Britney Spears debuts ’3′

October 30th, 2009 // 100 Comments

Britney Spears debuted the video for “3″ on her official blog today, and if you had any concerns about her not being able to hack it as a stripper once she drowns her career in Frappucinos and crazy, this thing should put those fears to rest. Britney’s clearly mastered the key skills of wearing a revealing swimsuit, hanging from objects and rocking the thighs of a field hockey player. Granted, she may refuse crumpled up bills if they don’t smell like bacon, I’m confident she’ll adapt over time/enough trips to Wendy’s dollar menu. (She responds to repetition.)

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Comments (100)

  1. Second | October 30, 2009 at 12:34 pm

    Second

    Reply
  2. Krissy | October 30, 2009 at 12:40 pm

    It’s too bad she went so nuts, she’ll never break that stigma now.

    Reply
  3. Delgo | October 30, 2009 at 12:40 pm

    I blew a loaf (not a typo)

    Reply
  4. Dogless | October 30, 2009 at 12:41 pm

    I’d like to break HER stigma.

    Reply
  5. George Constanza | October 30, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    A little gyration, nursery rhyme wording, muted lighting & electronic overdub = big $$. What a country!

    Reply
  6. sam | October 30, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    meh i would still skullfuck her

    Reply
  7. Dogless | October 30, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    Okay, I take back #4.

    That was fucking awful.

    Reply
  8. Sally | October 30, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    booooooooooooooooooooooringggggggg.

    Reply
  9. havoc | October 30, 2009 at 12:45 pm

    She’s still nuttier than a shithouse rat.

    There is absolutely nothing behind those eyes….

    .

    Reply
  10. Pooters | October 30, 2009 at 12:46 pm

    @3: I am laughing over here!

    Reply
  11. It's Me Fuckers | October 30, 2009 at 12:47 pm

    besides the ‘man back’ in the white outfit, she looks great!

    Reply
  12. sam | October 30, 2009 at 12:47 pm

    @7 no dont it gave me mega lols

    Reply
  13. Stef | October 30, 2009 at 12:51 pm

    Reminds me of clubbing in DC. Bad house music, pseudo-lesbian grinding and stanky people in uber-skimpy clothes.

    Reply
  14. she's a has been no-talent | October 30, 2009 at 12:53 pm

    She’s not the hot 18 year old anymore, and has absolutely no credibility. So, what’s a has been no-talent to do? Why, sex it up! That’s right, she’s following the path already created by that hag madonna: pander to perverts & homos. Ol’ slutney will soon be courting the gay disco audience; it’s all she has left after being rejected by anyone with any music sense at all…

    Reply
  15. hacksaw | October 30, 2009 at 12:53 pm

    I’d hit it.

    Reply
  16. sam | October 30, 2009 at 12:54 pm

    @13 thats not a nice thing to say about your grandma

    Reply
  17. AnonymousError | October 30, 2009 at 12:55 pm

    I like it but all of her videos are totally interchangeable. You could play any of her songs over the footage and it would look okay. That being said even though shes a total lunatic I love the bitch.
    Get it girllll !

    Reply
  18. nice | October 30, 2009 at 12:56 pm

    with properly applied make up, styled hair and maybe with a loss of 8-16 pounds (no more i don’t like skeletons) she would be the prettiest girl ever on this website – by miles imo. Her legs are shaped like barbie’s- and with the weight loss it would thin them out just right. She also has the face on an angel. I know I will have hate speech spewed at me for saying this- but i don’t care- that is my honest opinion. I don’t care for your 6 foot anorexic, slanty eyed models, with their giant flat feet.

    Reply
  19. Me | October 30, 2009 at 12:59 pm

    Why does her voice sound like she is 12 years old? And I’m not talking about the awful auto tune crap… Is she still looking for a daddy?

    Reply
  20. sam | October 30, 2009 at 12:59 pm

    @18 you must be an old hag

    Reply
  21. kris | October 30, 2009 at 1:00 pm

    @ 9 is right on and I also agree with @ 15 mostly cause I like the phrase I’D HIT IT!!

    Reply
  22. JonGosselin | October 30, 2009 at 1:02 pm

    I would do a reality show with this babe, a Billy Goat and a female sheep. We would all get naked and fly around the world in a balloon. I would make wild love to Britney while the Billy Goat rubbed it head against the balloon and the sheep screamed out its baa baa baa’s. The show would be awesome.

    Reply
  23. she does look good | October 30, 2009 at 1:05 pm

    @20
    pipe down olive oil. while i don’t completely agree i see their point

    Reply
  24. Seriously... | October 30, 2009 at 1:07 pm

    When did Brooke Hogan start singing? When will she stop eating? And why am I still turned on?

    Reply
  25. sam | October 30, 2009 at 1:13 pm

    @23 popeye is going to be pissed with you now!

    Reply
  26. sam | October 30, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    @23 why should i pipe down, just because im a lonely old spinster

    Reply
  27. RK | October 30, 2009 at 1:21 pm

    Ha. They edited out “Living in sin is the new thing”

    Reply
  28. J | October 30, 2009 at 1:23 pm

    Plenty of man back but no one has commented on her disgusting extensions or greasy hair?? ewww honey seriously… either wear a wig or hide away for 2 years until you can grow all of your real hair back… Also she reuses the same damn choreography for every fucking video… if you can’t sing you should at least give us some new dance moves.

    Reply
  29. Kurt C | October 30, 2009 at 1:25 pm

    Musical talent is inversely proportional to the number of stage props and dancers you have during a show.

    Reply
  30. Dave | October 30, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    Did someone really write:

    “Scope Out the Video After the Jump”

    Oh that’s just not right.

    Reply
  31. lulu | October 30, 2009 at 1:37 pm

    #28 says it all…completely agree

    Reply
  32. @30 | October 30, 2009 at 1:40 pm

    SCOPE OUT !!!! That is so retro!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  33. Shannon | October 30, 2009 at 1:55 pm

    Love her.
    No matter what you say!

    Reply
  34. Max Planck | October 30, 2009 at 2:01 pm

    She is not a musician. She is a corporate product.

    They own all the copyrights so if she does not perform, she makes no money.

    Count on her to be around a long time. Like seeing Madonna when she’s 80.

    Reply
  35. Rosie | October 30, 2009 at 2:17 pm

    By no means is Britney a singer but she is an entertainer. This particular video was not entertaining at all but she will still get paid. Why do I like her? Cause when everyone was clapping and kicking her when she fell she got back up. Gotta love the fighters and the crazy.

    Reply
  36. Go away, shitney | October 30, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    In the conversation about whether shitney has any talent, all you need to do is listen to that tape of her live feed singing at one of her “concerts” last year (she was attempting to sing, even though the taped version of her studio auto tune singing was being played to the audience). To say it sounded like a cat being strangled would be an insult to strangling cats. This bitch has absolutely not one drop of talent in her cheeto & frapaccino drenched fatty of a body. Time for her to disappear, and I mean for good.

    Reply
  37. Jen | October 30, 2009 at 2:37 pm

    for the 657th time: Britney, I love you. GET A FUCKING HAIRSTYLIST, FUCK!

    Reply
  38. Rough intentions | October 30, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    Of course youre a -camp over the weekend- listerine challanged fan of Britney gyrating concerts. for someone who would accuse me of stalking I would expect you to be those types # 35.

    Reply
  39. oneill | October 30, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    that was so awful. and yet i watched it twice.

    Reply
  40. Carlee | October 30, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    she looks so good!

    Reply
  41. Jennyjenjen | October 30, 2009 at 2:47 pm

    @28 I know! Can’t somebody make her wash her hair? She has more money than God yet she has ghetto ass extensions..

    Reply
  42. ugh | October 30, 2009 at 3:00 pm

    she is VERY pretty in the face – but she should take out those extensions and wear her regular hair! she obviously doesn’t know how to style the extensions!!!

    Reply
  43. thmunger | October 30, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    is she referring to farm animals? I guess she had to dumb down menage a toi to3 for the american red neck audience. What is wrong with our country that allows this bimbo to get famous much less come back from infamous behavior!

    Reply
  44. Areas | October 30, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    in this video she would be hotter if:
    -her eyebrows were done by a professional
    -her makeup was properly applied
    -better, relaxed dancing moves
    -an improvement of her wardrobe

    the turned next and the hair flipping isn’t working for her. britney, fire your makeup artist, choreographer, and stylist. please.

    Reply
  45. tromba | October 30, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    Britney looked great. The music was just mindless, machine generated garbage.

    Reply
  46. L | October 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    Lady Gaga called…she wants her video back.

    Reply
  47. Areas | October 30, 2009 at 3:05 pm

    *neck, not next

    Reply
  48. chris | October 30, 2009 at 3:07 pm

    you have to admit she looks good, and hanging in their compared to alot of others, like Lindsey Lohan, winedhouse etc

    Reply
  49. Courtyardpigeon | October 30, 2009 at 3:21 pm

    Does anyone else think she sounds like a chipmunk when she sings? This song is so very bad.

    Reply
  50. Courtyardpigeon | October 30, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    I shit you not, here are the lyrics, I mean “poetry”

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P
    Everybody loves ***
    Countin’

    Babe, pick a night
    To come out and play
    If it’s alright
    What do you say?

    Merrier the more
    Triple fun that way
    Twister on the floor
    What do you say?

    Are – you in
    Livin’ in sin is the new thing (yeah)
    Are – you in
    I am countin’!

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P
    Everybody loves ***
    Countin’

    Three is a charm
    Two is not the same
    I don’t see the harm
    So are you game?

    Lets’ make a team
    Make ‘em say my name
    Lovin’ the extreme
    Now are you game?

    Are – you in
    Livin’ in sin is the new thing
    Are – you in
    I am countin’!

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P
    Everybody loves ***
    Countin’

    Babe, pick a night
    To come out and play
    If it’s alright
    What do you say?

    Merrier the more
    Triple fun that way
    Twister on the floor
    What do you say?

    Are – you in
    Livin’ in sin is the new thing (yeah)
    Are – you in
    I am countin’!

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P
    Everybody loves ***
    Countin’

    Three is a charm
    Two is not the same
    I don’t see the harm
    So are you game?

    Lets’ make a team
    Make ‘em say my name
    Lovin’ the extreme
    Now are you game?

    Are – you in
    Livin’ in sin is the new thing
    Are – you in
    I am countin’!

    1, 2, 3
    Not only you and me
    Got one eighty degrees
    And I’m caught in between
    Countin’
    1, 2, 3
    Peter, Paul & Mary
    Gettin’ down with 3P
    Everybody loves ***

    What we do is innocent
    Just for fun and nothin’ meant
    If you don’t like the company
    Let’s just do it you and me
    You and me…
    Or three….
    Or four….
    - On the floor!

    Everybody loves ***

    What we do is innocent
    Just for fun and nothin’ meant
    If you don’t like the company
    Let’s just do it you and me
    You and me…
    Or three….
    Or four….
    - On the floor!

    Reply

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