Lass

    She’s 24 or 25 – she will easily recover from this pregnancy. She is going 2 take advantage that Gwen Stefani had her son at 37 and will NO WAY recover. Have you seen Gwen in a half top yet? If she had it 2 show, she would…. 37 doesn’t spring back like 25, and dat’s dat. Britney wants (and will) be the Queen again – she’s been ambitious since she was an embryo. Deal with it – she looks great, and all you Nimrods who think you can have a tummy tuck or lipo when you are still healing from a C-section are just morons. She is on prob just on the Nicole Richie diet.

  42. loagun

    She didn’t have a tummy tuck. Look at the rest of her body, its also thin. If she had a tummy tuck she would have been bed ridden this past month and still have fat arms and legs.

  43. Sweet_cheeks

    that is a complete tummy tuck. yeah sure she looks in proportion to the rest of her body, but trust me, she would not look like that after 2 kids back to back. she should have a mommy pouch of a giant kangaroo.

    zzzzz-listers ( aka the rest of the population ) need to come to terms that ALL celebs get plastic surgery, if they didn’t it would be so popular on Rodeo Drive

  44. tsarinaamanda

    Looks like Shitney’s fans have come to defend their Trailer Park Princess…It’s amazing that she HAS any fans left after hitting the wall head-on at top speed! And you CAN get lipo and a tummy tuck after having a C-Section, a LOT of women do it the day after popping out their crotchfruit.
    I don’t think her pants are that bad, they may not be “trendy”, but ANYTHING is better than those godawful “skinny jeans” that all the Hollywood whores are trying to pass off as the next big thing. I lived through the 80′s the first time around, and I remember the terrible fashion that defined the decade. We really don’t need to re-live the same mistakes again, now do we? At least I sure hope not. But she could have washed that greasy, filthy, clotted mess she calls hair, there’s no excuse for bad hygiene, especially when you’re rich enough to support a worthless wigger deadbeat and two inbred mongoloid children. She probably smells like fish, spoiled milk, and armpits. And I bet her tits leak constantly, which is probably why she’s got them covered up, they’re about to be hitting her knees. Sad to see someone who was once so hot turn out to be so…well…NOT.

  45. magickal

    Yeah – I agree with 42 & 43…..I really don’t think they’d allow someone who is still recovering from a c-section (which I’ve had, and it’s serious surgery!) to have more serious surgery. Besides, she still looks a little curvy – she’s probably just being health conscious for once in a good long time. Maybe she’s wearing a good pair of spanx? who the hell knows…but she looks a lot better than she has in a long time (except for her hair – ewww) and I’m for one happy to see her not fat and not pregnant.

  46. tsarinaamanda

    Britney: Version 2.0

    This is what happens to those who mate with the one known as K-Tard, they go from a hot, successful celebrity with the world at their fingertips, to a saggy, greasy, smelly, lumpy mommy of two quite-possibly retarded kids that will most likely grow up to be dead at 21 of an overdose, or in prison. Poor thing will NEVER recover, no matter HOW much plastic surgery, makeup, or hype she gets. She’s just too pitiful and too much of a laughingstock to be truly successful again. Oh well, no big loss really. I say GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD RUBBISH.

  47. ApacheRose

    Yep, I’ve heard of doctors doing a little tuck while they’ve got mama on the operating table for the c-section. Happened to my aunt, in fact.

    Even if she lost the weight that quickly through diet and exercise, which is not only extremely unlikely, it’s very ill-advised, she’d still have a tummy pooch, just because her skin couldn’t have possibly shrunk back that well yet after two kids so close together.

    Don’t get me wrong, I think she looks loads better, and I hope (I guess) that she returns to being at least a semi-good looking woman, but this didn’t happen naturally. Not in the amount of time she had.

    Next on the list: boob lift. Please, Goddess, get the woman a boob lift, or at LEAST a concrete bra.

  48. NipsyHustle

    #42—-your short bus is parked out front waiting for you to load up. hurry.

    no one said britney doesn’t look better. you can dress a turd in a tux and it will surely look better than it did before. duh! the point is hollywood doesn’t operate in the same reality as we do. if she wants plastic surgery after having a c-section, she’ll get it. money talks all day long and there is no way she could be this thin in a month unless she’s shooting up a trimspa/meth cocktail.

    no one can claim this was exercise cause remember, she’s supposedly been laid up recovering from her “major surgery” so she couldn’t have work it off through anything other than surgery and/or drugs.

  49. kristaldmix

    LOVE “turd in a tux” analogy, possibly the most accurate comment EVER! It’s possible shitney didnt have surgery. I’ve worked for a long time with a woman who pops out kids like gumballs and the bitch is still a size 2. Me on the other hand, not so lucky >wiping cheetoh crumbs off keyboardLOVE “turd in a tux” analogy, possibly the most accurate comment EVER! It’s possible shitney didnt have surgery. I’ve worked for a long time with a woman who pops out kids like gumballs and the bitch is still a size 2. Me on the other hand, not so lucky >wiping cheetoh crumbs off keyboard<

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