Isaac Cohen reportedly broke up with Britney Spears over the phone Sunday night while she was in New York and he was in Los Angeles. Isaac’s agent confirmed the split, saying: “They are no longer an item.” A friend of Isaac claims he was “looking to get out of the relationship for awhile,” adding:
“It was a bit much for him. There was a lot of drama – it was too much of a whirlwind. It wasn’t one thing in particular. He likes her. They had a good time together. He was doing his best to help her out – but there is only so much one person can do.”
This isn’t like getting dumped by George Clooney, this is like getting dumped by the crazy guy who lives by himself in the woods. Isaac Cohen is a nobody and Britney Spears is filthy fucking rich. She could have a tiny old man growing out of her back and he theoretically would’ve stayed with her, so how far off the scale must she be where he was like, “This is just too much.” I’m guessing it was her constant oinking in bed. It takes a powerful mind to deal with unwillingly having sex with a farm animal.