UPDATE: Britney Spears faces questions in custody battle

Britney Spears will be questioned in court today by Kevin Federline’s lawyers. She has avoided a deposition four times so far this year, but Kevin’s lawyers finally got the judge to put Britney on the stand. She’ll be drilled on her drug and alcohol use and parenting skills. The process could take several days, according to People:

“A deposition can be emotionally draining, because Kevin’s lawyer can ask very personal questions about her relationship with her kids – and she’ll be under oath,” explains L.A. family lawyer Lynn Soodik, who’s not involved with the case.

This should be some hardcore legal action that makes Law & Order look like your sister’s bike. Pink and fruity but you’ll still ride it to work. Anyway, I’m hoping to see Kevin Federline’s attorneys ask Britney Spears the tough question: When will she show her vagina again? Not that I want to see it or anything. I just happen to have a tarp I’d like to throw over it then possibly hold in place with a staple gun. I guess you can say I’m trying to live up to this WWJD bracelet I stole from a stripper.

UPDATE: Britney Spears is not attending the court hearing today citing a medical condition. Kevin’s lawyers are pissed, according to TMZ. I, on the other hand, think it’s cute they thought Britney would show up without being told there’d be a petting zoo.