Britney Spears’ family expects her to die

October 3rd, 2007 // 87 Comments

Britney Spears’ aunt Chanda McGovern is speaking out about her family’s fear that Britney will commit suicide. And here we go, finally the family members are being dug out of the south and interviewed. The circus is now complete. Now I am the master. Whoops, sorry, ignore that last line. Here’s what Chanda had to say to The Sun:

On Britney possibly committing suicide:
“We are worried about suicidal tendencies in her. Everything is spiraling down and she has not got a backbone — a family member to help her. We fear that one day we may turn on the TV that she’s done something terrible to herself.”

On Britney’s outlandish behavior:
“Every time you turn the TV on it’s something and every time it’s more negative than the last. It gets worse and worse. Not wearing panties is not something a true southern girl would do. Then, in front of the paparazzi when she crashed into the car and said, ‘Oops’ and took off, she knows better than that.”

On Britney’s VMA performance:
“In some of the clips we’ve seen it looks like either she’s on something or so drunk she doesn’t know what world she’s in. It’s heartbreaking. Everybody is human, but she needs to come back down to earth. Her mother was always her backbone. Since they’ve fallen out everything has gone to hell.”

On Britney’s kids:
“The kids came second and her party life came first so it really wasn’t a shock that the kids have been taken away from her. It was just very disappointing. You just want to reach out and grab her and hug her and tell her you love her. I want to knock some sense into her and say, ‘Britney — wake up!’”

Look, I’ve got this whole thing figured out. I can’t sit on the sidelines without offering some sort of assistance here. What you need with Britney is some sort of reward system. Every time she gets the kids to brush her teeth, hey, here’s a Chalupa. Make it one day without dropping one, surprise, welcome to your Blizzard. Now for the more serious matters; If Britney makes it a whole week without drinking, Ronald McDonald will come to her house and bring a sack full of Big Macs. You might question my methods, but keep in mind I’m not a licensed therapist. I did house-train a dog once, so I think that qualifies me in regards to Britney. Actually I think that makes me overqualified, but I don’t have time to quibble over details.

Images: Splash

  1. Xenu


  2. boo

    Her bodyguard testified that she would get up in the afternoon and after getting her Starbucks would go for a manicure. If she has daily manicures, WHY do her nails always look so awful?

  3. BabyGater

    God, she is gross. And sorry Bonny, but her kids are gross. ALL kids are gross, and annoying. Only mothers actually LIKE their kids…most everyone else HATES your kids and thinks they are annoying little brats. And yes, Shitney’s kids DO look like they smell sour…that smell is so gross, so many little boys have that reek about them…ugh. Kids should be drowned, they are utterly repulsive beasts. Shitney’s kids are going to be such white trash when they grow up….just drown them now, for the good of humanity!

  4. BabyGater

    Oh, and I swear, I just wanna slap that fugly, stupid-assed hat off her pointy, empty little head. She always looks so smelly, sweaty, and stupid. That shirt is hideous, and those shorts are just ugly. Nobody wants to see her fat, stumpy legs. I bet those boots smell so bad, when she peels them off her fungus-ridden, rotten, diseased feet, birds probably fall out of the sky. The funk from her boots is probably what causes the smog in LA! How does she always look so disheveled and grungy? Where does she find those rags she calls clothes? And you just KNOW she overpays for that shit….God, she is so fucking stupid, there are just no words for her. We need to make up a new word that describes something so utterly repulsive and hated by so many. Why won’t she die? WHY?

  5. mamadough

    she brings it on her own damn self! if she wasn’t so FUCKING STUPID and listened to the people that were trying to help her (her lawyer as a good example). maybe she needs a good downward mental spiral to adjust her shit and wake up. i don’t really like children but that doesn’t stop me from feeling bad for her spawn. nobody loves them or even really wants them. and somewhere a kitten just died.

  6. Canuck

    Alot of these comments are hypocritical, she probably looks so messed up and disheveled with stained and wrinkled clothes BECAUSE of her children. Who has time to do their nails when they have toddlers running around! When my kids were that age my clothes were always dirty and stained from their dirty little hands. She looks like a mom, of course, all the other shit she does, I have no explanation for.

  7. Kimmie Socha

    I will never give up on Britney! She kicks ass!

  8. LivewireT

    #57 Someone should kick your ass for saying that

  9. jacknasty

    it isnt even a little bit interesting any more…just sad

  10. Carole

    What the hell is up with her fingers in the main picture? Ew.

  11. mabbo

    How dare she wear that “outfit” with that fabulous Versace purse!?? Ugh! Who cares about her stupid kids…get her a new stylist stat!

  12. InstantAsshat-AddFame

    I agree, this is old. When the Fish starts sounding the same every day, and we start sounding the same everyday, then we need to do what we say Britney needs to do (disappear), and just not post about any Britney entries for awhile. So…guess this will be the last one I’ll comment on for awhile. I am sick of reading about how her kids are fugly and she’s fugly, countered by the amateur psychologists saying Brit-tit needs sympathy. Wash, rinse, and repeat.

  13. ella

    what has she been waiting for so long? die bitch, dieeee

  14. Big Dumb Oaf

    When ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Sometimes ya don’t go when ya oughta, then ya get all bloated and stuff and start doing stupid. It’s not pretty, but I’m no judge of beauty being a Big Dumb Oaf.

  15. leelee

    Superfish— please check your grammar, it’s distracting.

  16. Abby

    WTF! “dug them out of the south” what the hell is that? I like to make fun of Britney Spears as much as the next person but I am from the south and I know that I’m smarter than what ever smart ass makes these posts.

  17. Rozossko Jones

    Well, whatever. She’s certainly got some problems in need of expert help to remedy and it’s too bad she went and foolishly got kids involved in it. They’re there now, so it is what it is… Regardless, she should still have plenty of money and opportunities for improvement, options most can’t even dream of, really…

    A specific rant here: folks really should lay off about the whole “no panties” thing. The girl DID just have two babies in a year’s time and may well still have some lingering incontinence issues from it, as is not unheard of. If that’s the case, it makes a kind of sense for her to ditch the underwear so as to facilitate quicker relief in the bathroom or to enable her to simply go under her skirt if she gets “caught short.”

    A few spots on a skirt or drips on the legs probably beats hanging around in wet panties all night. With all the coverage she gets, she can’t really afford to be seen with adult diapers or pads on, so she has to simply go the unfurnished basement route.

    Just a thought, anyway.

  18. Sid Hoffrenchman

    #58 said:

    “#57 Someone should kick your ass for saying that”

    Who should do it then? You?

    Unlikely. Snarky internet twits are usually all talk, so you surely meant someone else.

  19. evilqueen

    Dear Britney

    no matter how bad the situation is, no matter how depress you are, please DON’T commit suicide because its NOT worth it… These ROGUES will take everything (properties, cars, assets, money, your precious children etc) from you which u once work hard from it and these rogues DON’T deserve it – no matter how hard they plot)

    like i said earlier, though i may not be your biggest fan neither i would want to see you in such a state and i have TOTAL faith in you.

    PS : If i’m left with nothing but $20 dollars, i would still buy your next album.

  20. umawwi

    The puss is in those boots again. Dammit all to hell.

  21. show

    I’m glad that Britney loves partying more than kids. Because so do i, i would kill my kids if i ever had any. I dunno why everytime i see a baby it makes me want to hurt them, like slap or punch.
    I was once watching a toddler and her 4 year old brother, and i pushed her down the brother saw it and their mom came in to ask what happened. The boy said that i pushed her down, but i lied and blamed it on him. Of course the mom believed me. I just like hurting babies and toddlers, but i wouldn’t kill them. Unless i was pregnant i would drown them or something.
    PS: i’m not crazy or anything i just dislike children, i know i was one once but i would NEVER have my own.

  22. John

    Yea I have to say. I don’t really feel much sympathy for her. Here’s a girl who’s got everything: looks, money, fame. And she’s self destructing.

    If she’s fucking herself up then she’s only got herself to blame. Same goes for Lyndsay Lohan.

    Isn’t it funny all the same how none of them seem to actually enjoy that lifestyle and all seem to self destruct except for Paris. She seems to have her shit together – I hate to say it.

  23. Alyssa

    I bet she ODs on bigmacs

  24. Drug dealer on speed dial

    700K a month…Now, that can buy alot of blow!

  25. Christ on a Crotch

    72, you know why Paris seems to have it together…..I’ll tell ya.

    Paris isn’t trying to impress anyone. When you believe you are “the shit,” then you are. Paris knows she’s a cartoon character, she knows she can’t sing, she know’s she’s not that cute, but she doesn’t care. She has a sense of identity, of self. Now it may be overblown and conceited but she loves her self.

    Britney and Lohan don’t love themselves; they keep waiting for someone else to tell them they are purty and all that shit. Paris doesn’t wait for compliments; she compliments herself and that’s why she seems to have her shit together. That and being born with a titanium spoon in her mouth, let’s not forget that.

    She’s got the secret. If you think it is so, then it is so. Britney and Lohan don’t think they are good enough and it shows. They walk around with “I’m the shit” attitudes but it’s not real. They hate themselves.

  26. amiyes

    this is my 1st post but OMG! then im paris hilton because i know im better than anyone else and that is a fact. i know im great, beautiful, unique, only child, non american, and umm… beautiful. but im missing money, so i want my parents to support me for 10 or 15 years. my mom says im selfish but thats ok. im a little shallow too but thats fine to me. idc if guys dont like that because i dont need one. i dont think theres anyone ikn this world thats good enough for me except me. i love myself with all my heart bye

  27. Blaggers

    Ok, we get it: She’s fat. Move on, seriously, the joke is old.

  28. used2likeher

    her fingernails are gross

  29. I’m eagerly awaiting the great news….

  30. Foxy

    Give trailer trash an expensive Versace bag & what do they do? Stick their gum under it like it was a table at a Waffle House.

  31. name

    First!! Oh wait… : P

  32. Yndi

    Wow, all these comments about ugly kids, how she should actually just end her own life and how this and that ..

    I really do feel more sorry for all of you then i do for Britney.

    Any wonder that this world we live in is heading towards extermination with people like you in it that doesnt give a crap about most things except your own little e-peen!

    Shes at that stage for obvious reasons and if you cant see it then you gotta be living in America – ohoh did i actually say that out loud ?! well, its just a fact that you are the most stupid nation in the world and clearly you have proven it in this thread, gg!

    Who gives a flying fuck about how rich she is, famous and all that except the jealous type (many of you).
    Here you are making fun at her when she has done more good then any one of you combined.

    Here is a new subject you can start criticize and laugh at – your own lifes!

  33. Ms. L

    Who gives a shit about Brit? Not me. I’m sick of pix of her especially when she has the same exact outfits.
    1) The bag dress with no bra, that is slipping off the shoulder and short enough to show her crotch and ass getting in and out of cars.
    2) The hat. Can’t forget the hat. She is divorced from K-Fed and likes to sport his fedoras. OR, if she’s in a Madonna mood, she’ll try to sport a cowboy hat.
    3) The fucking boots. Boots and a bag-sun-dress thing. Stunning. I get that she needs to hide the fat calves somehow, so hence the boots.
    4) Big sunglasses, like we won’t know who she is.
    5) No make up and bad messy reddish lipstick (to match zits and the chewed off red nail polish)
    6) Mouth agape to reveal gum (that is when she is not sucking lollypop or kid’s pacifier)

    Even people on the street are like, “dang, $700K a month and she looks like she came outa’ Goodwill?” I don’t feel sorry for this skank anymore and I am sick of looking at her.

  34. Makemepuke

    Brittany is a fuckin idiot pure and simple…she’s a spoiled little bitch and the paparrazi know it and they are feeding on her like sharks surrounding a wounded sea lion…..what I’m trying to say so may word is that she needs to get smart and do something for her community like help impoverished kids or something.

  35. Ryan Lepore

    Yes, Britney might die either from suicide or from natural causes.

  36. emgem

    I think the real people who need to wake up is US! She is an obvious MK ULTRA victim! Do your research people, we can save ms. britney jean spears!!

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