Britney Spears gives deposition

January 22nd, 2008 // 119 Comments

Britney “Nipples” Spears showed up at the law office of Mark Vincent Kaplan yesterday and spent two hours giving her deposition in the custody battle between her and Kevin Federline. She was heard outside speaking in a British accent before giving her keys to a valet. It’s been rumored that Britney will give more of her deposition today, but OK! Magazine is saying she’s done for the week:

OK! can also exclusively report that the remaining four hours of today’s deposition (Britney bailed after only two hours) will “most likely be split up into several smaller depositions between now and April 9″ because “she simply can’t sit still,” says a source close to the case.

So Duchess McNip-Nips decided to give a deposition. You know what always helps prove you’re not insane? Using a fake accent during a recorded legal proceeding. Although to Britney’s braless credit, nobody noticed she spent the entire two hours talking about tea and crumpets. Well, except for Mark Vincent Kaplan who, five minutes into her deposition, wrapped his tie around his head and started popping open bottles of champagne. He’ll later be distinctly heard on tape talking on the phone: “Kevin! Dude, bring strippers or I will sue! Ha! But seriously I will.”

Pacific Coast News, Splash News

  1. thats what she gets for being so stupid

  2. kat

    why do her lips match the cowboy killers in her hand??

  3. thats what she gets for being so stupid

  4. No more Britney Shitney Please

    enough with her. seriously. move on, Fish.

  5. Big deal. She sort of act like a grown up and maybe shows she cares about her kids in some very small way..

  6. seriously

    Seriously! Where’s your freakin’ bra you skank?!!

  7. I wonder if Kevin knew she was this crazy the whole time or if he was like, “god damn, glad I got out before this shit hit.” I’ve seen women go crazy with in like a month. How much easier could the lawyer’s job get?

  8. havoc

    Who cares?

    I’d watch her get facialized……but that’s about it.

    She’s past done……


  9. Annabel

    If faking a British accent during custody battle doesn’t show parental concern, then I don’t know what does.

  10. deaconjones

    What a dumb cunt…she’s officially crazy

  11. Chauncey Gardner

    I’d much rather see her give de(com)position.

  12. Ted from LA

    I can’t think of anything funny to say about this. Fuck.

  13. Gerald_Tarrant

    Since no one understands Posh Spice, Britney has decided to model her life after Posh. Nips and a British accent, she thought Adnan was a Mexican (soccer player, yes all Mexicans play soccer, shut up) with a British accent and that was as close to Becks as she could get.

  14. missywissy

    What’s up? Adnan’s gone, she’s finally abiding to what she should be doing with the courts…. could she be getting her shit together???? ha….. As for the British accent- she’s definately pulling a Madonna. How the hell does Madge get away with it? Because her husband is English? Even Hillary Clinton is faking accents lately. I like it when Oprah puts on her ghetto accent out of nowhere. Britney is just following our lady leaders. A British accent sounds way more intellegent than a southern one. Hill and Oprah should take a cue from our pop star leaders. You go Brit!!! If you can’t make it, fake it!!!

  15. Woody Allen's Girlfriend - Sexy Fetus

    (satisfied and smoking a cigarette the itsy bitsy lover shakes her tiny head in amazement at Brit’s insanity. “I know it’s a tough world, it took a relationship with a an elderly pervert to get me where I am, but squeeky shees even an unformed l’il thingy like me wouldn’t act like that!”)
    OUR Little Lady

  16. FCS

    Can’t sit still eh? Must be the bi-polar. Or her massive METH addiction, either or. And woula bra be to much to ask when your trying to get your kids back?

  17. theboss

    did anyone hear what brad renfro died of? i can’t seem to find anything on it. i know he wasn’t a super star, but he does have a movie coming out.

  18. ptprez

    she needs to date cesar laurean or drew peterson…

  19. RosiesVaginaSap

    I wonder if Brit ever thought she would be going bald before 30. What the fuck is her hair made of, yarn? She’s like a big greasy Raggedy Ann doll.

  20. To the posters who say “buy a bra” – Stop it! The men of the world would prefer most women don’t wear them! Nipples are good, even coming from this train wreck!

  21. KT

    She is NOT talking in a British accent. She is talking in an English accent. There is a very big fucking difference.

  22. Jade

    Sooo.. did she speak in her new accent during her deposition?

    If she did, she’s crazy. If she didn’t, she’s not crazy, which makes her crazy because she’s acting like someone who shouldn’t have custody of kids. Either way she loses.

  23. Racer X

    Nice juggs.

  24. #1 hater

    she’s hot…!!!

  25. ella

    ummm, KT england is part of britain … so an english accent is a british accent …

  26. cap'm pickles

    nippy, nippy who who. Looks like she’s been twisting the shit out of those things.

  27. jenny

    She is all about holding that left boob up with her crooked arm. I guess the fact that a bra would do that for her escaped her.

  28. joco

    Get a bra. I don’t want to see nasty saggy tits. They’ll be hanging off her knees in a few years.

  29. Chauncey Gardner

    Hey, why isn’t Tom Cruise trying to save her?

  30. The Office Whore

    Nice fivehead..

  31. Thomas

    If this were the 2000 Britney, legal and lithe, I’d shimmy up one of those legs like a native boy looking for a coconut. As it is now, those nice nips are connected to the diseased, gaping train-tunnel-like maw of an excuse for a vagina and that inside and out nasty head. There’s no amount of latex I could trust to protect me from the industrial strength coochie cooties that girl has…

    Speaking of which, any status on how Drew Barrymore is doing in the decontamination unit? Has the Tom Green radiation half-life dropped enough to allow safe habitation by human penii?

  32. @30 It think that is a six head.

    How are you today Office Whore?

  33. I’m so extremely surprised:
    With that shape a person is simply obliged to wear a BRAH.
    That RED lipstick with your black hair>>>>>it couldn’t look cheaper.
    Is your bag from the FUN-FAIR?

    with other words:
    this again is a HUGE MESS!!
    (btw, buy some kids, the role-model is there all right: YOU!!)

  34. Aline

    I used to laugh at her antics.
    Now she makes me sick.
    For real.

  35. mrs.t

    Did I just see a MiniBoden ad popup at the top of this page? Really? Are there that many moms up in here?

  36. KT

    Um…ella, I’m pretty sure that Britain is three countries. Given that I’m Scottish and all, I’d like to THINK I’d know. There is no such thing as a British accent. It’s kind of like saying Russians have the same accent as Dutch people because they are part of the same land mass.

  37. aonine

    I like her. seems saw her before on a celebrity and millioniare dating site like or something. i Will check if it is true.

  38. nipolian

    I have the sudden urge to titty fuck her……..The worst I could get is a severe case of the crabs…..right?

  39. #12 – Don’t feel bad, you’re in good company here, myself included. I mean, how many kittens can you set aflame before it just stops tickling your funny bone? Ok, fine, maybe that’s a bad example… that never gets old…

  40. deaconjones


    Don’t they?

  41. D. Richards (Dung Heap.)

    That shade of lipstick; what does it remind me of? Yes! My crippled aunt. My aunt used to wear that shade of lipstick. Cerebral Palsy: mangled legs, Bi-polar as well, ups and downs; more downs. Just a shell-of-a human being. A breather.

    Britney reminds me of her, minus the cerebral palsy. But wouldn’t it be cool if Britney needed a walker to get around? A crab-legged Britney slushing behind some 1950′s looking wheeled torture device that serves to not only to help with mobility, but also to destroy self-esteem, Priceless.

    Oh yeah, and those nipples scream class. I bet she lactates constantly.

  42. Well, somehow she to manages to become trashier by the day. At least she is still good at something.

  43. hotplateface

    Who let the retards in? I mean #37 by that.

  44. hotplateface

    Who let the retards in? I mean #37 by that.

  45. hotplateface

    Who let the retards in? I mean #37 by that.

  46. The Ex

    Nippey Spears!!!!

  47. hotplateface

    My name is Jimbo and I hang out on this really cool celebrity blog, and people thing I’m really cool. I’ve made a lot of friends. I am very popular. I mean, I know people think about me all day long and dream of my witty comments.

  48. The Ex

    Im sick of that Sam nobody always behind her, its like one of those flys always after smelly things. He should her his own tragedy going…

  49. KT

    40. I am feeling patriotic today. And pedantic, obviously.

  50. sicasso

    I can’t wait to read the obituaries that have been written for her!

    good times. good times.

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