Britney Spears doesn’t need pants

May 15th, 2007 // 80 Comments
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Britney Spears attended a party at club Teddy’s in Los Angeles on Saturday and spent the night in her underwear. She was in the back corner with her friends and her two bodyguards had blocked off the area. According to a witness:

“They were jumping around on the couches. And Britney was in her underwear.”
A waiter went to bus the table and was told, “No boys … no boys … you have to leave.” When a waitress asked if she wanted a drink, Britney said, “No, I’m just having Red Bull.” But, reports an eyewitness, while her friends did the ordering for, ostensibly, what they wanted to drink, it was Britney doing the drinking. Claims one on the scene: “Britney took shots throughout the night.”

I’m a fan of being pantless too, but at least I’ve got the decency to keep it in my own home. And what’s sad is this isn’t even surprising. The only thing people expect from Britney Spears these days is that she have a face. She could be spotted at a club eating a live baby and it wouldn’t even make the news.

And here she is at Millennium Dance Studio doing some sort of monkey impression.

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Comments (80)

  1. omgFRIST | May 15, 2007 at 11:44 am

    ^^^^^

    Reply
  2. Fishstick | May 15, 2007 at 11:46 am

    dammit! i wanted to be frist!

    Reply
  3. Bern | May 15, 2007 at 11:47 am

    Is she smelling her own armpit? It probably smells bad, friend.

    Reply
  4. teetotaller | May 15, 2007 at 11:48 am

    Whoa, Bern, your blog’s giant breast champion is intimidating yet delicate. I’d like me some of that.

    Reply
  5. Angie | May 15, 2007 at 11:51 am

    “The only thing people expect from Britney Spears these days is that she have a face. She could be spotted at a club eating a live baby and it wouldn’t even make the news.”

    whoa! fish u obviously aren’t “gude” with the “wurds” ’cause u said “have” a face. oh boy. what a grammar nerd.

    NOTE: yes, i usually sign in as N@ughty but why do so when comments are now officially disabled and your real name will get you famous? if not you, then me since i’m better than britney. sort of…i went to rehab once.

    Reply
  6. whoneedsenemies | May 15, 2007 at 11:53 am

    I used to have that outfit….when I was 4!! And I didn’t wear a bra just like shitney!!
    I can’t believe she went through MY trash. Sheesh!

    Reply
  7. Superfish | May 15, 2007 at 11:53 am

    Angie? you’re N@ughty? PROVE IT! show me some boobs or something. hell i’ll settle for a fake smile? N@ughty?! gee, and to think that i doubted you.

    **sighs and cuts his own throat

    Reply
  8. Angie | May 15, 2007 at 11:59 am

    superfish, please…PLEASE jump off the building before i push you? i dont wanna gain recognition for killing a menace to society and threat to the children

    Reply
  9. DingDong | May 15, 2007 at 12:00 pm

    That fat blimp is sooooo nasty. She looks fatter than ever and she is just horrendous looking. She has zero class and she is just plain fake and smelly. Also on the picture on the top left you can clearly see a nip piercing on her left. She is just a washed up no talent fat hooker! Hahaha

    Reply
  10. The_Squizz | May 15, 2007 at 12:03 pm

    No Pants! No Pants! How does she keep her dick secured??!?!?

    Reply
  11. srg | May 15, 2007 at 12:07 pm

    pants schmants

    Reply
  12. p0nk | May 15, 2007 at 12:07 pm

    about fucking time. i noticed my troll was able to get on here before i did. what a fuckwad.

    Reply
  13. captain obvious | May 15, 2007 at 12:08 pm

    why do her nipples always looking they are frowning and staring at the floor? probably because they’re embarrassed to be seen with her. i hate bras too, but come on, if you’re going out in public where you’ll be photographed nonstop, and you have a shirt on that shows your pepperoni’s…at least attempt to cover those suckers up. Espc since they ain’t perky anymore.

    Reply
  14. Fifth Stooge | May 15, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    She looks like a giant toilet seat cover.

    Reply
  15. wildchildintn | May 15, 2007 at 12:13 pm

    doesn’t it look like she’s saying “which one of ya’ll didn’t glue my wig on right?”…hee hee…
    And please, for the love of god, put a bra on…everyday. Bra and panties. That should be a requirement for her ass.

    Reply
  16. lisa | May 15, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    shitney’s clothes always have stains on them. she is trash. horrible thighs too.

    Reply
  17. hughjorganthethird | May 15, 2007 at 12:16 pm

    Wow she looks great. Really trully a stunning vision in yellow.

    Now if only she were bald and semi-literate she’d be perfect…

    Reply
  18. gimmie_ sammiches | May 15, 2007 at 12:17 pm

    DON’T WEAR THAT THING ON YOUR HEAD IF YOU CAN’T KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF IT!

    Reply
  19. gimmie_sammiches | May 15, 2007 at 12:18 pm

    was that too loud? sorry.

    Reply
  20. LeeLee | May 15, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    you know, every time I want to be antisocial and jump up and down on couches in my bra with my girlfriends I totally go out to a club.

    They might as well have brought sleeping bags and flashlights telling ghost stories.

    Reply
  21. BarbadoSlim | May 15, 2007 at 12:26 pm

    Ugh, britney’s unwashed stanky vag wafting its toxic fumes inside an enclosed environment.

    gross

    Reply
  22. DancingQueen | May 15, 2007 at 12:27 pm

    This fucking site is pissing me off! Too many comments??? What the fuck??!

    Anywho, I think she’s holding the wig on with her right arm up like that. Maybe the wind was blowing it around.

    People, people! Nobody noticed that she is showing her CANKLES!!!! No boots OR tube socks today! It’s a miracle!!!!

    Reply
  23. ticklemyfancy | May 15, 2007 at 12:27 pm

    She has girlfriends? I’m confused.

    Reply
  24. Angelina Jolie | May 15, 2007 at 12:28 pm

    Has anybody checked to see if maybe somebody has switched Britney’s real brain with that of a chimp? Because she’s acting awfully chimpy. I’m just sayin’, it makes as much sense as anything else. That yellow dress alone is an indication of somethign seriously wrong with her.

    Reply
  25. sunkissed | May 15, 2007 at 12:29 pm

    she will always be a fugly skank.

    Reply
  26. jimbo | May 15, 2007 at 12:31 pm

    I love Jan Brady.

    Reply
  27. BarbadoSlim | May 15, 2007 at 12:33 pm

    My retired aunt Dolores has those exact same curtains she’s wearing. She lives down in Boca.

    Reply
  28. eggman | May 15, 2007 at 12:34 pm

    “about fucking time. i noticed my troll was able to get on here before i did. what a fuckwad.”

    don’t be so hard on yourself. your troll is almost always more clever than you are.

    Reply
  29. whoneedsenemies | May 15, 2007 at 12:37 pm

    It’s always nice to see the brown pubes poking out below her nasty blonde wig…

    Reply
  30. TrailerParkCommittee | May 15, 2007 at 12:38 pm

    Yes she’s smelling her underarm just to make sure her deodorant, which consist of Blue Ribbon Beer and Pork Rhinds hasn’t started to fade.
    AND..of course she’s in a convertible, drinking a clear glass of K-Fed YooHoo!

    BUT I’M SORRY, It seems like we’re all forgeting one very important thing.

    THE BITCH IS BALD
    (pause…gathering the strength to type on)
    WITH A WIG…
    WRAPPED IN A PONYTAIL!

    I’d much rather look at her doing her Bruce Willis impersonation than the Wicked Mop of the West!

    Reply
  31. p0nk | May 15, 2007 at 12:41 pm

    #28 fuck off. the last time you were clever is when you got your mom drunk enough to give you a blow job.

    Reply
  32. eggman | May 15, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    p0nk is that a recurrent dream of yours? do you want to discuss its meaning? or do you not feel “safe” here? wait – here, have some (more) estrogen…later we can use that coupon to get 50% off when you wax your pussy.

    Reply
  33. BritsArmpit | May 15, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    Before I became a world famous Porno stunt double, I use to interpret dialog from pictures.

    Ex. Pic #11
    “Dang y’all..stop me if you heard this joke. What did the Verizon Guy say to Peppy Le Peu? (giggled) Can you smell me now!”

    Reply
  34. FRIST!!! | May 15, 2007 at 12:57 pm

    Who the FUCK is signing in as omgFRIST??!!!???
    Jesus, I go to Target and come back and someone is trying to steal my name??!!?
    I’m FRIST!!!

    Reply
  35. FRIST!!! | May 15, 2007 at 12:59 pm

    DAMMIT!!! Plus it said I wasn’t signed in anymore, and PLUS it said I posted too many comments!!!
    FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT FIXIT

    Reply
  36. Spindoc | May 15, 2007 at 1:02 pm

    What is going on? Seriously, what kind of restaurant lets some idiot come in and dance around in their underwear. I would make an effort to patronize any restaurant that actually took the time to throw out this waste of space. Not that I’d want to sit on the same chair as her unless it had been boiled…

    Reply
  37. Stoned Bored | May 15, 2007 at 1:04 pm

    I’d hump her.

    Reply
  38. TexasTranny | May 15, 2007 at 1:04 pm

    At least she’s wearing panties. I can see them in pic #2……mmmmmmmmm pretty panties.

    Reply
  39. bungoone | May 15, 2007 at 1:22 pm

    those nipples are the size of saucers. secure that business under a bra Britney! and i see she has her beautiful gold lamé purse again.

    putting that wig in a ponytail totally defeats the purpose of hiding what little hair she has growing in. she is obviously ashamed of what she did & regrets it 100%, but personally, i’d be more ashamed of the ridiculously cheap wigs.

    Reply
  40. Eva | May 15, 2007 at 1:24 pm

    The girl in the very first enlarged pic with her mouth all open looked exactly like Lindsay in her nipple-slip pics. Look for yourself.

    Reply
  41. Eva | May 15, 2007 at 1:28 pm

    …and TCLTC (Bringing it back to this board!)

    Reply
  42. suzy | May 15, 2007 at 2:02 pm

    lol, oh man

    she isn’t fat. just those kinds of dresses make everyone look kind of big because they are “baby doll” dresse or something.

    Reply
  43. Techclerk | May 15, 2007 at 2:14 pm

    I agree with post #24. Remember Lancelot Link the chimp gumshoe detective? She dresses like the female chimp characters on that show. She lip syncs like the Evolution Revolution, too!

    Reply
  44. Chauncey Gardner | May 15, 2007 at 2:15 pm

    She obviously doesn’t need brains, either. I always thought the braindead were supposed to wither away in a hospital bed eating through a tube and pissing into a catheter, like that Schaivo bitch, but Britney somehow manages. Amazing!

    In other news of the braindead, Jerry Falwell is dead! HUZZAH!

    Reply
  45. techclerk | May 15, 2007 at 2:16 pm

    I also heard she throws her poop at you if you come too close to her cage.

    Reply
  46. The superfish guy is on coke | May 15, 2007 at 2:17 pm

    “OOPS I SUCKED IT AGAIN!!!”

    Reply
  47. techclerk | May 15, 2007 at 2:25 pm

    A moment of silence please for the passed Reverend Jerry Falwell and those at Heritage USA who will miss him.

    Big surprise. I’d think he was going to be carried to heaven by angels sent to save him from dying on this wicked earth.

    Reply
  48. J | May 15, 2007 at 2:43 pm

    MSNBC and the NYP are such crap. X17 had pics of her at Teddy’s on FRIDAY night, not Saturday…and she wasn’t drunk at all. Please.

    Reply
  49. Justyna | May 15, 2007 at 2:51 pm

    :( she used to be so pretty and fun and gorgeous, now she just looks old and worn out… it’s kinda sad

    Reply
  50. johnnywad | May 15, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    Ummmmm…. a giant lemon drop… with massive boobies.

    #47: Jerry Falwell is walking around in hell, trying to help all the Muslim nut jobs find their 72 virgins.

    Reply

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