Britney Spears has a sex tape, maybe, don’t quote me on that

October 3rd, 2007 // 78 Comments
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Britney Spears allegedly hooked up with some guy in Hawaii and supposedly their encounter was videotaped. The Sun reports:

The man in question says he met the singer on holiday in June and taped their alleged night of lust in Britney’s hotel room.

However, according to the unnamed man, the romp was a bit of a damp squib.

He reportedly told a US magazine: “It was just normal sex, we didn’t do anything crazy. It was a little disappointing. It lasted for about 25 minutes and then we passed out.”

So the last sex tape The Sun reported on turned out to be a joke. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is as well. The video will turn out to be some unfunny comedian, like, I dunno, anyone on SNL, doing a bag of Cheetos. Which is ironically how I imagine sex with Britney is like: Sad, awkward and with a lot of crumbs afterwards. Just thinking about this makes me want to sob uncontrollably in the shower while I scrub off a layer of skin. Where did those crumbs come from? Oh God, must scrub harder.

Images: Splash
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  1. ssdd

    Right now, I don’t care for her over the whole kids issue…I don’t care for Fed either… but I just really wish the media would back off for a while. Not one bit am I feeling sorry for her.. no…I’m just wondering why the blogs/paps/media/radio and anyone else just can’t let it go for a while. …
    Sometimes, to me, …. things can get way to carried away..and so when this happens I tend to look at the seeker, not the source.
    No harm meant Fish.. all said with good intent.

  2. Adeliza, you also might want to preview his SNL DIAB sketch that he is now doing at his concerts before you consider taking children to one of his concerts. (link to DIAB sketch in my name)

  3. A Britney sex tape would further solidify her classiness. She’s like almost royalty with her class. Am I right or am I right?

  4. m

    She has tree trunk legs and looks like a man.

  5. I_want_to_funk_Britney_Spears

    wait…

    Isn’t her WHOLE LIFE just one big sex tape?!

  6. Briana

    She looks like a trailer trash princess.

  7. Well she’s gotta do something to get her career back.
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  8. If this turns out to be another joke I’ll have a bitch fit. But I can’t help hoping Brit made a sex tape 5 years ago that’s yet to be released. Hang on isn’t her new album out soon? Hmmm.

  9. _

    Like knives in my eyes…

  10. @TS. Yes Akon is a black guy who looks like an eggplant with teeth.

  11. FromOutOfNoWhere

    Totally hot, it’s a shame we’re not getting enough bootay shots of Britney.

    G-

  12. Trixie

    Why is it that Britney is more dedicated to that little mutt, than she is to the kids? Every picture shows her cuddling that dog.

  13. naw 54

    her legs are shapely, pretty shaped thighs here, goes in at the knee, then back out. her legs are hot….
    her ass is def hot and perky here.

  14. Mr Clean

    Is she bald in the video? Bald Britney sex would be sooo hot

  15. I hate people

    Here’s Britney reacting to losing of her ugly bird hat (awe Brit don’t cry just go find a mirror and everything will be okay or you know just touch your head)

    http://www.people.com/people/gallery/0,,20100371_2,00.html

    and here’s britney reacting to the loss of her two children(“yeah it’s party time finaly those brats are gone!”)

    http://www.tmz.com/2007/10/01/smiling-brit-out-and-about-after-losing-kids-wtf/

  16. Kareem Ofwheat

    She looks good in those shorts… too bad for the stupid boots.

  17. somebody

    she has a sex tape with some body.. ive seen it. go to richardsrealm.com

  18. BunnyButt

    Who’s the poor bastard with Cheetos stains on his cock?

  19. BunnyButt

    Which reminds me, we haven’t seen TT again today, have we?

  20. ali

    does anyone even care anymore? :\

  21. Catherine

    i think she looks ok in these photos other than the hideous outfit

  22. Big Dumb Oaf

    Does anyone have a closeup of Johhny Fairplays face hitting the stage after attacking Danny?

  23. starlitaf

    the dog looks incredibly uncomfortable. i would be too.

  24. mpuckett

    she looks kind of cute at least

  25. Jennifer

    Anyone notice that since she no longer has her sons to tote around as accessories, she has a dog filling in for them? She is a freak…

  26. xman

    I will file it with my Tonya harding tape

  27. annoying, and after a lot of crumbs. Just thinking about this makes me sob uncontrollably in the shower, although I have to wash away the layer of skin

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